a world of possibilities, dreaming, embracing the future, giving up, goals, Life, love, online dating, optimism, plans, relationships
“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
― Albert Einstein
In the darkness of my room, in the safety and comfort of my bed, right before I am about to fall asleep, thoughts occupy my mind…All kinds of thought and memories. Often good thoughts, sometimes thoughts of Ex and the way we were (which I have been good at keeping those at bay), but most often what is on my mind are dreams and plans of an awesome tomorrow. At that very moment every night the world is full of promise and the possibilities are endless. At that very moment I could conquer the world. I often think about some special someone I may be talking to online or on the phone, and all its promise of a future together.
Finding a partner and starting a family is a recurring dream. When I say starting a family it doesn’t mean having kids. Even though the idea of kids are amazing; at this point is no longer feasible. So it will probably be a family of two adults acting like kids, and perhaps a few dogs.
“Without leaps of imagination or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all is a form of planning.”
― Gloria Steinem
But last night a dark thought entered my mind. It interrupted my day-dreaming, it got me scared. The following words came into my mind: it isn’t all a bit too late?
That thought woke me right up! Since when did I let facts and reality interrupt my awesome illusory life? Am I turning into a realist? Or worst yet, a pessimist? I love being a dreamer, an optimistic. I love thinking that the world is amazing and life is beautiful. I go out of my way to focus on the good only.
The next thought was: Should I give up? Give up on the idea of finding a partner? I thought I would never say this, but I am thinking that perhaps it is just too late. Too late, way too late to find a husband and start a life together. Yes, I said it! I want a husband! I want the commitment, the partnership, the idea of romance, fairy-tale, forever. And yes I also said that perhaps I decided to want that a bit too late in life. In my teens, twenties, thirties, I never wanted the wedding, the marriage, the fairy-tale. I pushed it all aside and focused on surviving, and thriving in all other areas of my life.
“We dream to give ourselves hope. To stop dreaming – well, that’s like saying you can never change your fate.”
― Amy Tan
My single life is awesome and I adore all I have, and having the right partner would add to it. But I am also aware of the potential of encountering the wrong person and all of a sudden realizing that I was better off alone.
Do I continue to live an illusion or do I wake up and wise up? Is it harmful to live in la-la-land?
“Dreams, if they’re any good, are always a little bit crazy. ”
― Ray Charles
I guess those thoughts came to me because of being excited about someone I am getting to know online. He seems full of potential, and at times too good to be true. We have not met yet as I want to dedicate my free time now to my visiting mother and decided to meet him after she leaves in about 2 weeks.
As I navigate the online dating waters, I alternate between hopeful and cynical. Somebody contacts me and it seems really promising, I get excited and the next instant he totally disappoints me. Perhaps this time I am trying to protect myself about being too hopeful.
With all that being said I rather spend my days and nights in the illusion of the infinite world of possibilities. I rather continue to think that my dreams will come true and work towards that. I rather think that perhaps next time I turn a corner I may bump into Price Charming. I rather bask in the rays of oblivion, than to live in a world where “I missed the boat” because I dared to go at my own pace and do things my way and on my time.
“There is nothing like a dream to create the future.”
― Victor Hugo
I have noticed that people are often too afraid. They are afraid of trying, of taking a chance. Afraid of putting themselves out there and looking desperate. People are afraid of failing and therefore they give up on trying. They are afraid of getting hurt. Afraid of taking a chance on love. Afraid of looking foolish.
I am not saying everyone should have a partner. What I am saying is that I want one and I am not afraid of appearing desperate and foolish. I will not give up on that idea at the present moment. What I am saying is that people should not be afraid of taking a chance on what they want, be it a boyfriend, a new job, a singing career, a single life. Whatever it is that you dream with/about go ahead and take steps to make it a reality.
The harder something is to achieve the better it will taste when you finally get it. There is nothing better than reaping the rewards of hard work, of taking a chance and making it.
“Nothing happens unless first a dream.”
― Carl Sandburg
If you are satisfied with single life, stay single! I am not there…yet, perhaps tomorrow I will wake up and think single is the way to go, until then there is online dating. Until then I will distract myself dreaming of the possibilities.
I want someone like me. I want the fearless! I want the one that keeps falling flat on his face and keeps going. I want the one that keeps going after what he wants against all odds.
And with that I am telling the dark pessimistic thoughts to go bother somebody else. I am not an easy prey! I look great with my rose colored glasses on! I got dreams to make into reality and goals to achieve. I don’t have time for negativity and darkness!
Always a dreamer and proud of it!!
“I believe in everything until it’s disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it’s in your mind. Who’s to say that dreams and nightmares aren’t as real as the here and now?”
― John Lennon
A Prophetic Walk said:
Thanks for this post!
A Star on the Forehead said:
Thank YOU for finding something in it! Blessings! 🙂
I am a bit older than you and I do have children so my situation is different and yet the same. I too have such dreams and often wonder whether I am dreaming of a future or mourning the past. Should I hang on or let go? So while I have probably let go of my meet-prince-charming-and-live-happily-ever-after dream; I am starting to see the other dreams …. lost careers….lost passions …. as still being there and worthwhile to bring into my world of reality.
Everything worthwhile begins with a dream and with hope.
A Star on the Forehead said:
different and equal, the important thing is to never stop dreaming about. Not to have something to dream about would be the worst thing that could happen to us, to humanity in general. I am glad that you are finding other dreams, but love has no age or schedule so it can happen at any time. And that is the beauty of life, anything can happen, we just need to be open to it.
Many blessings! 🙂
I, too, am older than you. Here is my current feelings: People should concentrate on themselves until they are, at least, satisfied with where and how they are. It is not too late to find someone. I will tell you this: should you feel terribly lost and that it has become too late, contact me. From reading your posts and our brief conversations, I know that I would care for you – this should stave off that feeling that there is no one out there 🙂
A Star on the Forehead said:
oh Scott, you are so sweet! Thank you for your kind words! You too seem like a great, genuine person.
To me one never finishes growing and improving themselves, but I can say that I am satisfied with myself and my life. Still I search for the One, and until the One comes along I am entertained by all the Maybes. 🙂
Many blessings to you and thank you again! 🙂
Tails from Paris said:
Thanks for your interest in “Tails from Paris”. We’re now following your blog.
Hey ! You know you can treat yourself with a little trip to Paris if you feel like it : http://sousnoscouettes.com/
And you’re back for dinner : we promise 😉
Alix & Roxane
Do not ever stop dreaming….. and one day you know we will find the one…. I still like you , thinking occasionaly shall I leave it and give up but then I really miss the companionship the cuddles, and much more. I do not look for marriage as I am still scared from the divorce but a bit of commitment in being a partner. Let’s keep going!
A Star on the Forehead said:
Lets! Mom left after spending a month here, so now I have my free time back to go on dates! Let the search and hope continue! 🙂