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Category Archives: Dating

The waiting game and spark-less dates

16 Wednesday Jan 2019

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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“The happiness you are seeking is not to be found in the flow of life, but in your attitude toward whatever life brings.” ― Ramesh S. Balsekar

Life proceeds with the ups and downs.  I proceed with gratitude.  On the downs I tell myself that it will pass and I remember the ups.  Without the downs life would just be flat and boring.  At the up times I remember to be even more grateful.

SALE OF APARTMENT

The contract is signed.  I am hoping to close soon but we have to wait for the title search that normally takes 2 to 3 weeks.  For this impatient Aries having to wait is painful, but it is also a chance to learn acceptance.  So I sit back, breath and inhale patience.

I was at the apartment last night and I remembered how much I loved living there.  It is so cozy.   I moved out to go live with the ex-boyfriend.  After 3 years there he cheated on me and broke my heart, and I started this blog.

I felt a bit nostalgic.  I reminded myself the reasons why I am selling it: for simplicity, for less encurbements.  It is the end of a chapter.

“It is always important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over.” – Paulo Coelho

DATES

I have had a couple of date these past several days.  I decided to keep those 2 very short, just coffee dates.

Mr. A.  He is 61 and is a psychologist and also involved in a business venture.  We met at a nice coffee shop in my neighborhood.  His ex-wife and business partner was having issues and texting him non-stop.   For some reason I didn’t really care about that.

He is a bit too much for me.  It is hard to explain.  He talked non-stop.  I had trouble keeping up with all he was saying.  No chemistry but I think we may still become friends and bond over spirituals and zen pursuits.  Some of what I was able to grasp from what he was saying was actually interesting.

Mr. L.  He is 55 and works for the NY Federal Court System.   We met in Grand Central Station, which was very convenient for me, so I appreciated his thoughtfulness with that.  We had some pleasant conversation but I did most of the talking.  We seem to be at very different stages in life even though we are almost the same age.  Again, a good guy but not for me. Zero chemistry.

“Let yourself disappear in the darkness; if you are loved, people will come and find you with torches in their hands! Love is a great searcher; it always searches the loved one! To see who really love you, just disappear!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan

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Dates and Decisions

05 Saturday Jan 2019

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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DATING

Update on the date with Mr. J. – We met at a Brazilian restaurant on 46th Street called Ipanema.  We had a couple of appetizers that were delicious.  I had the passion fruit caipirinha and he had the original one.

We talked non-stop like old friends and bonded over our love of skiing. Unfortunately there wasn’t much chemistry.  Also his divorce is not final yet and he is still living in the family home.  It is going to be awhile until he gets his situation sorted out and I don’t want to get involved in it, chemistry or no chemistry.

I have no dates schedule.  I want to date more but I will only schedule something if I think that there is an inkling of chance that I will meet a lover or a friend.

Speaking of friend, I have a friend date scheduled with my friend A. for another sauna, gym and food session tomorrow.  We are going to try a natural organic vegetarian restaurant. I am shocked to say that I am looking forward to it. 🙂

“None of us knows what might happen even the next minute, yet still we go forward. Because we trust. Because we have Faith.” ― Paulo Coelho

****

APARTMENT SALE (Simplifying life)

My apartment was listed on Thursday afternoon.  By the end of the day I already had an offer for my full asking price.  Did I list too low?  It is hard to tell.  It seems comparable to apartments in the area and the ones that have been sold in the complex.

At the same time there are not a lot of similar properties in the market so my realtor and I hoped to generate a buzz and possibly receive multiple offers. I was hoping for a cash offer and not have to deal with waiting for financing, etc.

The person that made the offer is someone that has been interested in the apartment for years.  She wanted to rent but missed that to someone that gave me a full year of rent payments in advance.

She made the offer on the condition that I would not go through with an Open House  scheduled for tomorrow.  I declined. I want to do at least one and see what happens.

I don’t think this person will go away if she really wants it, but it is a gamble.

I am a bit sad about selling this apartment.  I really loved it when I lived there but the chances that I will go back and live there are slim to none. The apartment I live at now has 2 bedrooms and is closer to the train station. Two things I need at this time.

On the other hand there is jubilation.  There is this feeling of freedom and of leaving the past in the past, good or bad.

Time to let go, move on and simplify.

“Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify.” – Henry David Thoreau

A whole new year to learn, to live and to love

03 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating

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“There will be no New Year for those who keep living in the older years! If you really want to enter a new year, shot all the doors behind you and stick yourself to the New Year where everything is ready for you to be designed by you! Every man is an artist and every artist has the power to create infinite things; just be in the present time and design your life! No man can design his life by being in the past because present time is the only studio we can do our work!” -― Mehmet Murat ildan

2019 is here!  Now what?  Now we get to forget all the failures of 2018 and have a whole year to be successful. How exciting: A whole year to make new memories!

I want to do more this year.  More of everything. More dating, more exercise, more reading, and more writing. I want to live more.  When I die I don’t want to leave any living on the table.  No regrets!

*** DATING

Mr. M. We had a couple of dates. He is a 60 year old executive in the health industry.  We kissed on the second date and it was okay.  The earth didn’t move, but I wouldn’t mind being kissed again.  Then things fizzled.  I think he wanted me to be more aggressive and ask for a third date. I am not that into him to go after him.

Mr. J.  He is a construction engineer and we are having a first date tonight.  I don’t know much about him. We both enjoy skiing, that is what I am most excited about since I am dying to go skiing.  Perhaps we will hit off and plan some skiing trip.

Mr. A.  He is a psychologist. We have been exchanging email where he is mostly instructing me about Meditation and some other spiritual stuff.  It has been fascinating.  I think this will be a beautiful and rewarding friendship.  We are not talking about meeting yet but it will happen in due time.

I am open to meeting great minds and great hearts. I love meeting people that are open to sharing their knowledge with me. In that sense I am a sponge. Everyone is a teacher, and I am always ready to learn.

Mr. R.  We had a date last year then he disappeared.  He is now back asking me out for a drink.  I didn’t say no yet, but I don’t think I want to revisit the past.  He explained why he disappeared but even if he hadn’t disappeared I probably wouldn’t have gone on a second date.  He is smart and funny but we had zero chemistry.  I am going to offer friendship.

“Why did you do all this for me?’ he asked. ‘I don’t deserve it. I’ve never done anything for you.’ ‘You have been my friend,’ replied Charlotte. ‘That in itself is a tremendous thing.” ― E.B. White, Charlotte’s Web

I have been hanging out a lot with my friend A. We have definitely become great friends.  Remember, he is the friend that I kissed on occasion, but that I decided not to do it anymore. A kiss is harmless, but why do it if we don’t care for each other in that way?

On Sunday we went to the sauna, to a juice bar and then Starbucks.  We skipped the gym.  We had been there on Saturday and my hip was not happy.  Then in the evening he invited me to go to an Ethiopian Restaurant.  The food was good and I enjoyed giving it a try, but it is not at the top of my favorite cuisines.

After the restaurant he wanted to go to a specific bar, but it was closed.  He then asked if I wanted to go see his apartment, which I have never been to before even though it is only a 5 minute drive from my home.  I have been curious to see his apartment as I am always curious to see how people live but I decided to decline the invitation.  I didn’t want to be in a situation where he would try to kiss me and I would have to refuse. He would respect that I am sure but it would be awkward.  We have a great friendship going, why chance it? We joke and flirt but at the end of the day we both just want to be friends.

***

Image result for green book

On the first day of the year I had lazy day, then in the late afternoon my sister and I went to the movies. We saw The Green Book.  It was awesome.  It is a road trip where differences disappear and hardships unite.  Ultimately, to me, it was about friendship. It is about recognizing that we are all the same in our core.  Everyone just trying to survive and be happy.   It is a message of respect and kindness. I highly recommend it.

“Sometimes, I feel discriminated against, but it does not make me angry. It merely astonishes me. How can any deny themselves the pleasure of my company? It’s beyond me.” ― ZORA NEALE HURSTON

 

Chivalry needs to be resuscitated

08 Thursday Nov 2018

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating

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“To wish was to hope, and to hope was to expect” ― Jane Austen

Following up my last post where I mentioned the date with P. I was still thinking about his behavior.  I think that it bothered me even more than I was willing to admit.  I needed to get back to him with a yes or no in regards to the second date.  So I decided that honesty was the best policy and flat out asked him about it.

I emailed him: “Why would you hurry and get your food before I got there and not offer to get me my coffee?

Here is his reply: “I apologize for what appeared rude or improper behavior.  Frankly, what’s appropriate these days is not so clear as it used to be.  I wasn’t sure if it was going to be just a drink and conversation, or something more like a  mini meal.  I was very hungry so I had some choices.  If I ordered something that took time to cook, but I didn’t know how far away you were, either I’d have time to eat fast, or you’d show up close to when I got my food, so I would wait for you to get what you wanted.

When it comes to buying your coffee, food or whatever, this is a meeting, not a date(as some women have said to me!), so it seems fair and “modern” to just each of us do our own thing. The old way, the guy always buying, has a touch of “She owes me now” to it, especially in this time when #metoo has emerged. I am trying to tread lightly, not be aggressive or overbearing or make you in any way feel “obligated” to me. Maybe I’m overdoing it. Maybe I’m overanalyzing. All I can say is it’s not easy being a guy sometimes! lol 

Yes…I probably could have let all our conversations be that “first meeting” and treated this more like a first date.  But if we both had actually felt exactly like that, we probably would have been locked lip to lip in a lengthy goodbye kiss on the sidewalk. “

“A gentleman is someone who does not what he wants to do, but what he should do.” ― Haruki Murakami

That answer didn’t make everything all better.

Manners and chivalry are always appropriate, that to me is clear as a bell.  It sounded like he really thought about how to get his food so that he didn’t have to buy mine. He knew I was just a couple minutes away.  I am thinking he was being just cheap.

I think many men are coming up with the excuse that the first date is just a meeting and therefore they don’t need to pay for anything.  For the women that say that I think they don’t want to be stuck with someone they don’t like.  I understand and don’t want to judge, but for me the first date is the first date.  I only agree to meet people that I think could at least be a friend.  If I don’t want to sacrifice an hour or 2 of my time I just don’t agree to meet the person period.

I don’t care where we meet, at the park or the library, but if he chooses a coffee shop I expect that he is paying for my coffee. After all I got my hair done, nails done, I am wearing perfume.  Everyone is making an effort to put their best foot forward or so I hope.

#metoo?  Really?  He is going to use that?  What does that have to do with a cup of coffee?

Why would I think I owe the guy anything because he paid for my coffee?  To me it is just a kind gesture.  It sounds to me that he is the one that has expectations when he does anything for a woman.

We had been exchanging emails for over 3 months on a daily basis.  I expected more.  I expected a cup of coffee and it seems that he expected passionate kisses.

We exchanged a couple of emails after the one above.  I politely declined the second date and wished him luck.

And so it goes…

“Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and should be and he will become as he can and should be.” ― Stephen R. Covey

No date, Brazilian Trump, stress galore and gym time

30 Tuesday Oct 2018

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, EX Files, Finding Me

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Dating or the lack of it – Unfortunately no update on the date with P. because a date didn’t happen yet. He had to cancel once and I cancelled twice.  We both had work issues.  We both don’t seem motivated to make this date happen.  I am not motivated to go on a dates in general lately.

If it happens I will definitely post about it.

“Life is short. Focus on what really matters most. You have to change your priorities over time.” ― Roy T. Bennett

Stress, Stress, Stress –The amount of craziness and stress I had on Friday and Saturday was insane. I credit God for giving me the strength to not lose it.

Equipment broke at work and because the boss is out sick was up to me to make decisions and deal with that area. Dealing with tech and such can be a nightmare.  Since then one thing keeps breaking after another.

My tenant was calling me the whole day on Saturday while I was at work tending to the equipment emergencies.  Finally at the end of the day he tells me he is not staying and I should be receiving a letter from his attorney.  He had been complained of noise and fighting in the apartment next door.  I have no control of that and since he doesn’t have a contract he can move out at any time after giving me a 30 day notice.  So I am not sure what his attorney has to write me about so I sit on pins and needles until I get said letter.

Not everything is a lawsuit!  Unfortunately a lot people don’t think that way.

I can hardly wait for him to be out so I can put this apartment up for sale.  It would make more sense financially to rent it out and keep it awhile longer but I don’t have the time and energy to be a landlord. My peace of mind is priceless.

I also know that all is for the best and for my betterment.  Everything is a lesson.  Everyone is a teacher.

“I promise you nothing is as chaotic as it seems. Nothing is worth diminishing your health. Nothing is worth poisoning yourself into stress, anxiety, and fear.” ― Steve Maraboli

Brazilian Trump – Now in Brazil, in keeping with modeling ourselves on the US we have elected the Brazilian Trump.  His name is Jair Bolsonaro.  I hope to God that he is blessed with good advisors. I pray that he honors love, equality and the well-being of every Brazilian, but so far what I have heard of him is scary.

Similar to the US, I do understand why people voted for such a person.  They wanted a change.  They are tired of the crime and corruption and wanted a change.  Well, at least I hope that that is the reason and not that, deep down inside, they are all haters.  I hope and pray that things will not become as polarized in Brazil as they are now in the US.

It does seem that Trump’s reach has no boundaries.  He seems to be influencing the entire world to be more selfish and mean towards each other.

Unfortunately from the 2 main candidates that were left after the Primaries it was a lose-lose situation. Stay with the devil we know or choose a new one, perhaps much worse?

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” – Leo Tolstoy

Sauna, Gym and Dinner – On Sunday I agreed to go to the gym with my friend. I had canceled a couple of times so even though gym was the last thing I wanted to do I felt I had to.  Plus he sandwiched it between a sauna session and dinner, so the idea was more attractive.

We spend 50 minutes in 144 degrees.  I only started sweating a little bit in the end.  For some reason it takes a lot for me to sweat.

This sauna brought to the surface all kinds of feelings.  When I lived with Ex we had a sauna in the bedroom that was exactly like the one I was in on Sunday.  For a second it was like I was back in 2010 sitting next to Ex.

Yes, I missed that time for a second.  No, I don’t want it back.

After the sauna we went to Planet Fitness and did some weight training for over an hour.  It is amazing how I just fell back in love with weight lifting in a second.  Of course I overdid on the weights and today I can’t barely walk.   Call me crazy but I love the pain of feeling I got a good workout.

After showering we went to a Mexican Restaurant called Tequila Sunrise.  I had passion fruit mojito and he had water.  I had steak fajita and he had vegetables.  He is really into being healthy, even more so lately.  I am into more moderation always and treating myself often.

It is interesting how from dating him a few times years ago we have just become great friends.  I know I have kissed him in the past, but I decided that it is not worth doing it anymore.  Next time he tries I am turning him down.  Being friends is so much better.  I don’t want to date him anymore.  I did back in 2015 when we dated, but after he was a bit evasive I realized he was not that interested. In turn I lost interest.

I do treasure his friendship and I am glad that he pushed me to join the gym.


“Make improvements, not excuses. Seek respect, not attention.” ― Roy T. Bennett

I can’t find a good excuse

24 Wednesday Oct 2018

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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“I can’t, my Mom is in town visiting”

For the past 4 weeks that has been my excuse for everything.

  • I couldn’t go on dates
  • I couldn’t join a gym
  • I couldn’t meet up with friends
  • I couldn’t organize my closet
  • I couldn’t get a mammography
  • I couldn’t eat healthy
  • I couldn’t do anything that required any mental or physical effort

I know that using my mom and my time with my mom as an excuse is very lame.  I know that I need to be stronger than my excuses.  I was not!  I am not!

I can certainly do things while my mother is in town (I did go on that 1 date with the attorney) but I always feel guilty for taking the time away from her. I need to find that elusive balance in life.

“The secret of happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less.”  – ― Socrates

Now I find myself looking for some other excuse no to go out and get all of those things done.

I can say that:

  • I am going to Brazil next month again (one has tickets to buy, bags to pack)
  • I am back to staying late at work (when Mom was here I was leaving at 2pm every day – that was sweet)
  • I  still haven’t got my hip issues sorted out
  • Thanksgiving is around the corner
  • and so is Christmas and New Years
  • the dog ate my homework.  oops, I don’t have a dog or homework.

“Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone” –― Pablo Picasso

But it is not all that bad:

  • The date is scheduled for tomorrow night, Thursday.  I am not excited about it but I need to go through with it.  This person has been waiting for a long time. Reminding myself to be open minded and not already predict doom.
  • I joined Planet Fitness yesterday.  I had promised my doctor friend that I would be his workout buddy.  Tomorrow night if the date ends early I am meeting him at the gym.  Drinks to follow. It is good to have rewards.
  • I have already started organizing my closet and taking the summer stuff out and replacing with the winter ones.  I haven’t worn half of my summer stuff.  I am not sure if that says I have too much stuff or that I am just too lazy and use the same thing every day.  Time to own less and be more creative.
  • Mammography scheduled for next week.  Can’t forget the girls.
  • Eating healthier is slowly starting again.  I really don’t eat that unhealthy but I have a tendency to overindulge in carbs and sugar.  I need to keep that in check.  This  daily brownie is becoming a habit hard to break. Moderation is key.

“The secret of change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”  ― Dan Millman

 

 

 

Another day, another dollar

15 Monday Oct 2018

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“Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have twenty-four hour days.” ― Zig Ziglar

Hip Issues:  I went to a hip specialist.  Looking at the X-ray he said that things didn’t look too bad but he needed a MRI to check things further.  I think he was a bit disappointed that it was not something serious that required surgery.  This doctor is very involved in new technology and surgery.

He said I have arthritis on my lower back but nothing too worrisome.  Because of insurance issues I am choosing to postpone the MRI until the beginning of next year.  In the meantime I will be making more of an effort to lose the extra weight I have gained in the last few months.  Any extra weight adds to the pain and discomfort.

“The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you want right now” ― Zig Ziglar

Date with the writer/attorney: On Thursday afternoon I went to his apartment.  He is selling his apartment so I was curious to see what over 2 Million dollars would get me in Downtown New York City.  He gave me a tour, showed me pictures and talked about the adventures of his youth. 

It is a cute apartment and the best feature is the patio and the car spot.  An apartment with a spot to park a car in New York City is unheard of.  It comes with a $2,800.00 condominium maintenance fee.  That is more than my mortgage, condo fee, taxes and insurance combined. I will not be buying an apartment in NY City any time soon.

He gave up the idea of running for Congress and will now dedicate his time to writing. Not having to work for money he can do whatever he fancies.  I can see the fun in that.

We then went to a French Restaurant called Bar 6. It was an early dinner and I was not that hungry so I just got a grilled cheese and fries.  It was good food  Then he called an Uber to take me to Grand Central station. While the date was nice I still didn’t feel any sparks and I don’t think it will appear no matter how many times I see him.  We may just become friends.

“If you go out looking for friends, you’re going to find they are very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.”  – ― Zig Ziglar

Work: It has been challenging dealing with a new employee that is bringing a whole new set of issues.  I am trying to see it as a growing experience.  New employee, new product we will be brokering, new customers, new compliance issues.  I can see the headaches to come… and also the opportunities.

“Ability can take you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there” -― Zig Ziglar
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Family:  I am so blessed to have a loving family.  I am blessed to still have my parents alive and well. Thinking of that makes me smile and be happy.  I have been really devoted to be with my mother while she is visiting.  I have been taking the train to work at 5:45am and leaving work at 2pm so I am home early to be with her while my sister goes to her job at the restaurant.  I love this schedule, but after Mom leaves I have to go back to leaving after 4pm.
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“The more you are grateful for what you have the more you will have to be grateful for” – Zig Ziglar
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Dating: It has taken a back seat.  I am speaking to one guy that I will meet after my Mom leaves, but that is it.  I haven’t found the motivation to actively be online.  I am sure I will go back to it, but for now I am okay with this break.

“Make today worth remembering.” – Zig Ziglar

 

Busy living

05 Friday Oct 2018

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“It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?” ― Henry David Thoreau

I am sorry my dear friends for my silence.  It was the usual busyness of life getting in the way of the fun stuff.  I promised to be more present .

I arrived from Brazil on Sunday.  It was an exhausting trip.  I had 4 dental visits and worked on some chores at my mom’s house that needed attention.  I also spent time hosting friends that often stop by to visit.  I hate to say it but sometimes I just want more peace and quiet and less visitors.

I came back to NY exhausted but happy.  Happiness can take many forms.  There is beauty and happiness in being exhausted.  My body is tired but I am re-energized by results and accomplishments.  I am blessed I still have my parents so any time spent with them and helping them is well worth it.

Dating:

The chef/restaurant owner: He still sends me brownies but we haven’t gone on any more dates. He was busy, then I was busy, but the truth is neither one of us is really that interested.  My sister is still working for him so it is best not to have any entanglements anyway.

The  lawyer/writer: Before I left for Brazil we had one date at a Brazilian restaurant called Plataforma in NY.  He is a non-practicing attorney and a writer. I do love writers!  According to him he has family money so he doesn’t need to work for money.  He spends time pursuing different interests.

He is talking about running for Congress and asked if I would be supportive.  Politics?  really?  I feel like running away screaming.  Still, he was extremely nice and intelligent.  Even though I didn’t get any sparks I have agreed to meet him next Thursday for dinner.  Stay tuned.

“They refused to live in these moments right now. And they got busy in turning everything they come across, into a memory, which they could visit in the future.” ― Akshay Vasu, The Abandoned Paradise: Unraveling the beauty of untouched thoughts and dreams

Mom is in town, so the usual gambling and shopping are the plans for this weekend.

Wishing everyone an awesome weekend!  May light and blessings pave your path and permeate your days!

 

Closing doors and making choices

10 Monday Sep 2018

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, EX Files

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G. sent me the text above.

He thought I couldn’t resist it.  I did.  I will not reply. I will not fall for the silly attempts.

I let him get back into my life once, thinking that we could build a great friendship after I realized that romance was not in the cards.   Then he made those comments about immigrants.

He was insensitive and never apologized for being so.  Perhaps if he had apologized the friendship could have been saved.

Instead he continued on with his hurtful comments, making matters even worst. He seemed intent on hurting me.

Now it pains me to ignore him. It pains me to ignore anyone.  But I need to stop leaving the door open for anyone to just waltz back in and hurt me again.

I have the power over who I let into my heart and life.  I am using that power.  I am choosing sanity and good energy.

G. don’t bother knocking, the door is locked for you. Don’t try the window either!

“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” – Roy T. Bennett

 

3 dates and a job

07 Friday Sep 2018

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My dating life is going slow as I haven’t been devoting much time to it.  Online dating does become like a second job sometimes.

I have managed however to have 3 dates with one guy.  That in itself is astonishing since I am mostly a one date girl.

On the first date we went for a late drink at a wine bar. I had prosecco, he had a couple of different red wines, and we shared a cheese platter.  There were no fireworks but he was nice and friendly.  He asked me on a second date that night and I said yes.

During that first date I mentioned that my sister was now living with me and looking for a job.  The next day he texted me and asked if my sister wanted to work some hours at his restaurant/catering business while she is going on interviews for something in her field.  I showed my sister the text and she agreed to go meet him at the restaurant the next day. She was hired to work 3 days a week.

On the second date he cooked for me at his restaurant. He made crostini with avocado, smoked salmon and capers on top, paired with prosecco (he remembered I like it) for the appetizers.  For the entree he made flank steak (which I had mentioned I liked), spaetzle (German egg noodle) and spinach, paired with red wine.  For dessert I had a choice of brownie sundae or ice cream sandwich. By then I was so full that I just had a chocolate chip cookie.  The photos above are not that great as I took them in the kitchen and not at the table.

For the third date we had drinks at an Italian restaurant and then went to a lounge with loud dance music as it was the only thing open after 11pm.  Still we found a quiet corner and managed to be able to talk.

I am still not sure about chemistry.  He is a great guy, but also a gentleman and there hasn’t been anything other than a peck on the lips.  Until there is a kiss I cannot tell where this will go.

He has 3 kids between the ages of 10 and 14 and he is busy with them every day.  He is also very busy with the restaurant and catering, so we haven’t met each other again after those 3 dates.  For now we have a texting friendship and that suits me fine, but if we ever start a romantic relationship the lack of time would probably annoy me.

It is a tricky dynamic to mix work with romance even though I am not the one working for him.  At first I was overthinking this, then I decided to relax and go with the flow.  First, this is just a part time gig for my sister and will not last forever.  Second, I have a feeling that he and I will just become good friends and not romantic mates.

I guess the message for me with this post is to keep an open mind.  Open mind to go  a second and third date even if there are no fireworks in the first.  Open mind to think that it is okay to have my sister work for someone I just met and that I can possibly have a relationship with.  Open mind to not shut him down for his lack of time and let things develop.  Open mind to try a different route.

Wishing you all a blessed and fun weekend!

“Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.” – Isaac Asimov