All about Me, Myself and I

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“In daily life we experience suffering more often than pleasure. If we are patient, in the sense of taking suffering voluntarily upon ourselves, even if we are not capable of doing this physically, then we will not lose our capacity for judgement. We should remember that if a situation cannot be changed, there is no point in worrying about it. If it can be changed, then there is no need to worry about it either, we should simply go about changing it.”
 Dalai Lama XIV, Dalai Lama’s Little Book of Inner Peace: The Essential Life and Teachings

Hello, I hope you all had an amazing weekend!

For the last few days, I have been dealing with feelings of powerlessness.

Family far away. I found out on Saturday that my brother has COVID.  My brother takes care of my older parents.

So many thoughts.  What if my brother gets so ill and has to go to the hospital?  What if my parents get it?

It is the type of situation that I wish I could get on a plane and get there asap.  But I can’t.  It is not that simple.  I have my tickets to Brazil already bought, but they are for April.

Fortunately, from Saturday until now, he is doing much better. So far, my parents haven’t contracted it.

It is so hard to live far away and not be able to just go and be with them.  I should be used to that situation already, after living in the US for the past 39 years.

Canceled date. I was going on a date on Sunday and my date canceled.  He also contracted COVID.  I was looking forward to that date.  Not because I thought we were such a good match, but because he seemed so intelligent and I imagined great conversations.  I no longer focus on the future of a date, I focus on the moment.

He wanted to talk on the phone until he recovers, I said no.  I am not sure why.  I keep going with my gut on the phone situation.  Sometimes I will give my number and talk on the phone, while other times I insist on meeting in person first.

Two people I know in 2 separate parts of the world getting Covid is to me such a reminder that Covid is not only still around, but it is here to stay.  We just need to learn to deal with it.

Cold sores.  I have never had a mouth/cold sore until last week.  I am glad it was small and not too unsightly.  This morning, it seems, I may be getting another one.  I am blaming it on the stress of work in the last months.  Stress and a possible weak immune system.  I have relaxed a bit on all I was doing to take care of myself.

It is all common sense the items on my list below, but it is so easy to relax a bit, and all of a sudden all I am doing is eating cake and watching Netflix.

So, starting now, I am focusing on:

  • Eating well. I do eat well, but 2 words: Less sugar!!
  • Sleeping well. Get to bed before 11pm.
  • Take Vitamin C. I take plenty of vitamins and supplements, but I just realized that I haven’t taken vitamin C in months.
  • Exercise more intentionally.  I walk on a treadmill every day, sometimes twice a day.  Every now and then I do some light weight training. I need to follow a program and a set of exercises.
  • Meditate (or just sit still). It does wonders for me when I take some time out of my day to just be still.

I am disappointed that I didn’t handle these feelings of powerlessness better.   I have read so much, experienced so much, wrote so much about it.  I should be a master at dealing with situations which I have no control of, by now.  This is another reminder that some lessons are never done.  We are constantly being tested.

I am disappointed when I realized that I had been putting myself and my well-being last. Work has been first for so long.  First with my assistant our for 3 months, then the audit for 6 months.  There was hardly any time for me in there.  2022 was very tough on me and my psyche.

The rest of 2023 will be all about me! ME! ME! ME!

“Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.”  The Dalai Lama

 

A star, not on the forehead

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“Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.” ― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Happy Sunday everyone!

I go to the mosaic studio twice a week, so I am always working on something.  Often, even before I finish a project, I already have an idea of what I am going to work on next.  This time I didn’t.

Looking around the studio I decided to do a star.  But the star shapes we had there didn’t appeal to me, so I decided to use a square frame and draw a star.

Very often, the end project is very different from my initial intention, for a variety of reasons.  Sometimes my initial idea is too ambitious (not in this case), sometimes the materials are not doing what I need them to do, sometimes I lose interest and I just want to get it done to start something else.

It is easy to dream up something… getting it done is the hard part.

I love doing mosaics, and the studio is my happy place,  but there are times that I only focus on the result and not in the process.  Mosaics is a my constant reminder to enjoy the journey and to stop focusing only on the destination.

I am, and forever will be, a student of mosaics and life.

Here is the star I made.  It is done with colored glass, and some small mirror tiles. I used black grout, instead of something lighter, to make more of an impact.  In the end it is not what I initially had in mind, but still I am happy with it.

“I know that I am mortal by nature, and ephemeral; but when I trace at my pleasure the windings to and fro of the heavenly bodies I no longer touch the earth with my feet: I stand in the presence of Zeus himself and take my fill of ambrosia” –  Ptolemy, Ptolemy’s Almagest

Everything works out in the end, if it hasn’t… just be patient

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Happy Friday everyone!

I am sorry about all the issues that some of you are having trying to reach my blog.  I hear you and I have been attempting to fix it.  I suspect things will get worse before they get better, so please hang in there.

I have also been experiencing issues while visiting some of you. I like or comment a post, and at that moment it shows.  If I refresh the page or go back to the post, it is no longer there.

I emailed WordPress and I am waiting on their response.   Please be patient with me and my blog.

And on the topic of patience, that is the always current lesson in my life.  I struggle with it; I fight with it.  It always fights back, and it always win.  Time and time again I realize that things are not on my timing.  I have to respect that, and get in line.

“A warrior of the Light is never in a hurry.
Time works in his favor; he learns to master his impatience and avoids acting without thinking.”
 Paulo Coelho, Warrior of the Light

Good news: Yesterday we had our audit exit interview.  It went well, no major findings.  They will be sending an official letter in the next few days.  Once we get the letter, we will have 10 days to reply.  I will probably have to write a couple of pages regarding the findings and corrections necessaries, but it shouldn’t be too bad.

And that should be the end of it.  Well, until we hear from them again.  We have been audited by our industry regulators in 2015, 2019, and 2022. The last one, ending now, after 6 months.

I still have plenty of other work to do, but not having auditors hanging over my head, never knowing when more questions are coming, is such a relief.

I found the writing below and it seems to have been written for an Aries (it fits me to a T). If anyone knows the author, please let me know so I can give it credit.

“Prayer of an Anonymous Abbess:

Lord, thou knowest better than myself that I am growing older and will soon be old. Keep me from becoming too talkative, and especially from the unfortunate habit of thinking that I must say something on every subject and at every opportunity.

Release me from the idea that I must straighten out other peoples’ affairs. With my immense treasure of experience and wisdom, it seems a pity not to let everybody partake of it. But thou knowest, Lord, that in the end I will need a few friends.

Keep me from the recital of endless details; give me wings to get to the point.

Grant me the patience to listen to the complaints of others; help me to endure them with charity. But seal my lips on my own aches and pains — they increase with the increasing years and my inclination to recount them is also increasing.

I will not ask thee for improved memory, only for a little more humility and less self-assurance when my own memory doesn’t agree with that of others. Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be wrong.

Keep me reasonably gentle. I do not have the ambition to become a saint — it is so hard to live with some of them — but a harsh old person is one of the devil’s masterpieces.

Make me sympathetic without being sentimental, helpful but not bossy. Let me discover merits where I had not expected them, and talents in people whom I had not thought to possess any. And, Lord, give me the grace to tell them so.

Amen”
― Anonymous

Have a blessed weekend!

Here is my sister! Well, something like that…

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“But the love of sisters needs no words. It does not depend on memories, or mementos, or proof. It runs as deep as a heartbeat. It is as ever present a s a pulse.” ― Lisa Wingate, Before We Were Yours

My sister became a U.S. citizen in November and I wanted to mark the date. While I don’t have the skills yet to do something more flattering, I came up with the piece below.  My sister has long curly hair and round glasses.  I think I have captured her essence, in a fun/funny way.  She liked it.  She cannot look at it without laughing.

I want to start doing more mosaics at home.  I get great ideas and advice at the studio, but I am really interested in what I can come up with without anybody’s input and with the material I have at home.

For the record I adore L., the studio owner.  She is the best and does the most amazing things.  She has helped my love for mosaics flourish.

I have also finished two other project at the studio, that I will be posting next.

 

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.” ― Jim Henson

When it is ok to be evasive

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“May what I do flow from me like a river, no forcing and no holding back, the way it is with children.”  Rainer Maria Rilke

My dating life ebbs and flows.  I go through cycles.  Sometimes I am very interested in dating, in finding a partner.  I go on Match often, I read a lot profiles, I send likes.

Other times, as in now,  I feel I have no time for it. Or, perhaps I should say ,I just don’t have much interest.  I guess it is a combination of those factors.

Work has been occupying a lot of my mental capacity.  The audit that started in August is still not finished, but it should be a matter of days now… fingers crossed.

Still, even with my lack of interest and time, I managed to exchange messages with someone and go on a date last Thursday night.

We met for dinner at Modern Restaurant in New Rochelle.  He is 50 years old and works as part of spiritual care team at a large hospital.  He is very accomplished and intelligent.  He was personable and we had good conversations, mostly about his background and about Rumi.  He is very well versed in on all things Rumi. I love Rumi.

I had a good time, but there was zero chemistry for me.

He paid me a lot compliments.  He said that I am much better in person than in my pictures.   That made me questions my pictures on Match.

“Nothing in this world is harder than speaking the truth, nothing easier than flattery.”  Fyodor Dostoevsky

He seemed really interested in me, and let me know it at every second.  While I appreciate the honesty and forwardness, it sometimes can smell of desperation and insincerity. Get to know someone more than a couple of hours before you start exalting them.

I don’t think he really knew how over the top he was really being. I did give him some pointers on future dates.  I pointed out that there is such thing as “too much too soon”.   He said I was his first date since he joined Match.  So perhaps that is the problem right there.  Too eager!

At the end of the date, he mentioned again that he was very enamored by me and wanted to see me again.  He said: “I desire you”.  That just made me cringe.

Then he asked if I was interested in him. Talk about putting someone on the spot!!

“I do know that the slickest way to lie is to tell the right amount of truth–then shut up.”  Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

I didn’t know how to answer.  Don’t get me wrong, I knew the answer.  It was NO.  I was not interested in seeing him again as a potential romantic partner.  I had zero interest in that.

I love the whole truth and nothing but the truth, and will always choose honesty above all else. But on first dates, safety comes first.  I don’t know if the person sitting across from me will turn into a raving lunatic upon rejection. I rather not chance it.

Even though my body and facial expression was screaming NO, out of my mouth came the words: “I am not sure.”

He looked deflated but said he understood.  We walked out of the restaurant, quickly hugged goodbye, and went our separate ways.

“It is not easy to keep silent when silence is a lie.”  Victor Hugo

The next day I opened Match, and was about to write him and tell him how I really felt.  While I was deciding what to write, he blocked me.

Thank you!   I love when things get resolved on their own.

Everything in life, and in this case, dates, are either a win or a lesson.  This time, again, it was a lesson.  I learned that I need to read profiles more carefully, ask more questions and pay attention to the answers.

While he seemed to be a nice person and I had a nice time, had I spent more time reading his profile and asking the right questions before the date, I would know he was not for me.

On the date, he said he was not interested in a committed relationship.  It turns out he is still married, and there will be no divorce.  It is a long story that he shared with me on the date, and I am choosing not to repeat here to protect the innocent.

I understand his situation.  It has to do with his past, insurance, finances and a personal sense of obligation.  Still, even if there was chemistry, I think it would be too much drama for me to get involved with.

While, at the moment, I am a bit tired and very slow with my dating efforts, I am still out there and still interested.  I enjoy online dating. I enjoy first dates, I enjoy meeting new people; and for me it is still the best place for me to meet people.  And I believe he is out there!  It is okay if you call me delusional lol

Remember: Safety first when online dating!

“It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.”  Noël Coward, Blithe Spirit

My 2022 in mosaics – finding peace in the broken pieces

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These are all the mosaic pieces I made in 2022.  I have already posted about all of them separately, but wanted to have them all together in one post.  It is fun to see the variety of inspiration, subject and materials I used.

Trust me, they look much better in person.  But then again, I am biased. They are all my babies.

January/February: This piece came out of nowhere.  As I was gathering somes glass pieces, they looked like a face to me.  That is how this very pensive and troubled woman was born. Her name was supposed to be Susie. But it is nameless for now.

 

February/March: This frame was not as I intended.  I intended on a frame for my brother.  But then came the flowers and sparkles.  I don’t think I will be using sparkles again. It is very shiny, but also very messy.

 

February/March: I was inspired by a greeting card.  Many band-aids later, this little bird was finished. It is hard to tell but it is made of glass pieces that I cut very small to give the idea of a snowy forest in the background.

 

March/April. I decided that my pensive and troubled lady needed a boyfriend. Just call him Jean Paul.

 

May/June: This pizza was inspired by the post I wrote called The Pizza Debacle.

 

May/June: I had just returned from the casino and saw some gambling inspiring ceramic at the studio, so why not?

 

June/July: I bought some old frames at a tag sale.  This one had blue flowers on it.  I let them guide me.

 

June/July: This next one also started with an old painting from the tag sale.  It had a painting of fruit in it, so I decided on grapes for my design.

 

August/September: After doing the woman, and then her boyfriend Jean Paul, I decided to create a whole whimsical little family. This is a piece that a lot people disliked, but of course, I loved it.

 

September: This flower is made of mugs and plates.  It has some texture and height to it.  Originally I liked my work to be flat, but the more involved I get with mosaics the more I want to try different styles and techniques.

 

October/November: After doing faces using glass, I wanted to try to make a face using ceramic.  It became a mask and I am happy with it.

 

November:  In an effort to try different surfaces, this time I used a vase.  While it is not my favorite, I am happy with the result.

 

November/December: This was based on a watercolor picture.  It is very hard to translate watercolor to mosaic. I am happy with this first attempt.

 

December:  This is one of my favorites. It is happy and it makes me happy.

 

This is the last piece I did in 2022.  It is out of broken plates.  I made this at home and grouted at the studio.

I am inspired now to make a post with all my mosaics from 20 and 21.

“I must try to enjoy all the graces that God has given me today. Grace cannot be hoarded. There are no banks where it can be deposited to be used when I feel more at peace with myself. If I do not make full use of these blessings, I will lose them forever.

God knows that we are all artists of life. One day, he gives us a hammer with which to make sculptures, another day he gives us brushes and paints with which to make a picture, or paper and a pencil to write with. But you cannot make a painting with a hammer, or a sculpture with a paintbrush. Therefore, however difficult it may be, I must accept today’s small blessings, even if they seem like curses because I am suffering and it’s a beautiful day, the sun is shining, and the children are singing in the street. This is the only way I will manage to leave my pain behind and rebuild my life.”
― Paulo Coelho , The Zahir

April and May 2022 – Dream and Doom

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“There’a a phrase, “the elephant in the living room”, which purports to describe what it’s like to live with a drug addict, an alcoholic, an abuser. People outside such relationships will sometimes ask, “How could you let such a business go on for so many years? Didn’t you see the elephant in the living room?” And it’s so hard for anyone living in a more normal situation to understand the answer that comes closest to the truth; “I’m sorry, but it was there when I moved in. I didn’t know it was an elephant; I thought it was part of the furniture.” There comes an aha-moment for some folks – the lucky ones – when they suddenly recognize the difference.” ― Stephen King

Continuing my recap of last year, here is April and May. I will focus on my relationship with B., which was the main theme of those months. (to read in detail, go to Archives)

Towards the end of March and beginning of April, B. and I met several times. He was kind and had flowers for me every time we saw each other. But there were times where we weren’t really in tune. He kept pushing to see me more often.  He was showing a possessive and insecure side.

In April I went to Brazil to see my family and bring my mom to the US for her biannual visit.

While in Brazil, I spoke to B. every night.  I wanted to pacify him. We grew closer and couldn’t wait to see each other.  This relationship was looking more and more like the love story I have been looking for.  He was again acting insecure and possessive on the phone, but I was blinded by the potential.

He would frame some outbursts as done out of loving me so much and didn’t want to get hurt if I was not as serious about the relationship as he was.

When I returned to the US, on April 19, things didn’t go as I had hoped.  I had mentioned to B. that my time was going to be limited because of my mom’s visit.  He said he understood it, but he kept complaining about not seeing me enough.

When we were together, he would say the right things, give me flowers and apologize for being demanding of my time.  When we were apart, he would fire off texts showing a possessive and insecure side that was not attractive at all.

There was one date, for our 2-month anniversary, that I acted like a baby.  I think it was already my gut, my instincts rebelling against this relationship.

Twice I had said to him that some of the texts he sent while angry were not acceptable. I told him that this push-pull behavior made me feel like I was being emotionally abused. He was shocked to hear that, apologized and promised to be more thoughtful before sending another one of those texts.

 “I am stuffing your mouth with your
promises and watching
you vomit them out upon my face.”
 Anne Sexton

Then, the day before I was to leave to Brazil to take my mom back, he got upset.  We had already said good bye with a dinner, but he wanted to see me one more time.  I changed my schedule a couple of times to see him again, but when there was another change, I said I couldn’t make it.  He then sent me a text calling me an a-hole.  Shock is not even the word to describe my feelings when I read that. He sent a couple of apologies in messenger and WhatsApp.  I didn’t reply and blocked him on both.

I will not be called names, specially by someone that supposedly loves me.  It is unacceptable to me.   I feel I dodged a bullet.  His demanding behavior and possessiveness kept getting worse.  His insecurity and fear of getting hurt always got the best of him. But that is no excuse.  A grown man should know how to behave, or seek help.

Had he not called me an a-hole, I would probably still be in that relationship.  Still trying to make it work, because it seemed so right sometimes.  I fell for the flowers and the potential.

I am glad I was leaving for Brazil the following day.  Being far away made it easier to not be tempted to give him yet another chance.  I was too busy with my family to think about him.  Well, I did think about him, but it made it easier to distract my mind.

Now, almost a year later, I am happy that I got out of that relationship relatively fast.  Had I stayed in it longer I can only imagine how it would destroy my mind and well-being.  Looking back there were so many issues, signs, offensive words disguised as “loving too much”.  There were so many things I ignored because it seemed so promising.

I remember when I wrote about it last year. I was embarrassed, and still in doubt about using the word “abuse”.  But it felt in my gut, it was in all the little words that hit me like a knife, and also in the beautiful flowers that made me smile.  At the end of conversations I was spent and questioning my sanity.  Yes, it was abuse and I am glad to be far from it, and to now be better able to recognize it.  Abuse comes in all forms.

My sister had already recognized it.  I would tell her about the dates. There were a couple of times that I remember her saying: “I am afraid of you going to his house.  He is unstable.” I thought she was overreacting.  I pacified her, and said that he would never physically hurt me.

Lesson learned:  Don’t ignore the red flags and your gut.  If someone is acting in a way that you think it is harmful to our mental health, don’t hang around.  Situations and actions escalate.  If you wonder if you are being mentally abused, you are! Run!

“The scars from mental cruelty can be as deep and long-lasting as wounds from punches or slaps but are often not as obvious. In fact, even among women who have experienced violence from a partner, half or more report that the man’s emotional abuse is what is causing them the greatest harm.” ― Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

 

This was March 2022

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My birthday month. It was a month of many dates.  Many lessons.

There was the Greek guy I went on a few dates with. When I realized that there was definitely no chemistry, I offered friendship. He accepted, or so I thought. After going out as friends with my sister and I, he began the repetitive calling and texting again.  The next time he asked me out I mentioned friendship again. He became defensive, and wanted to convince me that there was chemistry.  I let him vent, but in the end, he realized I was serious.  He stopped calling.

Lesson: People hear what they want to hear.  They create their own stories. Be firm and make sure there are no misunderstandings. 

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”  George Bernard Shaw

There was the date with the accountant.  Great first date, but he immediately started acting as if we were already a couple.   Already planning the future.  He was talking about expensive vacations, etc.  Too much too soon.  It would have been exciting if we had been going out for a few months; after just one date it is just overwhelming. I mentioned that to him, and just let things fizzle.

Lesson: Nice guy, trying too hard. Oftentimes people are in love with the idea of love, of a partner, and will attach themselves to the first person they meet.

“Any man’s measure is determined by what he will do when he is faced with his own deep need. Not how high he may reach but how low he may kneel.” – J. Otis Yoder, When You Pray

Date with B., the guy I had first had a few dates 5 years before.  We went on a couple of dates and it was seeming more and more like fate.

There were great dates and not so great dates.  I struggled with trying to be in the moment.  I was scared of the potential.  It seemed so meant to be, and at times, it seemed to be such a struggle.

There will be more to come about him…

“But all fairytales have rules, and perhaps it’s their rules that actually distinguish one fairytale from the other. These rules never need to be understood. They only need to be followed. If not, what they promise won’t come true.” ― Jostein Gaarder

In March I got the Covid booster shot to be able to travel to Brazil.  I was extremely conflicted about getting it, but had no choice.  Brazil was not letting anyone in without a vaccine and booster.  The choice was not to go to Brazil and see my family.  And that was no choice.

I remain conflicted about the vaccine. At this point I will not take any additional boosters. I will continue to do all I can to boost my immune system.

“What you think may change what you do, but what is also true is, what you do will change what you think.” ― J.R. Rim

Friends, Food, Fun and a Dog!

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On Saturday evening, my sister and I went to dinner at a friend’s house. She is married and has 2 kids.  The boy is 16 years old and the girl 14 years old. I remember when the boy was a toddler.  He was a little terror.  I  thought he would grow up the same way.

How wrong I was! These two are the best kids ever.  The whole time we were there not once I saw either kid with a cell phone.  They were talking to us, helping with dinner, playing with the dog. Such a pleasure!  We don’t see them often but every time we do, it is the same way.

The least well-behaved person was the husband.  I am kidding, but he is so stubborn and can be a bit of a know-it-all. It is often hard to have a conversation. At times I would just agree with whatever he was saying because it was just easier this way.  I blame it on him being an Aries.  I am an Aries, so I know I can be that way sometimes.  Still, he was and has always been a very nice host.

“Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable.”
 G.K. Chesterton

To drink we had sparkling wine.  The sushi looked great, as you can see by the picture below, but since I don’t eat sushi I had tacos and all the trimmings.  For dessert we brought over a delicious strawberry shortcake from a French bakery I like.  My friend also served cherry pie. All was delicious.

“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.” ― J.R.R. Tolkien

It was our first time seeing their dog.  Her name is Nela and she is only 6 months.  Since she is just a child, she is a just a big bundle of energy. I wish I lived in a house with a yard, I would definitely have my own Nela.

 “A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.”  Josh Billings

It was an awesome night. We always promise to see more of each other but for some reason, we don’t. It seems it is always an once a year thing.

“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” ― C.S. Lewis

This was February 2022 (peace is still a dream)

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Continuing my recap of 2022, this was February.  I am hoping to get the rest of 2022 done in the next couple of weeks.

“Freeing yourself was one thing, claiming ownership of that freed self was another.” ― Toni Morrison, Beloved

In February I gave notice to my tenant to move out.  It felt like freedom… momentarily. From the moment I gave notice to the moment he actually left it took several painful months.

I almost got scammed by the car dealership when I went in for an oil change. That experience taught me not to go to car dealerships for regular oil changes.

“Potential has a shelf life.” ― Margaret Atwood, Cat’s Eye

I went on a coffee date, looking more for a potential skiing partner than a romantic one.  One week later the date and I went skiing at Hunter Mountain.  We had a great time.  I thought we would remain in touch, but we didn’t.  We exchanged a few messages but then I just let it go.

“Don’t take anything Personally Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering” ― Don Miguel Ruiz

A lady at the mosaic studio was offended when I mentioned I was naming one of my mosaic pieces after her friend.  She felt her friend would be upset.  I learned how some people can be so sensitive, even if it is for something that has nothing to do with them.  I was upset for a moment and then realized it was not really about me. It was about this person’s own issues. She had been going through some grief.  I just let it go.

“Conduct yourself in a manner that is worthy of respect and don’t worry about what others think.” ― Bohdi Sanders, Men of the Code: Living as a Superior Man

The war in Ukraine started. The world feels even more fragile, uncertain and scary. Now, almost a year later it seems the world just got used to it.  How crazy is it that we can get used to everything in life, even a war?  The sad reality is, unless it personally affect us, life goes on.

As I write this, I am reading about the ugly protests in Brazil yesterday.  Actually that was not a protest.  Protests are peaceful.  That was an ugly, violent attack on our congressional buildings, on our symbols of justice and democracy.  It was like watching the January 6 Capitol scenes all over again.  I was very saddened but not surprised. Bolsonaro followed Trumps’s playbook to a T, and so did his followers.  I was surprised that the authorities were not prepared for it.

I pray for Ukraine.  I pray for Brazil.  I pray for the world.  I pray for peace and unity! May each person have more love in their heart for their fellow human being.

“The sadness of the world has different ways of getting to people, but it seems to succeed almost every time.” ― Louis-Ferdinand Céline, Journey to the End of the Night