Category Archives: Daily Life

Being blessed with seeing another year – 57 and it feels so good!

28 Tuesday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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“I grabbed a pile of dust, and holding it up, foolishly asked for as many birthdays as the grains of dust, I forgot to ask that they be years of youth. ” ― Ovid, Metamorphoses

Thank you all for your birthday wishes.  I don’t feel 57 at all.  Well, don’t ask my body.  Sometimes it feels like 107.  My mind keeps getting younger and younger.  

I knew my trip to Florida would be good and I was correct.  I have a lot to write about about Utah, and now about Florida, but will keep this short and write additional posts in the future.

M was the most gracious and caring host to my sister and I.  I asked him not to buy anything special as we would be there for only 2 days.  He didn’t listen.  He had all kinds of foods that he thought we would like. He had paid attention when he was at my home, and made sure to have some of the same things waiting for us.

There were various types of coffees, bagels and popcorn for my sister. For me it was cappuccino mix, oat milk, scones, macarons and Pellegrino water.  He also got prosecco, St. Germain, lemon and lime to make my sister’s favorite drink.

He also gave my sister and I a cute mug (the one above), along with a birthday card and an Amazon gift card.  I love that he gave my sister and I the same amount $100.00.  He has been gifting me things since I met him.  In Utah he gave me an electric hairbrush when I pointed  one out in a store and commented that mine was getting old.  This weekend we were talking about electric toothbrushes and he had one delivered to my house. 

“I was brought up to respect my elders, so now I don’t have to respect anybody.” ― George Burns

I am now very careful when talking about things. I don’t want him thinking I am hinting at him buying me stuff.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy him wanting to make me happy by getting me stuff, but it is not necessary.

On Friday night, he picked us up at Orlando Airport.  It was already late when we got to his house so we just had a drink and some cheese and crackers.  

He lives in a condo, townhouse style, in a golfing community in New Smyrna Beach.  He doesn’t golf.  He prefers surfing.

Saturday morning we enjoyed a breakfast of bagels and croissants.  We declined eggs.  After, we went to the beach.  It is a cool beach where one can drive the car on the beach.  That was a whole new experience to me. Supposedly there are sharks in these waters.  But apparently these are good sharks.  Is there such a thing?

I really wanted to feel the sun, so I used sunscreen on my face only. I think that my Brazilian skin never burns.  Wrong!  Burned cleavage anyone?  It turned out that it was one of the hottest days ever there.  Lesson learned. Always use sunscreen all over.

“I see birthdays as a reward for having shown up 365 in a row. It’s like getting a badge for attendance.” ― Gina Barreca

After the beach we stopped at a local favorite Joe’s Subs where we had fish sandwiches and burgers.  Then we went home to get ready for dinner.  We could have skipped lunch or dinner, but on vacation my sister and I forget all reason.

We had dinner at Norwood Restaurant and Treehouse Bar.  The food was great, but the drinks were awful. We ordered too much food.  That night my sister and I come to an agreement: no more ordering of appetizers when out to dinner. 

We got home and watched The Whale.  I fell sleep towards the end.  I woke up with M and my sister wanting their money back. It was great acting by Brendan Fraser, but we didn’t really like the movie.  Expectations, I guess we had too many.

“We do have funerals for the living,” Jill said. “They’re called birthday parties.” ― Andrew Shaffer, Hope Never Dies

On Sunday we had a late start and skipped the beach.  We drove his golf cart around the complex to get a tour.  Then we went to a small spiritual community called Cassadaga.  It has many psychics, healers and mediums. 

M knew I am interested in such things and wanted my sister and I to get a reading. It was interesting.  I will be talking about the reading in a future post.

After the reading, I chose Olive Garden for lunch.  I have never eaten there before.  We were passing by it, and I remember a friend mentioning that he loves their tiramisu.  It seemed like the perfect time to try it.

First thing we do at the restaurant?  Order appetizers!! We were pleasantly surprised with the food and drinks we got.  Everything was great.  And the tiramisu was indeed delicious.

We got back to his house, packed and got ready to go to the airport.  Our flight was delayed.  There were long lines. I try not to let those things bother me.  But my sister got a little stressed, worrying about getting home very late and having to get up early the next day.

As I am at the gate, I realized I didn’t have my carry-on. After being sent to different locations, I went back to the TSA screening and saw it on a table.  I had to wait for an officer to inspect and then was free to go.  In 40 years traveling it has never happened.  I told my sister it was her fault, she got me so frazzled and made me forget.  She smiled sheepishly, because she knows it is true.

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” ― Dr. Seuss, Happy Birthday to You!

We boarded, it was a quick flight, just a little over 2 hours.  Kristin Chenoweth was on my flight with her dog and her fiance.  She is a tiny little thing.  She was escorted to the plane first.  Everyone left her alone.  I am not sure a lot people recognized her.

My sister and I will be having a quiet birthday evening.  I will be getting her her favorite Black Forest cake, and also the Nutella cake from Martine’s Bakery.  I am thinking of getting Walter’s Hot Dogs for dinner.  

When my sister and I were discussing what to have for a special dinner, we realized, once again, how blessed we are.  We want for nothing.  

Tomorrow I am having dinner with my friend A.  Then Thursday dinner with my sister and another friend.

On Friday, guess who is boarding a flight to Florida again?

Life keeps getting better and better.  So infinitely blessed and thankful!

“A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.” ― Robert Frost

ps. Happy Birthday Lady Gaga!

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Where fear and happiness meet

24 Friday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me, Food

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“Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution.” ― Kahlil Gibran

Time is short, so here is a quick summary of my quick trip to Park City, Utah.

I had the most awesome time. M is the most thoughtful and caring guy I ever met. He was always making sure that everything was exactly how I wanted. I had to keep reminding him that it is not all about me. oh wait, it should be all about me 😉

And the mountains are just majestic!  A mixture of beauty, freedom and happiness permeates the air. And yes, a bit of fear and panic I get some times.

I arrived in Salt Lake City on Saturday, we spent the night there and drove to Park City the next day. No skiing on Sunday, just getting our equipment, getting to know the town, and getting to our charming 1-bedroom condo with a balcony and fireplace.
I had been to Park City in 2015, it was fun to remember some areas.

We skied only 2 days, Monday and Tuesday. On Monday I did okay. I still struggle with fear. The moment I pick up speed or it is a steeper hill I lose confidence. Still, I love it! I love the challenge; I love the freedom.

On Tuesday, while in line to get our skis M befriended an older man that is a ski instructor in a resort in Virginia. He offered to give me a few pointers. He spent the whole day teaching me. It is incredible to see how much I improved from one day to the next. I take lessons every time I go skiing, but this time I didn’t book any. This man was so helpful. His instructions really boosted my confidence.

We bought him lunch, and at the end of the day we gave him $100 as an appreciation.  We asked if we could buy him dinner.  He said it was not necessary, but accepted.

“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” ― Marcus Tullius Cicero

I had memorable meals, and forgettable meals. The memorable ones were at:
• Aqua Terra Steak Sushi in Salt Lake. The best ever! Everything about this restaurant was awesome. He had sushi, and salmon. I had the black cod. To drink I had the Golden Goose and he had the Garden Party. Best drinks ever! We shared a chocolate tart for dessert.
• 710 Bodega in Park City. We had a bunch of tapas, including patatas bravas, almondigas for me, shrimp for him, and others. To drink he had beer, I had the Laverstoke- I asked for vodka instead of gin. The waiter said no one ever asked for that before, but it was so delicious. For dessert we shared the Broken Pavlova -Yummy!
• Baan Thai Cuisine in Park City. We had noodles, spring rolls, sticky rice, and chicken satay (not my favorite, but still good). Lychee martini for me, beer for him. Great meal!

I bought my ticket to Salt Lake City, and he paid for everything else, lodging, lift tickets, meals, etc as my birthday present. The big 57 is on Tuesday. He even wanted to pay for the souvenirs I bought for my family. I didn’t let him do it, though. I felt it would be taking advantage of his kindness.

On Wednesday morning we left Park City and drove to Salt Lake City Airport. My flight was leaving first, his would take another 5 hours. He made a point of making sure to be there when I arrived and also when I left, even if it meant staying at the airport several more hours.

“Pursue what catches your heart, not what catches your eyes.” ― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

I got home Wednesday at 9:30pm. I worked Thursday, and part of today. At 5pm my sister and I are flying to his house in New Smyrna Beach, Florida for the weekend.

It is a quick trip, just as a trial to see how would this long distance relationship work.  He will be showing us around and also talking us to dinner for our birthdays (sis and I). He had offered to fly to NY to take us out to dinner on Tuesday, but I decided to go there this weekend instead.  

I remain very happy and excited about this blossoming relationship. I am afraid to talk too much about and jinx it.  I will be mentioning some additional details about Park City as time permits.

Stay tuned for the Florida report.

“It’s amazing how a little tomorrow can make up for a whole lot of yesterday.” ― John Guare

I have angels, you have angels, we all have angels!

16 Thursday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message

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“Be content not with your lot in life but with being here in the flow of life. The glories of creation are in your very cells; you are made of the same mindstuff as the angels, the stars, and god himself.” ― Deepak Chopra, The Book of Secrets: Unlocking the Hidden Dimensions of Your Life

By now, you know I believe in all things magical.  I believe in a lot things that cannot be proven. I don’t need to see it, or have any kind of proof, I feel them.  I believe in a powerful being, God, Universe, whatever name one chooses to use.  I believe in unicorns and fairy-tales. I believe in prayers and angels.

For the past several months, every day, it never fails that I see the same number repeating itself.  I mostly see 111 or 1111.  But also repeating 5s, and 2s.  Every time I see them, I smile and say a silent thank you.  I know I have angels around, guiding me and telling me I am in the right path.

Every time there is something happening in my life, such as an important meeting I need to attend or a medical procedure I need to go through, I will ask people close to me to send me angels. 

Yesterday I had a dental procedure scheduled for 2pm.  I asked my mother, my sister and M, to send me angels.

“When angels visit us, we do not hear the rustle of wings, nor feel the feathery touch of the breast of a dove; but we know their presence by the love they create in our hearts.” ― Mary Baker Eddy, Poems by Mary Baker Eddy

As I walk into the dentist’s waiting room just a few minutes before 2pm, I look on the ground and see what appears to be a little paper angel.   I couldn’t believe my eyes.  I picked it up and smiled.  My guardian angels wanted me to know that they really came.

It filled me with love and it was just a confirmation of how blessed I am; to be always surrounded by angels.  Not that I needed any confirmation.  

No, the procedure was not painless and it may not be 100% successful.  It was more painful than the last time, and there is a chance that I will need to do the left side again.  

But the point is, that I was not alone.  There will always be problems, pain, heartaches, curve balls, audits, dentist’s visits, but knowing I am never alone makes me feel I can take anything on and come out a winner. 

I now carry that little angel in my phone case.  I hope that you know that you are never alone.  At this moment I am sending angels to those who are in need of them.

“A person who goes in search of God is wasting his time. He can walk a thousand roads and join many religions and sects–but he’ll never find God that way. God is here, right now, at our side. We can see Him in this mist, in the ground we’re walking on, even in my shoes. His angels keep watch while we sleep and help us in our work. In order to find God, you have only to look around. But meeting Him is not easy. The more God asks us to participate in His mysteries, the more disoriented we become, because He asks us constantly to follow our dreams and our hearts. And that’s difficult to do when we’re used to living in a different way. Finally we discover, to our surprise, that God wants us to be happy, because He is the father.” ― Paulo Coelho, By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept

Just a dog with flowers on his hair, unfinished

14 Tuesday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Mosaic and other crafts

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“It’s just the most amazing thing to love a dog, isn’t it? It makes our relationships with people seem as boring as a bowl of oatmeal.” ― John Grogan, Marley and Me: Life and Love With the World’s Worst Dog

I was asked by my friend Andi (from https://coffeewithandi.com), if I make all my mosaics only at the studio or at home.

I make most of them at the studio.  It is easier there.  The materials are all there.  L. is there.  L. is the owner of the studio and the master of all things mosaic.  She is always ready to give her advice and direct us when she knows something should be done in a different way.

I have done some at home, before I found the studio.  I don’t have a lot materials at home, but it is fun being resourceful with what I have.  Most recently I have made the one of my sister.  Here: https://blessedwithastarontheforehead.com/2023/02/01/here-is-my-sister-well-something-like-that/

And just last week, I finished the little dog below.  Everything I did with this one is wrong, starting with using canvas.  It is a great lesson, in mosaics and in life.  We have to start with a good base, with firm ground.  Building on shaky ground may result in failure.

I had used canvas before but it had a frame around, so it was a bit more sturdy than this.  Of course I knew I shouldn’t have, but this stubborn Aries thought that she could get away with it.  I didn’t get away with it, as you can see.

As a result the grout keeps cracking.  Then I tried to use resin in middle, but didn’t have enough to cover it. It turns out that mosaics cannot be as forgiving as I thought.

Lesson learned.  I will attempt some corrections, but still, I am in love with this little dog.  It makes me smile when I look at him. 
 

 
“You can say any fool thing to a dog and the dog will just give you this look that says, ‘My GOSH, you’re RIGHT! I NEVER would’ve thought of that!” ― Dave Barry

“They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation. ” ― Jerome K. Jerome

“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” ― Ann Landers

   “They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation. ” ― Jerome K. Jerome

“I’m suspicious of people who don’t like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn’t like a person.” ― Bill Murray

    “I believe in integrity. Dogs have it. Humans are sometimes lacking it.” ― Cesar Millan

  “Once you have had a wonderful dog, a life without one, is a life diminished.” ― Dean Koontz, A Big Little Life: A Memoir of a Joyful Dog

  “Slowly, Anna put up a hand to his muzzle and began to scratch that spot behind the ear where large dogs keep their souls.” ― Eva Ibbotson, A Countess Below Stairs

“The dog’s agenda is simple, fathomable, overt: I want. “I want to go out, come in, eat something, lie here, play with that, kiss you. There are no ulterior motives with a dog, no mind games, no second-guessing, no complicated negotiations or bargains, and no guilt trips or grudges if a request is denied.” ― Caroline Knapp

Should I keep it under the mattress?

12 Sunday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message

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“There is only one kind of shock worse than the totally unexpected: the expected for which one has refused to prepare.” ― Mary Renault, The Charioteer

My week was going well… until Friday.  I was planning on leaving earlier,  getting some chores done, and that way having a lighter weekend.  But as they say: “man plans, God laughs”.

Instead, it turned into a busy, stressful day.  You may have heard about the Silicon Valley Bank collapse.  While we don’t bank there, we bank at another bank that it is next to them on the list of troubled banks.

We don’t don’t know if there is a real reason to panic, but we are worried and can’t afford to wait and see.  So we had to scramble and open other bank accounts, transfer money, etc.  It was not until after 7pm that we had some of the money fully transferred.  

Now, in the next week, we will have to decisions to make regarding payroll accounts, invoicing accounts, customers notification, and a bunch of other things that will come into play.

I feel bad for the people and companies that had money in that bank.  I cannot even imagine what we would do if we were in that situation.

“The phrase ‘travelling towards uncertainty’ is unnecessary because all journeys are always towards uncertainty! Why? Because there is no certainty even after a second!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan

This situation highlights how fragile the US economy really is,  and how easy could topple.  These are my feelings.  I have been told that, perhaps, I have not been paying attention, the economy has been shaky for the past 15 years.  Others, want to assure me that there is no reason to panic, that the economy is cyclical and it will all turn around. 

It is true that I have never been as interested in the state of the US economy as much as I have now.  All of a sudden the idea of retiring sooner, rather than later, is a current thought in my mind.  Well, it is not all of a sudden, the idea of working less has been brewing as the years are going by.   

As I have been talking about retirement more and more, with friends here online and IRL, I have been thinking of how to make that idea a reality.  And also, to come up with a date, with an age where I say good bye to working for a paycheck.  

60 seems like a nice real number to aim for.   And when I say retirement, I don’t mean stopping work, I mean working just as much or as little as I wish.  I want to be the owner of my time.  I want to be the boss of all my hours and be accountable only to myself.

“Whether it is good or evil, whether life in itself is pain or pleasure, whether it is uncertain-that it may perhaps be this is not important-but the unity of the world, the coherence of all events, the embracing of the big and the small from the same stream, from the same law of cause, of becoming and dying.” ― Hermann Hesse, Siddhartha

How much money do I need to have to be able to retire? Where should I keep that retirement money?  What about health insurance?  It seems that is one of the main costs.  If the state of the economy is a concern, don’t get me started on the state of health insurance.

Another major consideration is where to retire.  Retiring in Westchester County, New York, may not be the way to go.  Should I move to another state, go back to Brazil, or to another country?

Still, no matter how bad the economy is, not matter how bad things are, I feel blessed to have choices. Having always lived below my means has afforded me to be able to actually be thinking about retirement.  I know a lot people that will not be able to retire even when retirement age hits.

Spend wisely, live simply, have fun.

“The business of philosophy is to teach man to live in uncertainty… not to reassure him, but to upset him.” ― Lev Shestov, All Things are Possible

This will be a crazy busy week for me.  Besides all the financial issues at work, I will be facing another dental scaling and root planning.  Half of my mouth was done 2 weeks ago, the other half will be done this week.  Not fun and not cheap, but I have  had worst procedures done in the past, more painful and more expensive, so it is all good.

Now for the fun part, I will be packing for my skiing trip that happens at the end of the week!  Yippie – Park City here we come.

And, 2 days after I return,  I will be going away for another couple of days… I will save the details for a next post… I am also very excited about it.

Life is tricky, maneuvering the sometimes long winding roads can be difficult. But it is all so worth the effort, when the scenery is so amazing.

I want to wish you all a blessed new week, full of miracles and reasons to smile! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your energy and comments!

“Is the road ahead uncertain? Great, be happy! Uncertainty means surprises, and if the path you’re walking on isn’t one full of surprises, you’ll get bored! When you get bored, your life energy goes out! Walk in uncertainty, encounter new things just like an explorer and they will keep you energetic!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan

 

They are yellow, but they can also be red. They love the sun, and they make my heart sing!

09 Thursday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating

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“All this was new to me. Life takes us by surprise and orders us to move towards the unknown – even when we don’t want to and we think we don’t need to.” ― Paulo Coelho

I arrived home yesterday and there was this huge flower box waiting for me by the door. I suspected was from M. 

 And it was.  He knows that I love sunflowers and daisies. So, to celebrate International Women’s Day he sent me 10 beautiful sunflowers.

I am so happy with his care and attention.  Everything he says and does, makes me feel not only wanted, but cherished and safe.

There is only one detail with the beautiful flowers.  Each flower should have been protected by netting, as per the description inside the box.  Because they were not, some were damaged.  I didn’t tell him that, but I want to give him a tip when ordering flowers again.

Since I have been disappointed,more than once, with 1800Flowers, I now search for a florist in the area where I am sending to.  I get a local florist and get flower arrangements done with attention and care. 

Would you say something, or just leave it alone? I don’t want to appear ungrateful.

“I have been finding treasures in places I did not want to search. I have been hearing wisdom from tongues I did not want to listen. I have been finding beauty where I did not want to look. And I have learned so much from journeys I did not want to take. Forgive me, O Gracious One; for I have been closing my ears and eyes for too long. I have learned that miracles are only called miracles because they are often witnessed by only those who can can see through all of life’s illusions. I am ready to see what really exists on other side, what exists behind the blinds, and taste all the ugly fruit instead of all that looks right, plump and ripe.” ― Suzy Kassem

Maya Angelou: Phenomenal Woman

08 Wednesday Mar 2023

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Happy International Women’s Day! March 8, 2023

To the phenomenal woman in you, I salute you!

Please take the day to celebrate all the beautiful women around you, international or otherwise. Tell them how much you love them, and how much better off your life is with them in it.

Chocolate and flowers are allowed.  Even recommended 😉

“Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
‘Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.”
― Maya Angelou, Phenomenal Woman: Four Poems Celebrating Women

Why did the chicken cross the road?

03 Friday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Mosaic and other crafts

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“I dream of a better tomorrow. One where chickens can cross the road and their motives remain unquestioned.” ― Anonymous

I am not sure if I made a chicken, a hen or a rooster.  It didn’t come out as I intended. But then again, most of my pieces never do.  They always end up very different from my original idea.  Still, I love them all.

 

“Roads are no place for naive chickens dreaming of nirvana.”
― Shalom Auslander, Hope: A Tragedy 

“She entered with ungainly struggle like some huge awkward chicken, torn, squawking, out of its coop.”
― Arthur Conan Doyle, The Case-Book of Sherlock Holmes

“Alvin smiled back, and kissed her. “People talk about fools counting chickens before they hatch. That’s nothing. We name them.” ― Orson Scott Card, Alvin Journeyman 

“If I didn’t start painting, I would have raised chickens.”
― Grandma Moses

“Ah, that is interesting! Are there chickens?”
“No.”
“Nothing is perfect,” sighed the fox.”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

 

Weekend date: Part II – Saturday

01 Wednesday Mar 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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“If I want a long boring story with no point to it, I have my life.” ― Jerry Seinfeld

Here is the rest of my weekend date with M – I need to think of a nickname for him.

On Saturday morning I went to the mosaic studio.  I had missed the prior Saturday because my date from Boston was here. I didn’t want to miss it again.

The plan was for me to decide on something fun for us to do afterwards. He had made some suggestions, but I was undecided.

When I left the studio at around 12:30 I called him and said I would stop by the hotel and pick him up.  He said not to worry that he would drive over.  I assured him that the hotel was on my way home. That way he didn’t need to deal with parking.

“Let’s face it: a date is a job-interview, that lasts all night. The only difference between a date and a job interview is: not many job-interviews is there a chance you’ll end up naked at the end of it. ”― Jerry Seinfeld

My sister joined us for a late breakfast (or early lunch) of Brazilian cheese bread, bagels, papaya, yogurt, pound cakes (marble and chocolate), etc, peppered with a lot laughs. His sense of humor matched my sister’s and I. We played Wordle, quoted Seinfeld, taught him a few words in Portuguese, etc.

After the meal, we went to my sister’s apartment and helped her change some light bulbs.  We came back to my apartment and I was still thinking of where to go in the afternoon.  I thought of some parks, museums or even a ski store, as I have skiing in my mind.  In the end I decided against all of those.

It was just the perfect day to stay at home.  I asked if he would mind if we just watched a movie and then later go out to dinner.  He said that it was a great idea. I proposed we watch Shawshank Redemption, one of my favorite movies that he hadn’t seen it yet.

“Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason” ― Jerry Seinfeld

After the movie, it was already after 6pm, and I was starving.  I chose to go to a place near my home that I had never been to before, Krave, a Caribbean style restaurant.

We shared cod fish fritters, salmon with green beans and mashed potato and fried rice. We took macaroni and cheese home for my sister. We both had wine, him red, I chose white. I almost had the coconut rum cake for dessert, but decided it would be too much. I should have taken to go… oh well.

After dinner, we stopped by my sister’s apartment to drop off the macaroni and cheese.  We chatted for a little while, then came back to my place and watched a couple of episodes of Schitt’s Creek while snuggling on the couch.

I drove him back to the hotel around 10:30.  We said good bye, as he was leaving for the airport early the next morning.

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin” ― Shawshank Redemption

Next time he comes to New Rochelle, I will make better plans.  Still this was perfect, easy, comfortable and fun. There are sparks, but it is not the crazy, exploding fireworks I have been looking for.  It was more like a slow burn, comfortable, familiar, attentive and romantic. One word to describe it, that it is pretty much unexpected for me is: mature. It feels adult, grown up.

We will be seeing each other next at the Salt Lake City Airport.  We will meet up there and drive to Park City to spend a few days skiing. I can’t wait!  He booked the place to stay and bought the lift tickets yesterday. I just booked my flights. I wanted to pay for my lift tickets, but he said it is my early birthday gift.  I am turning 57 on March 28 – arghhh… where has all of those years gone?

This, whatever this is, feels promising, feels good.

“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things.
And no good thing ever dies!” ― Shawshank Redemption

Weekend Date – Part I

27 Monday Feb 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 34 Comments

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“It is an absolute human certainty that no one can know his own beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring human being.” ― John Joseph Powell, The Secret of Staying in Love

Hi friends,

Here is the first part of my weekend date update.  I had a good reason to be excited.  He was just one of the sweetest, most thoughtful man that I ever met.

M. is 60 years old.  He is a retired helicopter pilot.  He retired at 55 years old.  He lives simply and planned his life so that he was able to retire early. He has spent the last 5 years skiing, surfing and traveling.

He arrived at 2pm on Thursday and went to his hotel. I was at work, so we met at 6:30pm at the hotel restaurant, Noma.  He met me outside.  I could tell right away that he was very shy.

Later he confessed that he checked on YouTube how do Brazilians greet each other.  I thought it was cute that he was trying to know exactly what to do. He also signed up with Rosetta Stone and is learning Portuguese. Extra points. Also, the moment I met him, he asked me to take a picture of his Drivers License and send it to my sister so she would know who I was with it.

The restaurant was great, busy and lively.  At some point there was a lady teaching salsa, and clearly there were a lot couples that went there just for that.  For dinner we had several tapas dishes.  I had a passion-fruit mojito, he had a beer.  We shared the bread pudding for dessert.

Throughout dinner and after, while sitting at a couch on the lobby, we talked like old friends.  We stayed in the lobby for about 30 minutes.  He reminded me that it was a school night and wanted to drive me home.  I wanted to walk.  He was not happy that I wanted to walk alone at night, but I assured him that it was safe.  It was still not that late.

Next day, Friday, I had originally intended on taking the day off, but there was some work I wanted to finish.  I decided to work half day from home, and meet him after.  Eventually I called him and proposed that he comes to my apartment and we have a late breakfast/lunch here. That way I would be logged into work for awhile longer.

He came over, we made a quick trip to the bakery, then returned, had some food.  I did some office work while we continued to talk. Then we decided to go out and do something.  It was so cold and windy, not the greatest day to be out, but we wanted to get out of the house. 

He kept asking if there was anything I always wanted to do, or any place I always wanted to see.  I came out blank, but so appreciate him trying to please me. He had a list of places, but by this time it was already 3:30, so I figured it was too late for any long drive.

I suggested we take a drive to Untermeyer Park and Gardens. We got there at 4pm.  It was definitely not the right day and time for a visit, but it is a gorgeous place no matter what.  It was empty, and the gate was closed, but not locked.  We walked around for about 45 minutes.  Then I remembered that I thought I had seen online that the park closes at 4:30pm.  We joked that we may get locked in.

We hurried to leave, but of course, we get to the gate and it is locked.  A bit of panic sets in, as it would be getting dark soon.  He started looking around for a way to either jump the wall, or some other area that we get through.  I called 911. 

As I am speaking to the dispatcher, M. comes over and noticed a notice on the wall, that had 2 numbers to call if ever locked in.  I told the dispatcher and she said: “Call the number, and if there is no answer call me back.”

As I called one number, he called the other.  I reached a mailbox that was full.  The number that he dialed connected him to 911.  At that same moment I saw through the gate that a security guard was coming towards us.

M. said: “I am going to give him $20”. I said, yes please, but only if he is not angry or mean.  He was not.  He had a smile on his face, and asked if we had not heard him on the loudspeaker.  We had not.  He didn’t want to take the tip, but we insisted.  

We returned to my town and stopped at the train station to get my sister.  We went home and got changed for dinner.  He took my sister and I to my sister’s favorite restaurant, Sergio’s.  We let her choose the place.

On the way there I realize I was missing my phone.  We dropped my sister at the restaurant and returned to my apartment to look for my phone.

Luckily, my phone was sitting on the table where I had left. We returned to the restaurant and found my sister seated at a table enjoying a cosmopolitan and bread and butter.  We had such a wonderful dinner full of fun conversation and laughter.

We had calamari and eggplant rollatini as appetizers. M. had the branzino with broccoli rabe. My sister had shrimp scampi with risotto.  I had eggplant with angel hair.  For dessert, my sister took a cheesecake home. 

Everything about Thursday and Friday was easy and fun.  Nothing awkward or difficult.  There were sparks, but also there was no pressure or pushiness for anything.  He is shy and very respectful.  He has made it clear that it is all 100% up to me; that he is not in any hurry.  I am enjoying concentrating on building this friendship and exploring the potential here.

He liked me.. a lot! He couldn’t stop making it clear to me that he was interested in a long term relationship.  The fact that he is retired and has nobody depending on him is a major plus for me.  Unlike the guy from Boston, he is able to come and go at a moment’s notice.  Speaking of the guy from Boston, he wants to schedule the second date for March.  I don’t think I  will be going on a second date with him.   He is so great, but with 2 young kids, everything will be more difficult for the next 8 to 10 years.

Weekend date part II next…

“To him she seemed so beautiful, so seductive, so different from ordinary people, that he could not understand why no one was as disturbed as he by the clicking of her heels on the paving stones, why no one else’s heart was wild with the breeze stirred by the sighs of her veils, why everyone did not go mad with the movements of her braid, the flight of her hands, the gold of her laughter. He had not missed a single one of her gestures, not one of the indications of her character, but he did not dare approach her for fear of destroying the spell.” ― Gabriel García Márquez, Love in the Time of Cholera