Daily Archives: April 30, 2012

Exes are like old clothes!

30 Monday Apr 2012

Posted by in EX Files, Finding Me

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Exes are like old clothes that no longer fits us.

You know it does not fit you. Perhaps it is old and ripped, perhaps it is too small or hopefully too large, perhaps it is a style that it will never come back again.  Whatever the reason maybe, there is a reason why those articles of clothing have been put aside and rarely looked at it.

It takes space in your closet and it is a constant reminder of some other time.  And every now and then, perhaps when you are about to actually donate or put it in trash, you get nostalgic and think of all the emotional attachment, how you were that on your 30th birthday, or you bought it in Thailand and therefore irreplaceable, or how you got a compliment when you were it.

Whatever the reason may be you once again put it on, only to confirm that it looks awful, feels awful, or perhaps after you use you get a rash from the cheap material.  There is nothing good about it.  So are you going to get rid of it or put it back in the closet to revisit it at some point?

That is exactly what I was doing with Ex.  Revisiting it time and time again.  Thanks Heavens and the Universe that I woke up and realize that no good can come from going back there.

The truth is deep down inside I still thought and hoped that it would work.  I was willing to forget and forgive everything, thinking that love conquers all.

Love conquers all when there is love.  Lust doesn’t conquer all.  Lust gives you great moments, but that is it!

So glad, so relieved, so thankful that I no longer have hopes that there is a future for Ex and I.  So grateful that now I can look at him and think he will be a friend (if he is lucky), but that is it!

That realization is priceless.  It is a huge stumbling block being lifted from my path.

So, forget about old clothes, donate, sell, give it away.  Make space for new and better clothes.  You are not the same person anymore.  You are better and deserve better!

Don’t get stuck in the past!! Move on!!

Are you stuck in repeating patterns?  Are you stuck in the past, still refusing to give up?

Shuttle Enterprise lands in NY

30 Monday Apr 2012

Posted by in Daily Life

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As I may have mentioned, or not, my mom spent almost 1 month with me in NY.  She went back to Brazil on April 27, 2012. I took her to the airport around 7pm.  Her flight was scheduled for 10:30pm, but, having had missed flights before due to traffic problems, we leave home with plenty of time.

So we approached JFK at 7:10pm and  we were all surprised to see the Shuttle Enterprise just sitting there on one of the hangars. I almost missed it, if it were not for the driver pointing it out to me. (Yeah I really need to work on my being in the moment and paying attention to my surroundings)

It was sitting piggyback on a jumbo jet. It seemed smaller than one would expect, but I guess it is because I was riding in car looking out of the window.

After being in JFK for awhile, the shuttle will be moved permanently to Intrepid, Sea, Air and Space Museum in New York City

Review Restaurant Sweet Potatoes (4 1/2 stars)

30 Monday Apr 2012

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So finally I was able to go to Sweet Potatoes, located in New Rochelle, NY.

We (Ex, his mom and I) got there around 5:30. The place is tiny with only 4 tables.  We were lucky that there was 1 table empty. The table needed to be cleared, but we went ahead and sat.  The waitress came and changed the tablecloth. I joked with the mom that I needed my iron because the tablecloth was so wrinkled.

But anyway, that is a minor detail, the important is food and service.

I ordered the fried chicken with collard greens and steak fries.  Ex ordered the fried catfish and sweet potatoes fries. Mom ordered friend shrimp with macaroni and cheese and candied yams.

We were pleasantly surprised that we were served a delicious green salad with a delicious dressing.  We were even more pleasantly surprised when after the salad we were served some yellow rice with 1 fried shrimp, 1 crab cake and some chicken strips as appetizers.

The entrees came and were huge and I have to say delicious. If I were to complain about something it would be that I wish that after frying the friend stuff that they would lay the food on paper towel  to soak up some of the oil first.  Ex pointed out that perhaps they did.

We brought 3 desserts home, peach cobbler, apple cobbler and sweet potato pie. I haven’t tried any of those yet.  Honestly those types of desserts normally don’t do anything for me.

The owner of the restaurant took us 3 doors down where he took over the space where used to be a barbershop and made it a lounge/restaurant. It is beautiful and cozy.

If you ever have a chance to visit Sweets Potatoes, you will not regret it. I give it 4 and a half stars (out of 5)

“She likes it!”

30 Monday Apr 2012

Posted by in EX Files, Finding Me

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Today Ex came over to show his mom my new place and to go out to dinner.

I had mixed feelings.  I love Mom and really wanted her to see my place, but I question seeing Ex often and its effect on me.

Since I had the confirmation of yet another woman in his life and how he is already celebrating anniversaries with her, because as he told me: “She likes it”.  With those 3 little words, he killed all the respect that I have ever had for him.  It was like I was punched in the stomach.  Since then, I have been putting all my efforts into forgetting I have ever loved him as a partner.  I am, for the sake of everyone, including me and the moms, trying to love him as a friend.

So, he came over, I showed mom my apartment and we went to dinner at Sweet Potatoes in New Rochelle, NY.  I will post the review on a following post.

On meeting him I made sure to avoid his lips and gave him a peck on the cheek and a quick hug.  I am sure he was a little taken aback by my not giving him a kiss on the lips and a tight hug.

We went to dinner and enjoyed very much and had pleasant talk about a variety of subjects.  Then we returned to my apartment and he attempted to help my put together my sound system.

He got some part working, and I was grateful for that, then they got ready to leave. Mom and I hugged and kissed and it was his turn and I tried avoiding his lips and tight hug, but his lips touched mine.

Still not sure how I feel about that kiss. Actually I know, I felt nothing. I think the spell is broken and I will be able to move on.  I am glad that my resolve to not have any romantic or sexual contact with him continues and continues very strong.

Every time I feel my resolve weaken I think of those 3 little words: “She likes it”.