Tag Archives: dental implants

Skiing before it is too late

20 Saturday Mar 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating

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“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
― Frank Herbert, Dune

On Saint Patrick’s Day I took the day off to go skiing.  My sister and I went to a little Mountain called Thunder Ridge, located in Patterson, NY. 

I didn’t want another season to go by without being on skis. I also wanted my sister to try it for the first time. She did and she didn’t care for it.  Too cumbersome, too dangerous.  I get it.  To start skiing at this age of 54 can be scary. 

She got an instructor that was awful.  Hopefully she will try again next season.

I am still terrified by skiing and yet, still so enamored by it. I love being there in the snow.  I like the whole skiing environment.  I am still afraid, but continue to love and embrace the challenge. 

“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” ― Joseph Campbell

Will I ever be comfortable skiing? I don’t know.  What I know is that I will never give up trying.

In my mind I know what I need to do.  I know I am capable.  I know the mountains and trails I have skied before.  Why do I get worst and not better?

I know I need more practice, more time on skis; so I am going to continue trying, Next season I am going to try to go often.

I am thinking of getting one of those multiple mountains passes, either the Ikon or the Epic.  Do any of you ever get those?

***

I had a follow up visit with the dentist yesterday.  He said that the pain I was feeling for 8 days was normal because he was really aggressive in trying to clean the area affected after he removed the implant.   All is looking as well as it should.  The plan is to wait another 3 months, take x-rays and then decide what to do:  put in another implant or leave it alone.

I have a date tonight with a new guy.  Stay tuned for the report next time.

Thank you for reading and wishing you all a blessed weekend! ♥♥

“If you are pained by external things, it is not they that disturb you, but your own judgement of them. And it is in your power to wipe out that judgement now.” ― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

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Pizza for Peace and Regenerating Gums

25 Sunday Aug 2019

Posted by in Daily Life, Finding Me

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For the ones following up on my office saga:

Yesterday, the guy I had the argument with bought pizza for the office.  I knew about it but I didn’t get up to get it.  He then send me a chat message saying: “I got pizza for the office if you would like some”.

I could have ignored his message, but instead I replied: “Sure, Thank you.”

I am not sure if our fight had anything to do with his sudden generosity. I want to believe that something I said was heard.

I think pizza was his olive branch.  I accepted it.

“Man looks very coward and extremely primitive with an ostentatious big sword and he looks very brave and tremendously sophisticated with a humble olive branch!”  ― Mehmet Murat ildan

***
After lunch I went to the dentist to get a cleaning and to get an x-ray on that dental implant problem I have written about it.  Last time I was there after the laser surgery I had had a few months earlier to try to save the implant the x-ray showed that the situation had gotten worse.

At that time his recommendation was to remove one of the implants, otherwise I may lose all 3.  It is the last one in the back so according to my dentist I would not feel too much of a difference.  Still I think he felt my despair at the idea of removing it that he offered to redo the laser surgery for free and go in deeper this time.

The second surgery was done in February. It was painful but I am used to painful dental surgeries.  Since February I am doing all I can to make sure that the surgery would be successful.

On Friday when he looked at the x-ray I braced myself.  He studied it for a second and then gave me the good news. Not only it didn’t get worst, it actually showed a little improvement.  That was enough for him to decide that I can hold off on removing the implant for now, and perhaps for good.

He said:  Continue doing what you are doing because it is working.  Here is what I am doing:

  • Eating less sugar (this is good for overall health)
  • Brushing my teeth after every meal, and specially after having sugar
  • Flossing at least once a day. Often twice.
  • I alternate among different toothpastes.  I am not sure why I do this, but I don’t like to use the same one every day. Some of the ones I use are: Sensodyne, Total, Arm and Hammer and CloSYS.
  • Gargling with CloSYS mouthwash or with Tree Tea Oil Mouthwash every night.
  • Doing Oil Pulling at least 3 times a week.  I should do it every day, but I don’t always remember it.
  • Using a dental tartar scraper once a week.  That is like a metal toothpick to scrape the tartar off the teeth.  The same one dentists use.
  • Massaging my gums with my finger as often as I remember.
  • Having a positive and grateful attitude towards my teeth and gums.

I believe that anything in our bodies can be regenerated, and that includes my gums.  I am not sure what is really working from the above list, but I will continue to do it all and continue hoping for good news at every visit.

“As wave is driven by wave
And each, pursued, pursues the wave ahead,
So time flies on and follows, flies, and follows,
Always, for ever and new. What was before
Is left behind; what never was is now;
And every passing moment is renewed.” 
― Ovid, Metamorphoses

 

Dates, friends and the whatnots

24 Thursday May 2018

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, EX Files, Finding Me

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Dental Issues: I had a laser treatment called Lapip done to try to save a couple of implants I have. I had several shots of local anesthesia so other than the pain of the needle there was only minor discomfort afterwards. Now, fingers crossed and invoking the help of angels, I pray that it will work. Otherwise I will need to return and have the implant(s) removed. Please send me a positive vibe. 🙂

Cheating?
Not even close. My married pal and I have been keeping the texting strictly platonic.   We haven’t texted much, but when we do it, it is mostly fun and platonic.

In the beginning it seemed that things would veer off the friendship course and into the sexual realm. Incredibly and happily, they did not.

I realized that I can be quite an instigator. Once I started paying more attention to what I was saying/writing and staying away from innuendos, he caught on and toned things down also.

“It is always important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over.”  – Paulo Coelho

It was good for me to realize that I needed to take accountability for my actions and to realize that it was all up to me.  I am not a victim, this time or ever.

It feels good to just be friendly without the added pressure of wondering if it will go any further.

Trips down memory lane are a waste of time and energy. They don’t add anything to my present or future. It glamorizes a time that perhaps it was not even that great, but the absence of it makes it appear so.

“Yet in opinions look not always back,–
Your wake is nothing, mind the coming track;
Leave what you’ve done for what you have to do;
Don’t be “consistent,” but be simply true.” – 
― Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. 

Friends with Benefits?
Not really full benefits, just a little perk every now and then.

Last Thursday my doctor friend and I got together again for dinner. This time it was just food, drinks and conversation.  We went to Rio Bravo in Larchmont, NY.  It was late and all the other places we wanted to go to were already closing their kitchens.  That is the problem with the suburbs… the kitchens close at 9:30.  The food and service was great.

We normally talk about everything, life, philosophy, spiritualism, etc.  Sometimes there is flirting, sometimes there is not.  This time there was no flirting or kissing.  It was equally fun.  I enjoy his company period.

I don’t think many people would understand it, but so far it works for us.   The deep, meaningful conversations is what I treasure most.  Kissing may happen or may not, and it hardly makes a difference.

“There can be no life without change, and to be afraid of what is different or unfamiliar is to be afraid of life.” – Theodore Roosevelt

I know, it is still crazy for me that I am okay with that.  It is crazy to discover this new side of me.  I normally like thinks defined, black or white, yes or no.  To find out that I am perfectly okay with this situation is freeing.

I think it works because, not only I don’t expect anything more than what it is, I don’t want it either.  I like things just the way they are.

This feels exactly like what freedom should taste like. There is this calm, no pressure, no expectation and I love it!!

“Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.” – Anthony Robbins

Dating?
Some.

Last Monday I met the Nature/Science writer.  We went to Wine 34, a fun, as the name would indicate, wine bar on 34th street. The food and drinks were great. He is very smart and loves to talk so there was no silent moments.  There was no hint of romantic chemistry for me.  He wants a second date. I didn’t give a final answer yet, but I think there will be no second date.  I don’t want to waste his or my time. And even worst, I don’t want to give him false hope.

Last night I finally met the realtor that I have been speaking to for the past couple of months.  I give him credit for his patience and not giving up.  We went to Favela Cubana near Washington Square Park.  As the name would hint at, the food was Brazilian and Cuban.  Some dishes were good, but the pao de queijo was awful. My date had 3 Bloody Marys and a gin and tonic. I had a passion fruit caipirinha and then I tried a drink made with St. Germain, which is a liquor that I enjoy.  They were both good.

He was a very nice guy and the jury is still out on if there will be a second date or not, but I am leaning towards not.  He kissed me, a quick peck on the lips and that was okay.  But then he just kept wanting to kiss me again.  There is nothing more annoying to me than to keep saying no to someone.  What is the rush?  I hate feeling pressured.

The data architect is still in the picture.  We haven’t met again due to our conflicting schedules.  I don’t detect romance but he is just such a nice person and with all this texting we have become friends.  I think I will meet again and see what happens.

“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.” – Albert Einstein

of holidays, gratitude and resolutions

28 Thursday Dec 2017

Posted by in Daily Life, Finding Me, Food

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I hope you all had a fun Christmas with family and friends, or alone.  I spent it alone and it was perfect.  I used to lie about spending holidays alone so I wouldn’t have to endure the pity on people’s faces.

I am alone at holidays for the same reason I am alone in life.  I don’t want to settle! My family lives in another country and I often don’t travel there on holidays.  I guess I also can be sensitive when it comes to invitations.  If someone wants you at their house they should say so, instead of saying something like: “What are you doing on Christmas? If you are not doing anything and want to come over”.  What kind of invitation is that?  To me that it is not an invitation, so I don’t even consider it.

Please don’t you feel sorry for me.  Feel envious of me. I stayed in pajamas the whole day. I had cookies for breakfast. I worked with mosaics with the TV on on some Lifetime feel good movie.  I would rather be skiing, but this was pretty good too.

Now let’s see what New Year’s eve and day will bring.

“You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.” – Max Ehrmann

***
An update on my dental issues, or what I thought were dental issues. This afternoon I am going to see an ENT doctor. It has been over 1 month since my dental surgery and I still feel the same way: gums feel weird, a pressure on the left side of the face. It is not a bad pain, it is an annoying pain, a pressure, a constant reminder that something is off.  At times if feels as if the nerves in the gum are wiggling, like something is brewing under the skin.  When I have that feeling I think good thoughts and I picture my gums growing. I am betting on the power of the mind.

I started a whole program of supplements that my Naturophatic doctor friend prescribed me with the intentions of stimulating the growth of my gums.  When gums start receding they don’t grow back.  I am intent on trying my best to stimulate them to regenerate themselves or at the very least prevent any further recession.  Nothing is impossible to those that believe.

It is the first time that I am hoping to hear from a doctor that something is wrong. If I have a diagnoses then I can start the process of getting it fixed.  Otherwise I am back to square one, returning to the dentist.  I wonder if the surgery I had was even necessary.  The dentist said he saw nothing wrong in the x-ray.  I don’t want to be a guinea pig, specially when my gums/teeth is concerned.

I had this implant done probably 10 years ago.  I will save the story of how I lost that tooth for a following post.  I had to get bone grafts and gum grafts.  Once the implant was put in it didn’t look right as the gum refused to be on top of it.  Crying I asked the dentist why he didn’t tell me that there was the chance of not working.  He said that it works on everyone.  I said:  I am not everyone.  When it comes to my teeth it is always the worst case scenario.

I went to 2 specialists at that time and they both said that there was nothing that could be done. I remember crying in the dentist’s chair.  At that point I returned to the original dentist (still my current dentist) who repeated the procedure and made it look a little better.

The number one compliment I get on my pictures online is on my smile. That should have been a clue that it didn’t actually look that bad!  People focused on the happiness and not on the perfection of my teeth.

This recent surgery caused the gum over the implant and an adjacent tooth to recede it even more.   Now I would give anything to be back to the way things were before.  There is a huge lesson here:  Be grateful for all you have, even the things that perhaps you are not 100% happy with.  Things can change and be taken away from you in a second.

in Brazil we have a saying:  “Eu era feliz e nao sabia”.  The translation means : ” I was happy and didn’t know it”.  We say that when we want to tell someone to appreciate what they have instead of just complaining and wanting more.

Just a thought: Is there anything in your life that you should be grateful for instead of complaining about?

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” – Epicurus

***

The New Year provides everyone a chance to shed the old and embrace the new.  Some people make resolutions and come up with lists and plans to improve their bodies, lives, etc.

I don’t make New Years resolutions, not because I don’t have anything to improve on or because I don’t have anything I want to change, but because I feel I am constantly thinking of changes.  My life is a constant list of improvements.  I make resolutions every night as I lay down to sleep and think about my day and everything I want to change about it.

And every time I do that I realize that resolutions never work.  Next evening I will be thinking about the same issues and resolving to make a change.  It is a vicious cycle.  I believe that if you want to make a change, the time to do it is now, not some time in the future. Scheduling changes rarely work.

Start whatever you want to change now.  Start living the life you want now.

I am guilty of not accomplishing things that I plan to start in the future.  Things that I stick to and see to completion are things that I resolved and started on that very moment the decision was made.

I once gave up chocolate for one year. A fact that shocked everyone as I used to be a chocoholic. I started on a Friday afternoon. Ex looked at me and after laughing at my crazy idea proposed that I should start on Monday. I said I have to do it now or I will never do it.  I am proud to say that for one entire year I had no chocolate of any kind.  If I had scheduled to start on Monday I would never have done.

With all that being said I do have plans for 2018.  I want a simpler 2018. I want to simplify,minimize and declutter my home, my office, my life.  I want less of anything material.  But I have already started that process.  I am attacking my closet like I have never done it before.  Unlike I have done in the past I am not just shuffling things around and making little difference.  This time I am being really drastic about it.

I always like organization and cleaning . I feel lighter, it is cathartic and empowering. As it is I don’t normally hoard anything, but I have realized that I have candles, wine, perfume, underwear, some clothing, some shoes, etc, all waiting for a perfect occasion.

The special occasion is now, the important person it is me!!

Tomorrow may never come and if it does I will go out and buy what I need, or even better, the Universe is always one step ahead of me and it provides me with everything I need when I need it.

“Good resolutions are like babies crying in church. They should be carried out immediately.” -Charles M. Sheldon

The writer, the Korean and the dentist

18 Saturday Nov 2017

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Food

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“Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.” – Plato

The writer.  On Monday night I met a grant writer/novel writer for drinks.  We met at a beer pub.  I had wine since I don’t drink beer.  I like the guy to choose the place for the first date.  He picked a place that was convenient for me to get to from my job and on the way to the train station.  That was very thoughtful, specially since he had to travel 40 minutes to get there.

He was very nice and paid attention to every word I said.  I talked a lot as usual.  Now every now and then he will comment on something I said that day.  When we said good bye at Grand Central we hugged and he asked if we could meet again, I said yes.  It is now Saturday and no plans for a second date have been made.

Maybe I am just the impatient kind but I think if he really wanted to see me again he would have scheduled a second date by now.  Is he waiting for me to say something?

He may have to wait forever because the longer it goes by the more reasons I keep finding on why this relationship wouldn’t work out in the long run.  And maybe he is doing the same.

**

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.” – Plato

The Korean.  I am speaking to another guy but we have yet to make plans. His life revolves around a son that is very involved in sports.   He is Korean.  I have never went on a date with an Asian man. He seems extremely smart, so I am intrigued.

I gave him my number.  I don’t always give my number out before meeting someone, but I did to him because he seemed so genuine.  He has been calling me every day, sometimes more than once.  He is supposed to check his schedule and come up with a time/place to meet.

Last night he called and we spoke for awhile.  We are both jokers and I am not sure what we were talking about that I joked about having to put our wedding plans on hold, etc.  I am only mentioning that conversation because after he hung up last night I haven’t heard from him again.  He said he would call back later.  It was already after 10 pm when he hung up, and he never called again.  It is now 4 pm the next day and nothing.

I am thinking that perhaps the jokes scared him.  We were both used to joke about things, and we had an understanding that we would communicate and clear up any misunderstandings.

Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach it. – Rene Descartes

I texted him around noon, no reply.  For some reason I think I will never him from him again.  I am just curious to know what happened that he couldn’t have said anything.  Why can people just communicate their thoughts and feelings?

Still, I may not like his action or lack of it, but I respect it.  Next!

How sad it is that I am so easy to move on to the next person?  Perhaps it is not sad, perhaps it is just the way I have to be to be able to survive on this online dating world.   I have learned not to invest myself emotionally in anyone until I am sure they deserve that investment, specially if I didn’t even meet him yet.

I don’t like disappearing acts, but any time that happens I picture my guardian angels removing that person from my life because they are not good for me.

Thank you Guardian Angels!  You know I need guidance.  I have mistaken glitter for gold more than once.

***

“Doubt is the origin of wisdom”  If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.– Rene Descartes

The dentist.  I so wish that I was speaking about a date, but no, I am speaking about having dental issues.  I am not sure I have mentioned before how much issues I have had with my teeth in the past.  I have had cavities filled, extractions, root canals, gum grafts, bone grafts, implants. etc.

For the past 2 years I have enjoyed a reprieve.  My dentist has plenty of ideas for more grafts and implants but nothing that I thought it was necessary.  All I have done in my mouth was for necessity and not cosmetic.

I had stopped going to my dentist in Scarsdale, NY because he was too expensive.  Scarsdale is synonymous with expensive. So since the middle of 2016 I have been going to one in my town that is more reasonable, since all I was doing was cleaning.

On Friday I went to her to have a front that looked chipped on the side fixed. While there I asked her to take a look at the gum on that side because it felt funny and it looked like there was a dark spot on the gum above the next tooth that happens to be an implant.  She took x-rays and said all was fine.  I was elated since I hardly ever have good news from dentists.

On Monday, out of the blue there was bleeding around the implant. It bled for a second, but I was extremely alarmed and immediately made an appointment with my original dentist.

The next day I took the day off and went to see him.  I was bracing myself for the worst.  I could already see surgery and stitches. He took x-rays and actual pictures.  He lectures around the world so I am sure my teeth has been a case study somewhere.

He said I looked beautiful as usual and I said he looked old…not something I recommend anyone to tell their dentist or anybody else, but I was very nervous and his hair had turned grayer than I remembered.

He said that the implant, bone and gums looked great and it just looked like there was something underneath, which I had immediately said popcorn.  The day before my co-worker mentioned popcorn when I said it looked like there was something under the gum.  There are 2 things that I have been eating daily and that is popcorn and grapes.

He scraped under the gum and said he removed some pieces of it.  He said to just take peroxide with a cotton swab and press against it.  He also said I need to make an appointment to get a cleaning with his assistant, and at that time we would talk about things we need to get done.

I was elated… for a couple of days.  Fast forward to a few days later my gum bled yesterday and today. It is not only the occasional bleeding but the nagging persistent feeling of subtle pain and numbness the sinus region.  I was going to have that cleaning in December because that is when the insurance will pay for another cleaning, but I can no longer wait for that.  On Monday I will call and get a cleaning asap.

Of course now I have spent hours Googling and reading about it.  There is condition called Peri-Implant that sounds like a possibility.  Funny thing while Googling is that I found an article that my own dentist wrote about it.   I decided to stop Googling and just wait until I go back to the dentist. I need to stop crossing bridges before I get to them.

I need to get done additional gum grafts for receding gum in the back.  Every time he mentions all that I need to get done I always have the same answer/joke:  find me a rich husband and I will come here and do everything you wish.

Wishing you all blessed weekend! Thank you for taking the time to read.

Divide each difficulty into as many parts as is feasible and necessary to resolve it. – Rene Descartes