Category Archives: Daily Message

Not Resolutions, Goals!

31 Saturday Dec 2022

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Cheers to an amazing 2023!

Cheers to an amazing 2023!

I didn’t want to make any New Year’s resolutions.  I didn’t want the pressure.  I still don’t.  But, at the same rate, I want to have goals and accomplish them.

What is the difference between resolutions and goals?  To me resolutions are just wishful thinking.  One just comes up with things they want to change, but with no set plans to get it accomplished. After one week or two into the new year, all is forgotten.

Goals are a written list of what one wants to achieve, along with detailed steps to get it done. Writing it down, and having clear steps aligns the thoughts with the actions.

As I get older, time seems finite and limited. I cannot waste it.  Whatever I want I need to get serious about getting it, doing it, accomplishing it. The time is now.

Wishing you all, old and new friends, the most amazing New Year! Wishing you blessings and miracles!

“Make New Year’s goals. Dig within, and discover what you would like to have happen in your life this year. This helps you do your part. It is an affirmation that you’re interested in fully living life in the year to come.

Goals give us direction. They put a powerful force into play on a universal, conscious, and subconscious level. Goals give our life direction.

What would you like to have happen in your life this year? What would you like to do, to accomplish? What good would you like to attract into your life? What particular areas of growth would you like to have happen to you? What blocks, or character defects, would you like to have removed?

What would you like to attain? Little things and big things? Where would you like to go? What would you like to have happen in friendship and love? What would you like to have happen in your family life?

What problems would you like to see solved? What decisions would you like to make? What would you like to happen in your career?

Write it down. Take a piece of paper, a few hours of your time, and write it all down – as an affirmation of you, your life, and your ability to choose. Then let it go.

The new year stands before us, like a chapter in a book, waiting to be written. We can help write that story by setting goals.”
― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency

Looking back – January 2022

29 Thursday Dec 2022

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At the office – still in the Christmas mood

Before I look to the future and talk about my plans for 2023, I want to take a look back.  Is 2022 really over?  Didn’t it just start?

I am going to look back month by month, otherwise it would be a very long post.

THIS HAPPENED IN JANUARY 2022

It was a busy month, even though I spent most of it struggling with Covid. Some of the symptoms stayed around for 3 months.  Actually, the mental fogginess and anxiety still visit every now and then.

Feeling sick, as it often does, highlights the joys of a time when one is healthy.  At that moment nothing else matters. Health is indeed our most sacred commodity!

A co-worker that I have had issues with in the past got mad at me, for no real reason, and blocked me on our internal communication chat.  I think he felt he had to have the last word.  Weeks later he unblocked me because he needed something.  I then blocked him, not as revenge but as a protection of the peace of not having to chat with him had afforded me.  We now communicate only via email when it is absolutely necessary.

I learned that no matter how much I try, some people will not like me.  I learned that sometimes the best communication is no communication at all. I also learned that forgiving is a virtue, but forgetting can be dangerous.  We have to set up and enforce boundaries to protect our emotional being.

After canceling a date with the Greek because of Covid, we eventually met for the 4th date.  I was really not feeling any chemistry, but since I said I would treat him for his birthday I felt I needed to go.  I was hoping we could be friends.  That night we disagreed on a couple of topics, but as we ended the night, I thought he understood and accepted friendship.

After that, he diminished the number of texts, so I assumed he had gotten the message.  More about him in March.

People will sometimes assume things about me. It is not on me; it is on them.  I cannot force anyone to understand me. I know who I am.  That is enough.

The infamous EX-boyfriend (the cause for the start of this blog 10 years ago) reached out with a weird text about the sauna in his house.  I did what I always do.  I ignored him.  And blocked him.

He no longer has any effect on me. It took me years to put my heart back together after him.  It all passes and I grow stronger and stronger.

I reconnected with an older woman, my mom and I had met in Israel.  It is good to reconnect with people that brings us good memories.  It brightened her day and mine.

I just called her today.  She is now 90 years old.  She was so happy to hear from me. She is such a kind soul.  

I need to remember the good souls from my past and do more of an effort of reaching out. Human connections are important, specially the ones that make my heart sing!

I finally got my floors finished and, and in the process the noise disturbed my neighbors.  I had notified the building management, but they had failed to notify the neighbors.  Instead of getting mad, I knocked on the neighbor’s door with a bottle of wine and a smile as an apology.  They were surprised.

We are now great friends. My sister and I are now included in their get-togethers.

It is often better to take the high road.  It definitely better to be happy than to be right!  It is hard to fight the instinct to fight, not to be perceived as weak and a doormat. But I choose to pick my battles.  Not everything requires a fight. Sometimes is better to solve issues with a bottle of wine and a smile.

That was a summary of January 2022. February coming next.

Final mosaic projects of the year: A basket of flowers and a picture frame

21 Wednesday Dec 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Mosaic and other crafts

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“The earth laughs in flowers.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

My last 2 mosaics of the year.  The basket of flowers I made at the studio, and the picture frame I made at home.  I am trying to get used to doing projects at home, for those times that the studio is closed.

They are mostly made from dinner plates and coffee mugs.

With each project I get more and more ideas.  The mosaic world is huge and I want to explore it all!  May you find a hobby you love as much as I love doing mosaics!

“I must have flowers, always, and always.”
― Claude Monet

“In joy or sadness, flowers are our constant friends.”
― Okakura Kakuzo

“If you want a forgotten corner to be remembered, a featureless place to be loved, a shadowy emptiness to shine, put some flowers there!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan

“There are no bad pictures; that’s just how your face looks sometimes.”
― Abraham Lincoln

A BLESSED HOLIDAY SEASON TO ALL!  THANK YOU FOR GRACING ME WITH YOUR PRESENCE, ENERGY, SUPPORT AND LOVE!  YOU ARE APPRECIATED AND LOVED! 

Holiday Season Anxiety: feeling the pressure to give the perfect gift

20 Tuesday Dec 2022

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“A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.” ― Seneca

The holiday season gets me very anxious.  My source of anxiety is gift giving and tipping.  I think I have mentioned here before that I hate shopping.  I will do some online but I rather just put cash in an envelope.

But, how much?  For the personnel at my apartment building(8 people) and my office building (9 people) I have an excel spreadsheet that I keep track of how much I have given in the past.  I just update it.  Some people are gone, some new people have been hired.  Still, I obsess over it.

Do I give the same amount?  Do I adjust for inflation? Or do I adjust by how much they have helped me throughout the year?  If that is the case then I would give nothing to some.  In the end everyone gets at least what they got last year.  I have the feeling that I overtip, but I guess that is better than undertip.

What do I do about some people, such as my friends, that I cannot just put cash in an envelope?  My second go-to gift is a gift card.  But to where?  Starbucks?  Amazon? Or is that just lame?

I am one of those people that have good intentions.  Every year I plan on paying attention to people, to their conversation, likes and dislikes, so that on their birthday and at Christmas I will know what to give.  Big failure, I never put those plans in motion.  Pay attention to conversation?  That is so foreign to me.  I am too busy talking or thinking of what to say next.

“Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.” ― Erma Bombeck

Tonight is my last night at the mosaic studio before Christmas, and I still don’t have a gift for the owner/teacher.  She is such an amazing person.  She is so thoughtful and giving. Throughout the year she has given me little things here and there just because.  She already gave me a couple of things for Christmas.  I need to find the perfect gift for her, not only because of those gifts but because of the joy she gives me by having the mosaic studio. Her guidance and joy is priceless.

The clock is ticking… I can probably buy myself some time and announce that I have something coming, but its arrival is late.  Yes, I am considering lying and blaming the mailman.  I will probably just come clean and tell the truth: I don’t know what to give, so I freeze.

I am always hoping that people don’t give me anything, because the pressure to retribute is immense.  The more thoughtful their gift is, the more anxious I get.

Don’t get me wrong.  I love to give.  The moment I know someone needs something I am the first one to give/donate.  I struggle with coming up with ideas for people that have everything.  My problem is feeling the pressure to find the perfect gift.

For some new acquaintances I like to give a bag with 3 of my favorite books: The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, and The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran.  I also bring soaps and lotions with natural ingredients from Brazil as gifts.  Perhaps there is a bit of thoughtfulness in me after all.

Happy gift giving and receiving to you all! I have some more obsessing to do.

“Books make great gifts because they have whole worlds inside of them. And it’s much cheaper to buy somebody a book than it is to buy them the whole world!” ― Neil Gaiman

If my money grew like my money tree is growing…

15 Thursday Dec 2022

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Money tree (on the wall is a panel forest scene my mom painted)

“The fact that I can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another’s, smile at someone and receive a smile in return, are to me continual spiritual exercises.” – Leo Buscaglia

My money tree is out of control.  For the longest time it was just one height, it never really grew… until now.  All of a sudden it keeps achieving new heights.

Will it stop eventually or do I put a stake up so I can guide it and keep it straight?  After all it is called “tree” so perhaps it can be as tall as a tree.

I just Goggled and apparently it is like a bonsai tree, it needs to be trimmed.

That is venturing into scary gardening area.  I will water it, and even repotted it, but taking a pair of scissors to it is a different ball game.

I never intended to keep plants.  Well, what I mean is I never intended on being a gardener.  My idea of having plants was “just water it once a week”.  And that is what I have been doing.  My plants are thriving not because of me, but because of the sunlight here.

Well, I do talk to them, so that may help a bit.  And I do repot them when they get too large for their pot. So, I guess I have been gardening without knowing.

Similar to any other relationship, the relationship with plants takes work.  For them to prosper I need to invest time and care.  What I will get out of it, is in proportion to the care and time I put into it.  No brainer really.  Just life explaining to me, yet again, the concept of work and reward.

So,  trimming I will.  Wish me luck!

I got this plant years ago just because of the name. According to Feng Shui, the money tree brings prosperity and good luck.  It should be placed in the southeast area of the home or office.

Now if I can only figure out where the southeast area is…

“Everyday is a bank account, and time is our currency. No one is rich, no one is poor, we’ve got 24 hours each.” ― Christopher Rice

Being ok with disappointment

13 Tuesday Dec 2022

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“Disappointment is just the action of your brain readjusting itself to reality after discovering things are not the way you thought they were.” – Brad Warner

I am still sad and disappointed over Brazil’s loss at the World Cup! It is stupid, it is just a game, but why does it hurt so much?

To us Brazilians it feels bigger than a just a game.  It is our identity.  I grew up thinking Brazil was the best soccer team in the world.  We had something of our own to be proud of.

But, Friday, we didn’t play the jogo bonito (beautiful game).  The players looked tired. It was definitely not a good day for us.  Actually, we haven’t played well in many, many years. We have been living in the past.

I sound like a hardcore soccer fan.  I am not.  But when it is the World Cup, I love everything about it.  Specially thinking that Brazil may triumph.

What to do when you are disappointed about something that you have no control of?  Not much.  I did what I often do with feelings that are hard to deal with. I confront them. I acknowledge them. I sit with them in discomfort.

I acknowledged that I was disappointed.  I accepted the loss and accepted that it hurt.  Brazil lost fair and square, no one to blame.  There was no anger, just sadness.

The best team that day won.  And unfortunately the best team was not Brazil.  Kudos to Croatia!

Now what?  Now we wait another 4 years to try again.  It is life, and we move on. Now we have 4 years to think about what went wrong, make better choices and try again.

The World Cup 2022 has lost some of its flavor for me, but I will still tune in and root for the underdogs. Go Morocco! May they make history and go all the way!

“When we refuse to work with our disappointment, we break the Precepts: rather than experience the disappointment, we resort to anger, greed, gossip, criticism. Yet it’s the moment of being that disappointment which is fruitful; and, if we are not willing to do that, at least we should notice that we are not willing. The moment of disappointment in life is an incomparable gift that we receive many times a day if we’re alert. This gift is always present in anyone’s life, that moment when ‘It’s not the way I want it!” ― Charlotte Joko Beck

 

REPOST: AN ALPHABET OF GRATITUDE!!

05 Monday Dec 2022

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This post is now over 10 years old.  I have gotten some comments on it lately and decided to repost it.  I am still grateful for everything listed and need to add so many more things to it.  For now I am just reposting it as is.  I will create a new gratitude list and post it in the near future.

Continue to find things to be grateful for in your life! Be grateful for the little or much you have and much more will come.

I know I left out a lot things I am grateful for.  I am sure I will remember a few more every time I look at this post. (like life, breath, water, freedom of choice, etc 🙂

A-ANDREA and ANIMALS – I am grateful for my identical twin sister. I am grateful for having a partner in crime right in the womb! She rocks!  The world is a better place because ANIMALS are in it!

B-BREAD and BED – So grateful for not having to worry about having food to eat and a bed to sleep. I am blessed! I feel so safe in my bed and I really enjoy my food!


C- CAR, CHOCOLATE and CLOUDS – I am grateful for having transport.  After 1 year without chocolate I am grateful for the flavor of chocolate.  Every time I look up and see clouds they make me realize the wonder of it all! and sometimes I see a bunny!

D-DANCING and DOORS – I am grateful for the love of dancing. I am grateful for the opening of new doors and opportunities every day.

E-EX and EXPERIENCES – I am grateful for my EX and all other exes before, Ex-boyfriend, Ex-boss, ex-friend, etc, all of them provides EXPERIENCES that enabled me to grow and be where I am today.


F-FAMILY, FRIEND and FORGIVENESS – So grateful for having my family and friends, a support group that I can always count on. FORGIVENESS is at the heart of any progress and moving forward in my life. Forgiveness is what makes relationships work.


G-GOD and GRATITUDE and GOALS – I am grateful for believing in a GOD that loves me and wants only the best for me! I am grateful for a grateful heart!

H-HARMONY and HEROS –  I am grateful for a harmonious life. I am great for daily heros, for people that I encounter and have encountered in my life that have provided with inspiration.

I-INSPIRATION and INTUITION – I am grateful for moments of intuition and inspiration – those challenge me and make progress in the right direction.

J-JOB and JOY – I am grateful for a job that allows me not to worry about food and shelter.  I am grateful for all the joys in my life, big and small.

K- KISS – I am grateful for the joys and beauty of a kiss. There is nothing better in life!

L- LOVE – I am grateful for believing in love and having love in my heart!

M-MUSIC and MISSION –  I am grateful for being able to have amazing beautiful soundtrack for my life! I am grateful for believing I have a mission in life and for not giving up in its search.


N- NEVER – I am grateful for not believing in the word NEVER and always believeing that there is a chance!

O- OPTIMISM– I am grateful for my eternal optimism.

P – PEACE AND PAIN – I believe and strive for peace. I believe PAIN is the catalyst for major progress in life.

Q-QUOTES and QUESTIONS – I love quotes, my Facebook will attest to that! QUESTIONS keeps my mind open and challenge me to not accept things as is.


R- RAIN – I am grateful for everything about rain. The benefits, the sound, the appearance.

S-SOLITUDE and SKIING – I am grateful for enjoying moments of SOLITUDE. I am happy and grateful for having skiing as one of the new challenges in my life.

T- TOLERANCE and TENNIS –  I am grateful for having a tolerant heart and grateful for everything about the game of TENNIS – playing and watching and the fun outfits.


U- UNIVERSE and UNICORN –  I am so grateful for believing that the UNIVERSE is always on my side. I am grateful for believing in unicorns.

V – VACATIONS – I am grateful for having vacations – a change to renew and recharge.

W – WOMAN and WONDER and WRITING – I am grateful for being a woman, full of wonder. I am full of hormones and feelings and WONDER about the world.


X – XMAS and XYLOTOL– hey X is a hard word! Even though I am a little ambivalent about Xmas, who doesn’t enjoy the blinking lights. Sugar free gum is king.

Y- YOUTH, YOUTH OF HEART AND MIND – I am grateful for youth – for what the next generation will bring. I am grateful for my youthful self, for feeling like I am 25 years old most of the time.

Z-ZUMBA – I am grateful for burning calories while doing something I love.

I have World Cup Fever

01 Thursday Dec 2022

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World Cup games are on!

“Football is the ballet of the masses.” –― Dmitri Shostakovich

I love the World Cup.  I am from Brazil, so that maybe a given.  I don’t love the World Cup in December and in Qatar, but that is what we have, so I am going to enjoy it.

Lucky for me all the brokers work from home, so at the office I can watch whatever I want.  In the office is just my assistant/co-worker and I.  The boss/partner stops by once every month or two.

I get to watch all the games from my desk.  It is not the same as watching from home, but it is not too bad.  I go home to watch all of Brazil’s games. Brazil is doing well so far.  It has already advanced to the round of 16, so tomorrow’s game is mostly practice for the players on the reserve.

Of course I hope Brazil wins it it all.  But the competition is fierce, and we don’t always play our best game. May the most deserving team win!  I do love when an underdog wins.

I love the energy and fun of the World Cup.  I love to see all the fans dressed in their team color.  The next World Cup will be in 2026 and will be shared by the US, Canada and Mexico.  I am already planning on attending a game or two 🙂

“Soccer isn’t the same as Bach or Buddhism. But it is often more deeply felt than religion, and just as much a part of the community’s fabric, a repository of traditions.” ― Franklin Foer

Thanksgiving, today and always

24 Thursday Nov 2022

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“Take full account of what Excellencies you possess, and in gratitude remember how you would hanker after them, if you had them not.”
― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Thank you my reader and friend for your likes and comments. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience. Thank you for your time and energy!

Wishing you a wonderfully blessed thanksgiving.   May you have health and peace.  May your table be full and your home warm! May you continue to find more and more reasons to give thanks!

“I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual. It is surprising how contented one can be with nothing definite – only a sense of existence. Well, anything for variety. I am ready to try this for the next ten thousand years, and exhaust it. How sweet to think of! my extremities well charred, and my intellectual part too, so that there is no danger of worm or rot for a long while. My breath is sweet to me. O how I laugh when I think of my vague indefinite riches. No run on my bank can drain it, for my wealth is not possession but enjoyment.” ― Henry David Thoreau

 

A blessing often taken for granted

07 Monday Nov 2022

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“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart” ― Helen Keller

On Friday I left work at 11am.  My sister met me outside of our building.  She got in the car and we proceeded to discuss the best way to get to White Plains, NY.

Should we avoid the highway and just use the local route?  It would take a bit longer but we wouldn’t have the usual highway delays of lately.  We chose local.

We were wrong. We encountered two road blocks due to construction.  I feel the entire New York state is under construction.  At one point my sister asked if we were near, as we ended up taking some back roads that she was not familiar with.  I could feel her relief when I said that we were only 5 minutes away.

Finally we arrived our location.  Now we proceed to the parking near it. I didn’t think there was any room on the first level so I took the curvy route all the way to the 6th floor.  Getting out of the parking lot and into the street was another long story, as we kept getting off on different streets and had to go back and find the right exit.

By now it was 12: 05.  She had to be there at 12:15pm.  I pointed to a building in the corner and said: there it is.  She panicked when she saw that it said: White Plains Library on the building.  She feared we were on the wrong place.  I assured her that the right building was just next door.  Again, relief on her face on she saw the 111 Number sign on the building, signaling the right place: 111 Martin Luther King Boulevard, the address of the Westchester County Court.

We entered it, went though the security desk, and were pointed to the right courtroom.  There was a big signed that said: NATURALIZATION.

“Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good.” ― Maya Angelou, Celebrations: Rituals of Peace and Prayer

On this Friday, November 4th 2022, my sister officially became a United States citizen.  I have been a citizen for a long time, but still, during the whole event I was moved and had a lump in my throat.  It was emotional to be in a room with 48 newly naturalized citizens and their families, with so many different cultures, languages, backgrounds and stories of trials and triumph.

Upon entering the courtroom, the new citizens to be first lined up to see the desk clerks to answer some final questions and to surrender their green cards.  Then they sat and waited for the ceremony to start.  When it started Tim C. Idoni, the court clerk and a previous New Rochelle Mayor, administered the Oath of Citizenship to the new citizens.  Then the entire room got up for the Pledge of Allegiance. 

Then the presiding judge spoke. I can’t recall her name but it was her first time presiding over the Oath of Ceremony. In her Congratulatory speech, she welcomed the new citizens and also added some of her personal history to it.  She mentioned she was the granddaughter of Irish immigrants, and the first person from her family to go to college, law school, and now become a judge.

Then they called names, 3 at a time.  The new citizens would go to the front, shake hands with the Judge and the County Clerk and be handed the Certificate of Naturalization.  My sister came back to her seat beaming with pride.  She was now focused on trying to get a picture with the Judge and the clerk at the end.  She wanted to document the day in any and every way she could.

As soon as they declared the proceedings over, she jumped up and went to ask for a picture with the judge and clerk.  They graciously agreed.  I took a few pictures, then realized that a line started to form of people wanting to take pictures.  She had started a chain reaction.

At first she loved the pictures I took, but later she took a closer look.  Apparently, I always cut the feet off when I take full length pictures of people standing up.  When she started to complain about it, I didn’t say anything.  I am learning the virtues of silence in certain situations. Also, it was her day!

In the evening I treated her to dinner at Sergio’s in Pelham, NY.  They have the best short ribs with risotto ever! Actually, my boss paid for dinner as congratulations to her.

After the ceremony, she called and emailed everyone she could think of.  She wanted the world to share in her happiness and good fortune.

It took my sister 12 years to get a green card, and then another 5 years to get the citizenship.  She is over the moon!  She is proud, happy, and above all grateful for this amazing opportunity.  I am all of that as well, and more!

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love—then make that day count!” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free