Author Archives: A Star on the Forehead

I am a the daughter of a lottery winner!

17 Wednesday Mar 2021

Posted by in Daily Life

≈ 39 Comments

Tags

, , ,

“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” ― Roy T. Bennett

Last week my father won the lottery!

Wait!!! Don’t start congratulating me just yet! 

It was the Brazilian Lottery. Plus, he only got 5 numbers instead of 6, or something like that.  

He won 1,680.00 Brazilian Reais. In US Dollars it would be around $300.00. He has been playing forever and never wins more than a couple of dollars. So this is very exciting for him.

“It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” ― Mother Theresa

He wanted to share his winnings with the family. He is giving 400 reais each to my mom, my brother, my sister and I. He is keeping 80 reais.

That, to him, was a fair split.  That, right there, illustrate how my parents are.  They think of themselves last.   He is choosing to keep only 80 reais of his winnings. He thinks this is a perfect split.

Of course, the four of us wanted him to keep the whole thing. My sister told him she didn’t need any money, that he should keep it all.  His answer was: “None of you guys need it, but you all deserve it”.

Isn’t he the cutest?

In the end we decided to accept the money.  It made him feel good.  The money will go back to him anyway, as I am always giving him money to play.

Our family believes that is better to give than receive. I am glad I was raised with that value.

“If nature has made you for a giver, your hands are born open, and so is your heart; and though there may be times when your hands are empty, your heart is always full, and you can give things out of that—warm things, kind things, sweet things—help and comfort and laughter—and sometimes gay, kind laughter is the best help of all.”
― Frances Hodgson Burnett

Friday’s Lunch date report

14 Sunday Mar 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating

≈ 34 Comments

Tags

, , , , ,

“If you have carefully examined hundred people you met in your life journey, it means that you have read hundred different books! Every person you know is a book; world is full of walking books; some are boring, some are marvelous, some are weak, some are powerful, but they are all useful because they all carry different experiences of different paths!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan

On Friday I worked from home so that I could easily meet S. for lunch.  He is a successful 54 year old patent attorney.  He lives about 40 minutes from me.  We met 12pm at a Mexican Restaurant near my home, La Herradura. 

He had an avocado salad and vegetable quesadilla.  He is vegetarian, slowly becoming vegan. I am not! I had a ground beef empanada and chicken quesadillas. We didn’t order alcohol.  He said he would drink if I wanted to drink, as he wouldn’t let me drink alone. I opted not to have a drink.  It just felt too early to me, plus I wouldn’t want him having a drink and then driving.

Lately, it seems to me that there are 2 topics that can be very polarizing. Specially when initially meeting someone.  They are: Trump and Veganism. I will not get along with anyone that is not only hardcore on those topics, but that, worst, will try to change my mind on my views about it.

I will respect people’s choice and opinions, but there is nothing I hate more than to have people try to convert me into their way of thinking. He did not.  He said he changed his eating habits due to health, the environment and ethics.  I understand and appreciate that, but I am not there yet.  My goal is to continue getting healthier, with moderation and balance being my guide.

We didn’t really discuss politics, but he mentioned being happy that Trump is gone.  He seemed shy and nervous at first, but once we started talking the conversation flowed. We talked non-stop for 3 hours. We both are the type that share everything and volunteers information.

There is no question I won’t ask, and it turns out there is no question he won’t answer, so it was a perfect match 🙂 We talked about serious stuff, but we also joked and laughed a lot. His sense of humor matched mine.

“The power of getting to know one another is so immense, eclipsed only by first getting to know ourselves.” ― Bryant McGill

I found out that his baggage is way heavier than mine. At our age (over 50), we all have baggage, but some people do overpack.  He has been married twice with 5 kids from varying ages. He is still in the process of getting divorced from the second wife. It is not a pretty divorce. 

I am open minded about the situations that people find themselves in.  Life happens and it is often messy.  I don’t have children, and there are no kids in my family, so I do welcome a man with kids. What I don’t like is the potential nightmare ex scenario.

I detect something good about him and I am willing to see him again and see where it goes. It will require patience, since he has a lot on his plate.

After lunch I walked him to his car.  He seemed unsure how to say good bye, so I just hugged him.  Having masks on, it is easy to assume that there will be no good bye kiss.  I like not feeling that pressure.

We have been texting on and off since then.

“If you wish to glimpse inside a human soul and get to know a man, don’t bother analyzing his ways of being silent, of talking, of weeping, of seeing how much he is moved by noble ideas; you will get better results if you just watch him laugh. If he laughs well, he’s a good man.” ― Fyodor Dostoevsky

 

The guest and the gift

11 Thursday Mar 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 17 Comments

Tags

, , , , ,

“In one thing you have not changed, dear friend,” said Aragorn: “you still speak in riddles.”
“What? In riddles?” said Gandalf. “No! For I was talking aloud to myself. A habit of the old: they choose the wisest person present to speak to; the long explanations needed by the young are wearying.” –  J.R.R. Tolkien

I love babies, specially little Edward, that I hope to see again someday.  But I also love older people.

I have mentioned here,  years ago, that I was volunteering in a nursing home. Even though that didn’t really work out, it did make me realize that I enjoy their company and wisdom.  It also saddened me to see in person how some are just discarded by society, and even worst, by their own families.

I am so glad that I still have my parents, and that they are being treated like royalty by my siblings and I. It is such a blessing to have my brother and sister share my care, love and respect for my parents.

“It`s not how old you are, it`s how you are old.”
― Jules Renard

One of my friends works as a caretaker for an elderly man.  She has mentioned him to me a few times but I had never met him before.

Yesterday, all of a sudden, as I am working at my desk, she walked in.  She said: “Are you busy? There is someone that wants to meet you”.  In walks her boss pushing his walker.

She found out that I am in the same building that his ENT doctor is located.  Since he had an appointment there, she took the opportunity to stop by.

He was the sweetest and funniest man.  He is 89 years old but sharp as a tack. We joked and made fun of my friend.  He then said he had brought me a gift.  He open the seat of his walker and removed a little eyeglass case.  In it there was this little beaver carved out of some pink stone.

It doesn’t really look like a beaver but he said it was a beaver, therefore it is a beaver to me.  Look at the picture below and tell me what animal do you think it is.

He said it was Indian and it was meant to give me protection and prosperity.  I will take it! He gave me some of the background on it, but I was so taken by the gesture that I didn’t pay attention.

I do that often. I get so involved in the feeling of the moment that I ignore all else. I will ask my friend to find out for me.

I felt so special! 🙂

I am still in pain. The dentist said it is normal for the pain to be stronger a few days after the surgery.  He said it should be gone by day 7.  It is just so abnormal for me to have such pain after a dental surgery.  He also said I should stop taking Advil alone and combine it with Tylenol.

Well, the 7th day is tomorrow and to celebrate it I scheduled a lunch date.   I am not sure if I more more excited for the date or for the food.  It will be the first time in one week that I will be eating more than yogurt and scrambled eggs.

Stay tuned for the details… of my meal. 🙂

“The Little Boy and the Old Man

Said the little boy, “Sometimes I drop my spoon.”
Said the old man, “I do that too.”
The little boy whispered, “I wet my pants.”
I do that too,” laughed the little old man.
Said the little boy, “I often cry.”
The old man nodded, “So do I.”
But worst of all,” said the boy, “it seems
Grown-ups don’t pay attention to me.”
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.
I know what you mean,” said the little old man.”
― Shel Silverstein

Went on a date and fell in love with a baby

08 Monday Mar 2021

Posted by in Daily Life

≈ 42 Comments

Tags

, , , , ,

I had my dental surgery on Friday at 11am.  I expected to be 100% by today,  but I am not. I am still in pain.  I have had many dental surgeries before and normally the recovery is a breeze.  I take 1 pain pill the first day and that’s it.  By lunch yesterday I had already taken all the pills they gave me (6-600mg ibuprofen).

I am at work now and decided to try not to take any pain meds. I am accepting this discomfort, knowing that it will pass. I am keeping the conversations to a minimum and eating only soft foods.  It helps.  I will also leaving shortly and go to bed as soon as I get home.

As far as the procedure, the removal of the implant, bone graft and the cleaning of other 2 implants; apparently it all went well. It will take some time to know for sure if we were able to save the other 2 implants. Fingers crossed.

Even though I should be a pro by now, for some reason I was really nervous and scared about this surgery.  I am blaming it on aging.  I am becoming a chicken as I age. 

To take my mind off of it, I decided to accept a dinner invitation for the night before.  I met N. on OKCupid.   He is the CFO of a Marketing company.  He is 57 years old and lives in Darien, CT, 30 minutes from me.

We went to a French restaurant called Encore Bistro Francais.  He had red wine and I had a St. Germain cocktail.  He had the cassoulet and I had a burger.  I know I probably should have ordered something else, but the burger seemed the perfect comfort food to prepare me for the next day’s surgery.  We shared profiteroles for dessert.  Everything was delicious!

The conversation flowed.  He has lived in different countries and had a lot to share. He was fun to talk to. We will probably go on a second date. Because of my surgery we didn’t schedule anything.

“I love these little people; and it is not a slight thing when they, who are so fresh from God, love us.” ― Charles Dickens

But, the highlight of the evening was this tiny little guy, probably a year and half old.  He was seated with his back to me, but he kept turning around to look and smile at me.  At a certain point his father joked that he would probably have to get into a fight with my date over his flirting with me.

This child was the most well behaved child I have ever seen.  He made no noise or mess. Even when trying to get my attention he would just make faces and smile.  I would ignore him to pay attention to my date, but he never gave up, every time I looked his way, he was staring and smiling. 

“The soul is healed by being with children.” – Fyodor Dostoevsky

When he was done eating his father turned his chair around so that he could look straight at me, and didn’t have to keep turning.  I learned his name was Edward when a lady, from a table next to him, asked.  I didn’t want to be rude to my date, plus there is Covid, so I kept my distance but would have loved to hug him.

That night, my date never had a chance.  Edward stole my heart. 

“I’ve never really understood the desire people have to quantify a baby. “He’s X big and Y long,” As if the baby is a fish you’re not sure you’re going to keep. Or some prize potato you’re hoping will win a prize at the county fair.” ― Patrick Rothfuss

Salvaging

02 Tuesday Mar 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message

≈ 24 Comments

Tags

, , , ,

“Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.” ― Roy T. Bennett

There was a service for my friend’s daughter on Sunday.  It was beautifully decorated with sunflowers and white roses.  My friend was stoic. We could see that she has the weight of the world on her shoulders.

My sister and I have been around her. We took her out to dinner on Friday night and on shopping on Saturday.  This week, as she returns to work, we will take turns checking in on her.

“Get busy living or get busy dying.” – Shawshank Redemption

Death clearly shows us brevity and beauty of life.  That is the only certainty we have: one day we will die.  So let’s not waste this finite, precious gift.  Do more, worry less.  

So many things I want to do that I keep leaving for tomorrow. Always waiting for something to do something.  The time is now.  It is always now.

“Death should not quiet your soul; instead, it should enliven it.” ― Angie Corbett-Kuiper

On Friday I am going in for another dental surgery.  The 2 laser treatments I had done to try to save this 1 implant worked for a couple of years. The latest x-rays shows that it stopped working. I cannot wait any longer. I will be removing 1 implant to hopefully still save the other 2.  Fingers crossed.

“Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it.” ― J.K. Rowling

Tomorrow marks the 1 Year anniversary of the first Covid case in New Rochelle.  We will be observing one minute of silence at exact 12pm.  At 7pm there will be “Clap Because We Care” – stand outside or open our windows to make noise in support of health care workers and essential workers. 

I thought, that at most, this would last 2 weeks. We are now marking anniversaries.  Such a crazy time in this place called Earth.

“The Chinese use two brush strokes to write the word ‘crisis.’ One brush stroke stands for danger; the other for opportunity. In a crisis, be aware of the danger–but recognize the opportunity.” ― John F. Kennedy

Another day, another rose, another sign…

25 Thursday Feb 2021

Posted by in Daily Life

≈ 22 Comments

Tags

, , ,

“It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important.” ― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

I wrote on a post  last week that I found a artificial flower on the street.  Today I found another one.

This one is also a red rose, but it has a small bud on the side.  In the picture below they look similar but they are actually very different.  They are made from different materials and different shades of red.

I do live near a florist, but in 10 years living here I have never found any flower on the street, real or artificial.  I welcome them as little gifts from heaven. Little signs of God’s beauty and grace;  and of the bright future to come.

When I picked it up I immediately thought of my friend that lost her daughter, one week ago today.  

It is her and her daughter, the rose and the rosebud. One part of the other. I am giving it to her.

“The loss of a loved one is like the loss of a part of oneself; an arm or a leg. At first, the pain is so physical that it is hard to ignore. The trauma is so intense that the mind finds it hard to cope with the loss. With time the pain eases, the body recovers and the brain figures out new ways to go on.”
― Federico Chini, The Sea of Forgotten Memories

powerless…

23 Tuesday Feb 2021

Posted by in Daily Life

≈ 42 Comments

Tags

, , , ,

This is post about death. If you are not comfortable with that subject please stop reading.

On Thursday I was on the office phone with my Mom, happily talking to her about the skiing trip that I had planned for today.  My sister and I, and a couple of friends, were going to spend Sunday and Monday at Camelback mountain in Pennsylvania.  It was my sister’s first time on skis, so we were super excited.  We were also looking forward to the feeling of being free.

My cell phone rang and it was my friend A.  I answered and asked if I could call her right back.  She said: “no, my daughter is dead”.

I felt as if I had been punched on the stomach.  Her neighbor came on the line and gave me the grim details. My friend A. had just found her 24 year old daughter dead from an overdose.

I hung up and went back to my mom, that had been waiting on the line.  At that moment I didn’t know how to give her such news, so I lied.  I said: “Please pray for A’s daughter, she is not doing well”. 

I paced back and forth a for a minute, feeling momentarily lost.  Then I put my coat on and walked to her house.  I got there as 3 detectives were leaving.  They told me my friend was inside.

A. was surrounded by a couple of friends that I hadn’t met before.  She was repeating to herself that her daughter was dead and she was a bad mother.  My heart broke for her.  The women that were there started to say a prayer.  She ran out of the house.  I ran after her.

I caught up with her.  I said the usual platitudes, not knowing exactly what to say.  We just walked up and down the street for awhile. 

What could I have said that would have made any difference?  At that point I don’t think that she was even capable of hearing anything.

She alternated from silence to admonishing herself.  She didn’t really let herself cry until much later.  I stayed with her until later in the evening.  I left when additional friends and family arrived.

“Death is not the end
Death can never be the end.

Death is the road.
Life is the traveller.
The Soul is the Guide

…

Our mind thinks of death.
Our heart thinks of life
Our soul thinks of Immortality”

― Sri Chinmoy

The next day, I went with her to the funeral home. Because of Covid they were only allowing 2 people to be there. The family asked me to go. 

The girl had mentioned to her sister and friends that she wanted to be cremated.   The mother didn’t want that but, after a lot thought, decided to abide by her wishes.  

There had been a lot back and forth amongst the family as to the issue of burial or cremation. Some family members also felt the mother had to see her daughter one last time to say good bye.  They, themselves, wanted to see her and say a last good bye.

It turned out that no one could see her. An autopsy is being performed and then cremation.  In these situations, there is what we think happens, what we think it should happen, and then there is what actually happens.

So many people, well intentioned, had a lot of advice to give.  The mother was confused and second-guessing herself.  My advise, as in any situation, is to pray asking for guidance.

I said to A., as I say to all, follow your heart.  Unfortunately, now is the time for acceptance. We can only do so much, and the rest we need to accept.  She needs to make the decisions she can live with it.  

She has already gone through so much. I am not listing here all her hardships, as I feel I would be invading her privacy.  Trust me, even before this tragedy, I often said to her: “I don’t know how you do it”.

She had tried so hard to save her daughter.  In the end, nothing could have saved her, but herself.

How does one convince a mother that all is going to be okay? What is okay for a mother that lost her child?  Nothing will ever be the same, and yet life has to go on.  Normal has now another meaning for her.

I continue to believe that after every tragedy there are miracles. I will forever look for them.

Cherish life! It is fleeting.

… and as I write this, I just learned that the brother of a lady I know, a successful married father, jumped from a bridge to his death…

the feeling of powerlessness and sadness attempts to take over as I search for rainbows and miracles. I pray. I hope. No matter what.

“there is a place in the heart that
will never be filled

a space

and even during the
best moments
and
the greatest times
times

we will know it

we will know it
more than
ever

there is a place in the heart that
will never be filled
and

we will wait
and
wait

in that space.”
― Charles bukowski

 

2 pennies and a rose: how lucky can a person be? or should I say blessed?

17 Wednesday Feb 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Finding Me

≈ 28 Comments

Tags

, , , ,

“When we’re interested in something, everything around us appears to refer to it (the mystics call these phenomena ‘signs’, the sceptics ‘coincidence’, and psychologists ‘concentrated focus’, although I’ve yet to find out what term historians would use).” ― Paulo Coelho, The Witch of Portobello

I believe in signs. I believe that if we are paying attention, if our minds are still, we can notice signs all over.

I don’t pay attention.  I am never quiet.  My mind is always going 100 miles per hours. I am sure I go through life missing signs. But every now and then, I see something and it feels like a sign.

I am that person that believes in everything that cannot be seen or explained. I believe in unicorns, angels, miracles, fairy-tales, soulmates and all of that is magical and unexplainable.

I pray that I am able to see the signs as I encounter them. Yes, I believe in the power of prayer too.  I pray for signs that show me that I am in the right path; that I didn’t veer off into the wrong path.

“I can choose either to be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of treasure. It’s all a question of how I view my life.” ― Paulo Coelho, Eleven Minutes

The other day, as I was walking to work, I felt a pebble inside my shoe. I stopped, and as I flipped my shoe, two pennies fell off. I was surprised.  It felt like a tiny pebble and not coins. (see picture below)

How did it get there? I don’t know, and I don’t really care.  I see it as a sign. A sign of abundance and prosperity, of money coming my way. Based on what, you may ask? On nothing; just my crazy ever so optimistic mind.

I got to work and a few minutes later I got an email from my credit card confirming a $1,000 refund for a ticket to Brazil that I had already given up on.  



Today, as I am again walking to work, I see a rose on the sidewalk. I was passing on by, then I thought to myself: If it was money, I would pick it up, why not a flower?  I went back and picked it up. (see the picture below)

It is one of those flowers made of fabric.  It looked perfect, clean, and so out of place lying on the sidewalk on this frigid winter day.  

To me, it came bringing all sorts of messages. It signals goodness blooming. It means love, happiness, good fortune, good days ahead. All that goodness coming and going, to me and from me.   

No, unfortunately I didn’t get to work and Prince Charming was waiting for me 😦  But it could happen.  I believe!


That is me! Always a dreamer!  May I always be in the moment and alert to see the signs gifted to me from above.

I think I notice signs walking to work because that is when I am at my quietest.  It is early, not a lot people on the street. I don’t have the TV or radio going.  I am not fiddling on the cell phone.  I am doing 1 thing: walking, instead of 3 or 4. I am just walking, happy, feeling the cold air on my face and feeling ever so alive.

“I believe in signs….what we need to learn is always there before us, we just have to look around us with respect & attention to discover where God is leading us and which step we should take. When we are on the right path, we follow the signs, and if we occasionally stumble, the Divine comes to our aid, preventing us from making mistakes.” ― Paulo Coelho, The Zahir

Your Love is King, my heart is your castle!

14 Sunday Feb 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Finding Me

≈ 40 Comments

Tags

, , , , , ,

“Let everything happen to you
Beauty and terror
Just keep going
No feeling is final”
― Rainer Maria Rilke

I am dealing with the opposite of writer’s block.  I have had so much I wanted to share and so many ideas, and yet I can’t manage to finish a post.  It is 2am now and I promised myself that I will not go to sleep until I hit the Publish button. So forgive the typos.

I have started doing to my posts what I do with books.  I start multiple ones, but never finish them.  I need to change this bad habit that is starting to permeate all areas of my life.

Because it is Valentine’s Day I want to leave you with a song that I love. I love everything about Sade and her music.  This song also reminds me of when I first arrived in the US, in 1984.  It had been released at that time.

It was a time of newness, discovery, uncertainty, sadness, excitement, and so much belief and faith.

“What have we to fear, we who believe?” ― Victor Hugo

What I don’t remember having at that time was fear.  I was too young at that point to have any fear.  What a blessing it is to know no fear.  I was 17 years, and even without speaking the language, having any money or job, I did feel I would be okay in this foreign land.  I didn’t know the details of when, what or how, but I knew I would be okay. 

It was not a feeling of complete invincibility. Perhaps it was just ignorance of fear. I was ready and eager to embrace the future. I envy the focus and hunger of that young girl.  I want to be her again.  I want to be that fearless and determined again.

“Don’t be pushed around by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart.” ― Roy T. Bennett

On this Valentine’s Day, I wish you courage.  The courage to open your heart and allow others in.  Be willing to be vulnerable.  Anywhere you go leave a trail of love and kindness!  Let the ones you care know that you do. 

Above all, be amazing to yourself.  Treat yourself with kindness! Do what brings you joy! You are unique, special and deserving of love!

I love you for coming here, reading, liking, commenting, and reaching out to me in other ways.   It brings me joy, warms my soul and it makes my heart sing. It means the world, it makes a difference!  I am grateful!

“Believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.” ― Rainer Maria Rilke

Your love is king, crown you in my heart
Your love is king, never need to part
Your kisses ring, round and round and round my head
Touching the very part of me, it’s making my soul sing
Tearing the very heart of me, I’m crying out for more
Your love is king, crown you in my heart
Your love is king, you’re the ruler of my heart
Your kisses ring, round and round and round my head
Touching the very part of me, it’s making my soul sing
I’m crying out for more, your love is king
I’m coming on, I’m coming
You’re making me dance, inside
Your love is king, crown you in my heart
Your love is king, never need to part
Your kisses ring, round and round and round my head
Touching the very part of me, it’s making my soul sing
Tearing the very heart of me, I’m crying out for more
Touching the very part of me, it’s making my soul sing
I’m crying out for more, your love is king
This is no blind faith, this is no sad or sorry dream
This is no blind faith, your love, your love is real
Gotta crown me with your heart (your love is king)
Never, never need to part (your love is king)
Touch me (your love is king)
I’m coming (your love is king)
(Your love is king) making me dance

Your Love is King – Sade

Online dating blah blah blah

06 Saturday Feb 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 58 Comments

Tags

, , , , , ,

“Trust your heart if the seas catch fire, live by love though the stars walk backward.” ― E.E. Cummings

I signed up for OKCupid.  I haven’t had much time to actually be online, but still I have managed to connect with several people. 

Guy 1. 49 yrs old. Funny and smart.  After speaking a couple of days online I gave him my number.  After the initial pleasantries his first message was an offer to send me a picture of his d.  I declined and said that we clearly want different things.  He said he understood and we continued to text.  But every now and then, he offers to send me a picture. 

Why do I have this perpetual need of being nice? Why do I keep giving people second chances?  I guess I need to listen to Maya Angelou when she says: “When someone shows you who they are,  believe them the first time.” 

Guy 2. 45 yrs old. Smart conversation. I gave him my number.  We texted.  He seemed very interested.  Asked me out.  I said yes.  Then he just seemed to fade.  I am still waiting to hear about tonight’s date.  At this point, 11am, even if he reaches out I am no longer interested.  I guess some people just want to get the date but not go through with that.

Perhaps some people are only after that initial excitement, the thrill of connecting with someone new.  

Guy 3. 58 yrs old. He is all about volleyball.  It is funny because that is all he talks about.  He started playing recently.  I haven’t played since I was 16. He wants me to join his league. I am not sure about that, but I am going on a date with him next week. Well, I am still deciding if I should go or not.

Should I still go on a date with someone that I am not terribly excited about?  Would that be wasting their time?

“Don’t be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have encountered a bunch of catfishes already.  I even managed to give my number to one, before I realized it.  I am embarrassed about that.  I should know better.  I have to pay more attention.  Lesson learned.

Then there are the guys that are all about sex.  I know they want sex.  I want sex. We all do, but why lead with that? Read the room, I mean profile, people!  I want sex but as part of a committed relationship, and I state that in my profile.

Worst of all, at first they want to change my mind.  When that doesn’t work, they try to gaslight me by saying that I am overthinking things, that sex is not all they are about.  Those guys are exhausting!

Then there are the offer of being friends with benefits. It doesn’t appeal to me.  This is no judgement on anyone that enjoys that.  I become attached to people, and I would suffer later.  I know me.

I do reserve the right to change my mind on that.  On anything.  I am evolving as the earth is moving.

“Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)”
― Walt Whitman

I am always open to making platonic friends, but rarely guys on dating site accept that.  Some say they have too many friends. Some agree to being friends, but then just fade away.  I get it.

Speaking of friends.  There are 2 friends that I met on Plenty of Fish. Among all the catfish and other fake profiles I found 2 friends. 

Guy 1.  I have written about him here often.  I call him A-the doctor.  We went on a few dates.  Then he disappeared.  When he came back we became friends.  We go out often to brunch and dinner.  We talk a lot about health, spiritual things, soul, Rumi, etc. Lately, most of our conversations are about Cryptocurrencies. He believes they are the future and that I should invest heavily on them.  

Guy 2. This person, I all call him P-the Investor. I have known him for a couple of years, but I don’t think I ever mentioned him here.  We never met in person.  I will write more about him in a next post.  For now he is a friend that has become dear to me.  Lately our conversations are all about stocks.   He wants me to stay away from cryptocurrencies and focus on stocks. 

At the moment I find myself more interested in reading about stocks then dating profiles 🙂

“If you dare nothing, then when the day is over,
nothing is all you will have gained.” ― Neil Gaiman