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Blessed with a Star on the Forehead

Tag Archives: sparks and fireworks

Weekend date: Part II – Saturday

01 Wednesday Mar 2023

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 45 Comments

Tags

Caribbean food, Krave restaurant, long first date, Park City Utah, Saturday night date, Seinfeld quotes, Shawshank Redemption, skiing, sparks and fireworks, Wordle game

“If I want a long boring story with no point to it, I have my life.” ― Jerry Seinfeld

Here is the rest of my weekend date with M – I need to think of a nickname for him.

On Saturday morning I went to the mosaic studio.  I had missed the prior Saturday because my date from Boston was here. I didn’t want to miss it again.

The plan was for me to decide on something fun for us to do afterwards. He had made some suggestions, but I was undecided.

When I left the studio at around 12:30 I called him and said I would stop by the hotel and pick him up.  He said not to worry that he would drive over.  I assured him that the hotel was on my way home. That way he didn’t need to deal with parking.

“Let’s face it: a date is a job-interview, that lasts all night. The only difference between a date and a job interview is: not many job-interviews is there a chance you’ll end up naked at the end of it. ”― Jerry Seinfeld

My sister joined us for a late breakfast (or early lunch) of Brazilian cheese bread, bagels, papaya, yogurt, pound cakes (marble and chocolate), etc, peppered with a lot laughs. His sense of humor matched my sister’s and I. We played Wordle, quoted Seinfeld, taught him a few words in Portuguese, etc.

After the meal, we went to my sister’s apartment and helped her change some light bulbs.  We came back to my apartment and I was still thinking of where to go in the afternoon.  I thought of some parks, museums or even a ski store, as I have skiing in my mind.  In the end I decided against all of those.

It was just the perfect day to stay at home.  I asked if he would mind if we just watched a movie and then later go out to dinner.  He said that it was a great idea. I proposed we watch Shawshank Redemption, one of my favorite movies that he hadn’t seen it yet.

“Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason” ― Jerry Seinfeld

After the movie, it was already after 6pm, and I was starving.  I chose to go to a place near my home that I had never been to before, Krave, a Caribbean style restaurant.

We shared cod fish fritters, salmon with green beans and mashed potato and fried rice. We took macaroni and cheese home for my sister. We both had wine, him red, I chose white. I almost had the coconut rum cake for dessert, but decided it would be too much. I should have taken to go… oh well.

After dinner, we stopped by my sister’s apartment to drop off the macaroni and cheese.  We chatted for a little while, then came back to my place and watched a couple of episodes of Schitt’s Creek while snuggling on the couch.

I drove him back to the hotel around 10:30.  We said good bye, as he was leaving for the airport early the next morning.

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin” ― Shawshank Redemption

Next time he comes to New Rochelle, I will make better plans.  Still this was perfect, easy, comfortable and fun. There are sparks, but it is not the crazy, exploding fireworks I have been looking for.  It was more like a slow burn, comfortable, familiar, attentive and romantic. One word to describe it, that it is pretty much unexpected for me is: mature. It feels adult, grown up.

We will be seeing each other next at the Salt Lake City Airport.  We will meet up there and drive to Park City to spend a few days skiing. I can’t wait!  He booked the place to stay and bought the lift tickets yesterday. I just booked my flights. I wanted to pay for my lift tickets, but he said it is my early birthday gift.  I am turning 57 on March 28 – arghhh… where has all of those years gone?

This, whatever this is, feels promising, feels good.

“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things.
And no good thing ever dies!” ― Shawshank Redemption

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Sparks may not be enough to cross state lines

21 Tuesday Feb 2023

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life

≈ 27 Comments

Tags

Boston MA, bringing flowers, first dates, long dates, long distance relationships, online dating, sparks and fireworks, tuna sandwich, weekend dates

“Love liberates. It doesn’t bind. Love says, I love you. I love you if you’re in China. I love you if you’re across town. I love you if you’re in Harlem. I love you. I would like to be near you. I’d like to have your arms around me. I’d like to hear your voice in my ear. But that’s not possible now, so I love you. Go.” ― Maya Angelou

Since I have run out of available bachelors in New York State, I have branched out to other states. Just kidding… Maybe not.

BW is 59 years old, works in data marketing and lives in Boston. He looks and acts much younger than his years.  That is a plus.

We had exchanged messages for a couple of weeks, then met this past weekend.  He had to bring his son to New York City, so it was convenient for him to stop by and meet me.

He booked a room at the Marriott Residence Inn for Friday night.  He mentioned he could extend his stay if I wished.  We had dinner at Modern Restaurant, my go-to lately.

He brought me these gorgeous flowers all the way from Boston. Extra points for that.

We got along super great.  There were sparks and tons of laughs. However, I have other things to consider besides chemistry.  

He has been divorced for 2 years and has 2 pre-teen kids.  The kids stay in the family home and the parents take turns.

He is stuck in Boston, and will have a lot responsibility for the next 8 to 10 years.  Do I want to move to Boston? Do I want to be in a long distance relationship for that long?

My other concern besides the distance is that he seems to be dating anything in a skirt.  I question how serious he would be about about dating only one person, near or far.

After the dinner on Friday night, we went by my apartment.  I wanted to show him where it was so he could meet me the next day.  I invited him in to show my mosaics.  And by mosaics, I mean mosaics!

“Distance had an extraordinary power.” ― Virginia Woolf, To the Lighthouse

I gave him a tour.  He left after a few minutes.  The next morning, we met outside my building around 10am.  We were going to walked around town for a little bit, but it was way too cold and windy.  So we just walked to the bakery and the bagel shop, then returned to my apartment.  

We stopped by my sister’s apartment and invited her over for breakfast at my apartment.  It was fun, we all we were joking and talking as if we had known each other for years.

After my sister left, we just spend the time talking and laughing.  Apparently I am a funny person.  Because of the late breakfast we had a late lunch of tuna sandwiches around 2pm.  He thought the sandwich was delicious. 

He left to go back to Boston around 4pm.  I didn’t ask him to stay another night.  He was great company, we had sparks and all, but I thought another night it would be too much for a first date.

He is supposed to return in a couple of weeks.  I want to reflect on this a bit more, before I actually have him return.  

In the meantime, this just happened… just because I mentioned a first date from Friday to Sunday would be too long, what about a first date from Thursday afternoon to Sunday morning?

Yes, that is what is in store for next weekend.  Yes, he is not from NY.  Stay tuned.

“But then why, when talking on the phone, did they quarrel, on average at least once every four sentences? Maybe, though the inspector, it was an effect of the distance between them becoming less and less tolerable with each passing day, since as we grow old – for every now and then one must, yes, look reality in the eye and call things by their proper names – we feel more keenly the need to have the person we love beside us.” ― Andrea Camilleri

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OKCupid sucks, Bumbles rocks. Excited over a first date.

20 Wednesday Oct 2021

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 27 Comments

Tags

Bumble dating, Bumble rocks, excitement over a first date, first date, OKCupid sucks, real blind date, sparks and fireworks

“If I were to wish for anything, I should not wish for wealth and power, but for the passionate sense of the potential, for the eye which, ever young and ardent, sees the possible. Pleasure disappoints, possibility never. And what wine is so sparkling, what so fragrant, what so intoxicating, as possibility!” ― Søren Kierkegaard, Either/Or: A Fragment of Life

Hi everyone, I am stopping by quickly to say I have a date tonight.  Please send me good vibes. This is not just another date.

I just joined Bumble last week. It is so much better than OKCupid and all the other sites I have been on before.  If I were to rate them, this would be the order:

  1. Bumble
  2. Plenty of Fish
  3. Match
  4. E-Harmony
  5. OKCupid

My rating has to do with the matches I made, and that is probably sheer luck.  They all have their share of fake profiles and take time and energy to search through all the profiles.

I have come across only 1 fake profile in Bumble, and all the guys that I have messaged have been polite and real.  Perhaps it is because it is my first week 🙂

Oh, and guess who was the first person that matched up with me?  The guy from the last date.  I don’t get it why he would try to match with me again.

“It is the possibility that keeps me going, and though you may call me a dreamer or a fool or any other thing, I believe that anything is possible.” ― Nicholas Sparks

I have 3 dates lined up, but it is the one tonight that has me all giddy.

This doesn’t feel like just another date.  I am excited about it, and I seldom get excited about dates anymore.

I don’t really know why I am this excited.  If I were to describe a reason, there isn’t really one.   We don’t even know much about each other.  Because I don’t have much information, I was not able to do all my Google research.

We have been exchanging messages for a total of 4 days.  And it wasn’t that many messages.  We didn’t even exchange numbers or spoke on the phone.  And that is perfect for me, as I don’t care for speaking on the phone before meeting anyone.

There is just something about the easy flow of the messages.  I didn’t feel pressured to talk on the phone.  I hate to be cliché, but I do feel like I know him for ages.

There wasn’t a single moment since I scheduled the date when I am coming up with reasons to cancel, as I do 99% of the time.

Tonight is all about a feeling.  Not necessarily a feeling of love, but a feeling of finding a similar soul.  I truly believe I am about to meet a lasting friend.

There something about him, and tonight I will find out.  I hope there are sparks.

“I thank you for your courage to expose yourself.
This courage is needed by everyone because without this courage, you cannot hope for any possibility of transformation – into a new world, into a new consciousness, into your authentic being, which is the door to ultimate reality and to the ultimate benediction.”
― Osho, Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other

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A first date with sparks :-)

21 Sunday Mar 2021

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating

≈ 37 Comments

Tags

always hopeful, expecting nothing, First date success, second date on the horizon, sparks and fireworks

“The very essence of romance is uncertainty.” – Oscar Wilde

He had suggested the Hudson Grill in White Plains.  Instead, I chose Bill and Pete’s in Larchmont because I thought it would be quieter.

I was wrong.  We were seated at a tall table by the bar.  It was pretty loud. There were some people congregating by the bar, happily, singing and dancing.  I guess everyone is just happy to be out again after so long.

He was cute, charming and very nervous.  I was not.  I never get nervous on first dates.  They will either like me or they won’t, it is not a big deal either way.  I knew he would be a nice guy and we would have a good time.

I no longer go on first dates expecting sparks.  I go expecting good conversation and a friendly time.

He is a 56 years old accountant. He is soon to be divorced for the second time. What is up with my meeting men that has been married a couple of times before?

“You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question.” – Albert Camus

We shared a couple of appetizers and a sausage pizza for the main course. The food came in reverse order. All good, it didn’t bother us.

He had Pinot Grigio, I had Prosecco. Towards the of the evening the owner treated us to another round of drinks.

He was cute, funny, clumsy. He almost flipped the table on top of me. It was a small tall table and he leaned over to hear me better. The waitress was passing by at the same moment and quickly held it down. He was mortified.

Later on I had ordered a little ice cream cone with a donut on top for dessert. It was so tiny and cute, I asked him to hold it so I could take a picture. He dropped it. He was again extremely embarrassed.

We talked and laughed the whole evening.  We got there at 6:30 and left at 10pm.  In the end it was clear that we liked each other and that there were sparks.

We have a second date scheduled for Wednesday.  I am looking forward to seeing him again…that hasn’t happened in a long time.

“. . .Looking forward to things is half the pleasure of them.”
― 
L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

TO RECAP: Since joining OKCupid, I have met 4 men:

D, 58 yrs. old, Volleyball fanatic.  We met at Sedona Tap House.  He is a great guy.  Asked me on a second date, but I declined.  He agreed to be friends.

N, 57 yrs. old, CFO. We met at Encore Bistro Francais.  We were supposed to go on a second date but I had the dental surgery.  No sparks, but I thought it would be fun to see him again.

S, 54 yrs. old, Attorney. We met at La Herradura. He seemed very interested but then just became apparently too busy.  No crazy sparks but thought we needed a second date to make sure.

P, 56 yrs. old, Accountant. Described on this post.

I am pleasantly surprised with OKCupid.  I am not a paying member but so far I have come accross very interesting men.  Most of them I have no met yet as they want to wait to get vaccinated.  I may be off the market by then 🙂

Stay tuned…

“I’m not sentimental–I’m as romantic as you are. The idea, you know, is that the sentimental person thinks things will last–the romantic
person has a desperate confidence that they won’t.” – ― 
F. Scott Fitzgerald, This Side of Paradise

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