A post about everything

09 Wednesday Mar 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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Unlike Seinfeld, this post is about everything.

Bali is not enough!

I told the overly excited accountant that I am not interested in a second date.  He said: “It sounds like you have somebody else.”  I said: “No, that’s not it.”

And that is the truth.  Even if I was not interested in the Older guy from the past, I would still be saying no to him.  Being alone is not an issue for me. Being with the wrong person is.

He was a nice guy and he was trying hard. I feel for him.  He said he got divorced because his wife left him for a guy that made more money.  He is now very proud to be making a lot money.  Every conversation is about how well his business ventures are doing.

He was even talking about vacations in Bali.  He showed me the Instagram photos of the villa in Bali where we would be staying in.  All very tempting, but not tempting enough to forget that I know he is not the one for me.

“Rise above the deceptions and temptations of the mind. This is your duty. You are born for this only; all other duties are self-created and self-imposed owing to ignorance.” ― Sivananda

On the way to one month and more

Tomorrow night it will be the fourth date with B.  I will call him B. instead of Older Guy from the Past.  When do I stop counting dates?  Perhaps when it hits one month.  Then I will start counting months, then years.  Yes, I am feeling ambitious.

But no, I am not making any plans more than one date at a time.  The future no one knows, I will know when I get there. For now I am enjoying the infinite possibilities of the present moment.

“You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith and hope.” – Thomas Merton

Peaceful time at work

There were two people at work that really annoyed me.  There was the guy that blocked me.  I thought I had canceled him, but turns out I cannot cancel co-workers on this program. So I blocked him back when he tried contacting me.  He now has to use email to reach me. That has been working fine.

The second was a woman that, one day would act as your best friend and the next would bit your head off.  She would become so defensive that it was impossible to have a conversation.  Things got a little better when she decided to just continuing working from home. She was easier to avoid over the phone.

She was fired this week.  While I am happy I will have peace from her, I feel bad when anyone gets fired.  Her firing had nothing to do with me.  It was due to poor performance.  If she were still bringing money to the company, she would still be here annoying me.

Sending her good wishes. May she find a better fit for her.

“Being agreeable didn’t make people less difficult.” ― Stewart O’Nan, Henry, Himself

It is like looking for a boyfriend, only worst

I am in search of a Primary care doctor.  I never cared for the one I had.  He never discussed anything.  I always felt he was in a hurry.  Am I asking too much for a little more time and attention?  Is it crazy to want a primary care doctor to go over blood test results, especially if some numbers are high?  His assistants were also the worst.

He has been my doctor for the past 4 years. I don’t like changes, but decided that keeping him because I don’t like changes is stupid. Similar to dating, I decided to start looking until I find the right one for me.

Also, on the health topic, I have scheduled an appointment with a gastroenterologist.  Since I contracted covid at the end of December, I have chronic heartburn.  I removed some of the foods that seemed to trigger it, and I keep taking Pepcid AC, Omeprazole, and other medications. Those helped a little.  At this point, my family and friends are worried and want me to have it checked.  I will also be speaking to the doctor about getting a colonoscopy.  I never had it, and I think the time is now.

“Doctors always think anybody doing something they aren’t is a quack; also they think all patients are idiots.” ― Flannery O’Connor, The Habit of Being: Letters of Flannery O’Connor

That is all for now folks!!  Thank you for the joy you give me when you visit!  I offer you a calorie free virtual slice of homemade chocolate cake. ♥♥  I would offer you Godiva Chocolates if I had any 😉

 

Giving it another shot

07 Monday Mar 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, EX Files, Finding Me

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Update on the date, well, dates, with the man that I had a few dates with 5 years ago. 

1st date. Feb 25. We met at Modern Restaurant.  I had a lychee martini, he had chardonnay.  We shared meatballs and zucchini frites.  Everything was delicious.

When I walked in he was sitting at the bar.  I approached him and hugged him hello. I don’t think he was expecting a hug. I had wondered what would be like seeing him after 5 years.  Nothing had changed.  There was still chemistry.

We quickly got started in updating each other.  When we last saw each other, my sister was just moving to the US.  Now it will be 5 years that she is here.  His daughter was starting High School, now she is in college.

He is not struggling with thoughts of the dead wife anymore. At this point he is done with the grieving process and has been actively dating.  I always thought the reason he ghosted me was that he couldn’t forget the wife.

He is the oldest man I ever dated.  He is 65 years old.  I normally get along better with younger men, but, for some reason, there is something about him.

At the end, he drove me home, a whole block away 😊.  At my door, I just said bye and left the car, there was no kissing or anything and it was perfect like that.

“I had to heal… I had to stop trying to nourish my present life with expired moments. I had to move on… So that I could experience new love without being afraid of old pain.” ― Steve Maraboli

On Sunday, Feb 27, he texted me, but I had to keep the texting short as I was getting ready to go to dinner.

On Tuesday, Feb 29, he texted again and asked if I wanted to go to dinner.  I said yes and we decided to meet the next day. He then wrote: “I will pick you up.” 

I said: “oh you will pick me up?”

He said: “yes, you mentioned you don’t like driving”

Stuff like that means the world to me.  It shows that he was paying attention to what I was saying, and to my likes and dislikes. 

People pay attention: Show you care by your actions and not by words.

We went to Rio Bravo, a Mexican Restaurant in Larchmont. I had chimichangas and he had the enchilada. I had a mojito and he had wine.

The conversation flowed and he mentioned that he didn’t think he ghosted me, he thought I was not interested.  In our last date 5 years ago, he said I was mad when I met him for dinner.  He had texted me something more risqué, and I thought it was too much too soon.  Then during dinner my sister called to mention the fire alarm going off, and I said I had to leave.  He thought there was no alarm and it was something that was pre-arranged to cut the date short.

I was shocked as I remembered none of it.  While I definitely didn’t plan on my sister calling to bail me, I am recalling bits and pieces of that evening.  I remember being moody about something. 

He also mentioned that at that point in time, he definitely was not in a mental space to date.  Perhaps we are both in a better space now.  Perhaps we are both older and wiser.

When he dropped me at my door we kissed good bye.  It was short, sweet and perfect.

“New love is grand. Savor all the crazy, muddled might of it.”
― Eli Easton, The Mating of Michael

The third date was on Friday, March 4th.  He offered to pick me up but I said I would drive.  I don’t like driving but it made more sense.  He lives near the place we were going to. 

I rather let him pick me up when the place is hard to get to, and parking is not easily available.

We went to Chat American Grill in Scarsdale, NY.  I had a couple of passion fruit cosmopolitans and he had chardonnay.  That is his drink of choice.  We shared some appetizers of spring rolls, salad and artichoke.   

When we left we walked to his car and he drove me back to mine.  There was some kissing involved.  And it was good. 😊

It is a bit scary to find someone I really like after so long, specially someone that I had a some history with.  I am trying hard not to start sabotaging this, and to give it a real chance. 

I am doing all I can to stay in the moment, and enjoy all as is. It may last or it may not, and that is not the point.  The point is not to waste the moment trying to control the outcome.

“I know you think I’m crazy. Maybe that’s because I am. About life, about this moment, about you.” ― Crystal Woods, Write like no one is reading

Pay me no compliments, tell me no lies!

03 Thursday Mar 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating

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On Sunday I had a first date with the accountant that lives over an hour away in NJ.  He hit traffic, so it turned into an even longer drive.  He kept me informed along the way.  We ended up meeting an hour later than expected.

Unbeknownst to him, he picked a place within walking distance from me, Alvin and Friends, so his lateness was not a problem for me.  The food was great, I had ribs.  Yes, I had ribs on a first date!  He had the rosemary chicken.  Both delicious! 

The drinks were awful.  Later I saw that there seemed to be no bartender, the hostess appeared to be making the drinks. I sent my drink back.  I also mentioned to the waitress that they got my date’s order wrong.  He thought it was cute that I was “defending him”.  His words.

I am not a complainer and normally don’t make a big deal about things, but when it seems that the wait staff is not paying attention and is just careless, I will speak up. Politely.      

Getting back to the date.  He is better in person, in all senses.  He was handsome, funny, and very intelligent.  The conversation was great.

BUT, there is always a but!  He paid me compliments!  Yes, how dared he!!! Lol

I mean, he paid me too many compliments.  Yes, there is such a thing.  He went on and on, on how I was beautiful, smart, fun, etc.  He said that I was animated and talked with my hands.  He said my happiness was contagious. He would look at me with puppy eyes and marvel at how beautiful I was. It was over the top. 

The next day, Monday morning, he texted me at 7:03am, see below.  I made a point of not replying until later.

His enthusiasm is definitely too much too soon. This hurry, this sense of urgency, smells of despair and neediness, and that is not a great smell on a man, or anyone, for that matter.  It makes me feel it is not about how great I am, but instead, it is about how needy they are.

I think he is a great guy, but this hurry, just makes me want to run.  With the experience of that last guy, I am not even telling him to slow down anymore.  I am just talking to him tonight,  wishing him luck and moving on.  They may say they can slow down, but they really can’t. 

Romance not available, friendship only: Take it or leave it

02 Wednesday Mar 2022

Posted by in Daily Life

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One Seventy Nine Bar and Grill

One Seventy Nine Bar and Grill

“He had the look of one who had drunk the cup of life and found a dead beetle at the bottom.”  ― P.G. Wodehouse

It was a very busy weekend.  On Friday I met the guy I had a few dates with 5 years ago. On Saturday I met someone as a friend, or so I thought.  On Sunday I had a first date with the accountant that lives over an hour away in NJ. 

I am going to talk about Friday and Saturday on a next post. Today I am going to write about the guy I met on Saturday.  He is this one:  https://blessedwithastarontheforehead.wordpress.com/2022/01/26/old-fashioned-much/

I thought he understood when I explained that I wanted to have a friendship.  After that post, I started ignoring any time the texting and calls got too much. Eventually the texting slowed down, and there were no calls. I felt he was no longer making me the center of his universe.  It seemed we could be friends after all.  

When he said we should do something fun, like going to a Drag Queen Show I accepted and said I was bringing my sister. On Saturday when we realized that we had missed the show, he said we should go to dinner instead.  

We went to a new restaurant in town. Dinner was a lot fun.  The food was delicious.  I had hanger steak, my sister had a creamy pasta with vegetables and he had the osso buco.  The cocktails were okay.

The next day, the texting, along with pictures, and calling, started again.  Finally, last night, when he called me yet again, insisting that we should spend Saturday or Sunday together, I realized that I had to talk to him again about being just friends.

“The more tenuous the ties that hold us together, the easier it is to say goodbye. -[Julia, ‘Harbour of Love’]”
― Rosamunde Pilcher, A Place Like Home: Short Stories

I told him I didn’t want to spend a whole day with him and send him the wrong message.  What proceeded was just weird, as it seemed he went through various stages of the grieving process.

At first, he seemed surprised when I said that there was no romance in our future, and that friendship was all I was offering. As if that was the first time I ever said that. He seemed to imply that I was the one that had reached out to him, after he had given me space.  I disagree, but I let that go.  Who did what at this point is meaningless. 

I felt he needed to speak and somehow rationalize the situation.  I just let him speak with minor interruptions.  If I am letting someone down, I normally don’t like splitting hairs.  All that is important is that he gets the message.

“we have a deep desire to feel heard, and to know that others care enough to listen.” ― Douglas Stone, Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most

Where did the chemistry go? He asked at one point.  I wanted to say: you killed it with all the calling and texting, too much too soon.  I did end up saying something like that.  I said I felt overwhelmed with the attention. I did.

He implied he couldn’t have a friendship because when he meets someone he devotes all his energy, implying that he wouldn’t have time/energy for a friendship.  I said that I respected that.

I let him go on and on.  I am not sure if he was trying to convince me to stay or him to go, but whatever it was, after 20 minutes I was feeling drained and annoyed. The worst thing someone can do is to try to convince me to ignore my feelings.

When I wished him luck on finding someone else he asked me if I had any leads and to let him know if I had any friends.  Then he added: “I would do the same for you if I knew what you wanted.”

He has a point.  I don’t know what I want, but I know it is not him.  He is a great person, but not for me.  

The takeaway for me is twofold.  First, most of the time when a guy, that is so infatuated like he is, says he is okay with friendship, he is really not.  He just thinks that the more time we spend together, I will end up falling in love. Second, be explicit next time.  In trying to spare his feelings, I may have given him false hope.

“Observe the behavior of the butterfly, and chase no one, for they will only elude you.” ― Michael Bassey Johnson, Song of a Nature Lover

Tonight I am going on a second date with one of those two other guys: the one from the past or the one from NJ.  Stay tuned…

Imagine, Hope and Pray

27 Sunday Feb 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message

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Sending prayers to the people of Ukraine and to all around the world that are suffering and feeling unsafe.

Imagine-John Lennon

Imagine there’s no Heaven
It’s easy if you try
No Hell below us
Above us only sky

Imagine all the people
Livin’ for today
Aaa haa

Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too

Imagine all the people
Livin’ life in peace
Yoo hoo

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man

Imagine all the people
Sharin’ all the world
Yoo hoo

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will live as one

 

My dating life, or lack thereof

25 Friday Feb 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating

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“If someone is able to show me that what I think or do is not right, I will happily change, for I seek the truth, by which no one was ever truly harmed. It is the person who continues in his self-deception and ignorance who is harmed.” ― Marcus Aurelius

I haven’t gone on many dates lately, just a drink here and there.   I am busy with work, and most of the guys I have been matched with don’t seem to be good matches for me.

Most guys are either too young or live too far.  Some of the older ones are retired in Florida.  I am not moving to Florida any time soon, or ever.

Then, there are the usual jerks.   As an example, there was this one guy that asked if I was vaccinated.  I said yes.  He then replied:

“I need to be with someone who is intelligent enough to see through the narratives. Look at what they’re doing in Canada now. Martial Law.”

I was shocked.   There is really no response to that.  I just closed the chat.  

This, to me, is not about being pro or against the vaccine, but about people being so judgmental, inflexible and unwilling to have a conversation about different opinions; or the assumption of a different opinion.  

For the record: I don’t mind talking about the vaccine.  I was vaccinated because I felt I had to.  Once I got the 1 dose of JNJ, I felt it was the right decision for me at that point.  I have not gotten the booster yet.  I am still on the fence, leaning towards not getting it.

I got covid in December and I am still struggling with some remaining issues: heartburn, mental fogginess and anxiety. Would it have been worst without the shot? 

“I am what I might term an unprejudiced sceptic. I am not given to either believing or disbelieving things ‘on principle,’ as I have found many idiots prone to be, and what is more, some of them not ashamed to boast of the insane fact.” ― William Hope Hodgson

Moving on. Some of the guys that I am talking to and deciding if I am going to meet or not:

The hypnotist:  I am afraid he will hypnotize me.  I am scared he will turn me into a chicken or worse, make me believe I am so in love with him. Kidding/no kidding.   He gave me his whole information and I checked him out.  He is legit.    

The very young and very cute:  There are a couple of them.  They are both in their early 40s.  I am not.  Is it worth meeting guys where the relationship will go nowhere?  Probably not, but they have been so charming and, so far, saying all the right things.

The wordy accountant:  I may meet this one on Sunday.   I am not sure.  He lives over an hour away, but says he doesn’t mind driving to my area.  He is going on and on about the fact that he is looking for a long-term relationship and not a one night stand.  Is he trying to convince me or himself?

“Potential requires exploration.”
― Laurence Galian

***

Tonight I am going to have drinks with someone I went on a couple of dates with, 5 years ago.  I wrote about him in a couple of posts.  He is the guy (widower) that I mention towards the end of this post:

https://atomic-temporary-33385295.wpcomstaging.com/2017/06/07/what-is-so-bad-about-being-being-positive/

It is just a drink to catch up.  He was a nice guy, but reading back I realized that he kind of ghosted me.  I am keeping an open mind.  But I am doubly cautious about embarking in anything.  I keep saying I want to make new mistakes…

“The past is never where you think you left it.”
― Katherine Anne Porter

“Happy Woman Having an Off Day”

21 Monday Feb 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Mosaic and other crafts

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I love, love, love this piece. It came out of nowhere. This is a piece that makes me feel that I do have a creative bone in my body.

As I was organizing some glass pieces for another project a saw this face materialize in front of me. I abandoned what I was going to do and decide to finish the face.

The same day at the studio, there was a woman that I often see there.  She has been doing mosaic for years, and does commission pieces. 

She is always talking, always having fun.  We have a good time together.  On that day she was quiet and gloomy.  She was not her usual self.  She said that there was not a specific reason, she was just having an off day. 

It was definitely a different energy with her being so quiet.  I was trying to make jokes and cheer her up.

For some reason the tiles in front of me made me think of her.  Perhaps the pained, sad look and the short hair.  I announced that I was naming the piece after her.  

She was so happy.  I could see glimpses of her usual self returning.  She said that there was never anything named after her, and she was over the moon.   

Fast forward a couple of weeks. I was at the studio working on this project and another woman heard that I had named this piece after her friend.

She said: “It doesn’t look like her.” I said: “I know.  It is not supposed to look like her.  It is just the idea of her.” 

She appeared a bit annoyed, but didn’t say anything.  Later on, she said, out of the blue: “People should be careful about naming pieces after people, specially since it doesn’t look like them.”

I said: “She knows and she is happy about it.”

She then said: “Sometimes people hide their feelings.”

What? I was so shocked with that statement.  I said: “I am sorry you think that way.  I will ask her about it.  There is no way that I would do anything to hurt her or anyone.”

I was going to ask the woman herself about it, but then the studio closed for 2 months and I haven’t see her again.  For now the piece is nameless.  None of my pieces have names, but for some reason I feel this one needs it. 

For now the name is “Happy Woman Having an Off Day”.   I welcome ideas for a different name.

Since when the world got so sensitive? It is just a name on a piece. It is not a portrait, and not meant to look like the person.  It is meant as a compliment, just a fun and nice gesture.

I feel her friend created an issue where there was none.  But, I guess, I could be wrong. I have been wrong before 🙂

I have learned a lesson. Well, I am trying to learn the lesson.   I am very impulsive, and often say what comes to mind.  Naming the piece right then and there was an impulse.  I can’t assume that everyone would be okay with that.

Toning myself down is hard. I was not intent in causing pain. But, as they say: The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

In the meantime, I had to hold back tears when the woman told me that I was perhaps insulting and hurting her friend. Who is the sensitive now?

“And why is it, thought Lara, that my fate is to see everything and take it all so much to heart?”
― Boris Pasternak

 

Skiing Day at Hunter Mountain

14 Monday Feb 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Finding Me

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“If everything seems under control, you’re not going fast enough.” ― Mario Andretti

I hope everyone had a great Valentines Day! Around here it was uneventful. No flowers or Godiva chocolates ☹ Not complaining, just stating a fact.  

On Sunday I had the skiing date. Well, it was not really a date, I should just say: I went skiing with a friend.  There was not a word or gesture of romance, and I am happy about that.  We are definitely perfect as friends.

I left home very early Sunday morning and stopped by his lake house, that it is half way to mountain.  He had been staying there since Friday. He showed me around and from there we drove to the mountain.

It was a beautiful drive.  We talked and joked as if we have known each other forever. There was no lack of topics to talk about.  He has lived in many other countries and has many stories to tell, but he was also very interested in listening about me and my stories.

Hunter Mountain is a beautiful area located in the northern Catskills Mountains.  As far as skiing is concerned is neither the best best nor the worst I have been to.  It was very cold, and towards the end of the day there were some ice patches on the trails.

“A gentleman is someone who does not what he wants to do, but what he should do.” ― Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

He was such a gentleman in every way.  He was concerned about the fit of my boots, asking the rental guys to have me try different ones, even though I had brought my own.  He wanted to drop me off near the entrance and then go park, but as faith would have it there was a perfect spot right there where he was going to drop me off. He carried my skis for me. At all times he was concerned about my comfort level.  It didn’t feel too much.  I felt taken care of.

Speaking of comfort level, why do I love skiing?  Everything about the sport is painful.  The tight boots on the slopes, walking liking Frankenstein’s monster across the parking lot.  Carrying the heavy skis. Wearing the many layers of clothing. The expensive lift ticket, well, everything is expensive on the mountain.  The long lines to get on the chair, long lines everywhere really. And let’s not forget the cold.

“Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature’s peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop away from you like the leaves of Autumn.” ― John Muir, The Mountains of California

Still,  I adore it!  Being on the mountain feels very freeing, and yet so challenging to me.  I forget about everything.  My only thought is to get down the mountain, and then go up again.  I fear the speed, and yet I love it when, by chance, I speed up a little.  Those few moments between gaining speed, and then feeling like I am totally out of control are priceless. 

Getting back to the day.  He has been skiing forever and is a great skier, so he was able to teach me a lot.  He corrected my form, we did some drills, he gave me tips.  He was so much better than most of the skiing instructors I have had in the past.  In the end I noticed some progress.  He said he did too. 

He said I can go skiing with him any time I want.  He is at that mountain every week. I am not sure I would make the same trip again.  It was too much for one day only.  Total driving time of almost 5 hours.  Perhaps I will go back for a couple of days.  For day trips I am searching for places closer to home.

I made a friend and I skied.  Life is great!

“Do not compete with others! Pick a high speed for yourself that suits high ideals and try to catch and surpass that speed!” ― Mehmet Murat ildan

A non-date date

11 Friday Feb 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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“If you don’t do it this year, you’ll be one year older when you do.” ― Warren Miller

I had a quick date on Wednesday night.  I met this guy months ago on OKCupid.  I am not longer on that site.  He left the site first and gave me his number so we could keep in touch.

I eventually texted him and we started exchanging messages.  Even though we live only 30 minutes apart, it was hard to make plans to meet until now. 

We chose to meet in Bronxville, NY.  It is has a charming downtown.  We were going to meet at Starbucks, but when I got there he was standing outside.  They had just closed.  It was good thing. We walked around and found a better place.

“I feel the need to endanger myself every so often.” ― Tim Daly

The place we found is called Slave to the Grind. It reminded me of coffee shops in skiing resort towns, which was apropos since this was more of a skiing date, then a romantic date.

Let me explain: One of the reasons that we connected was our love of skiing.  Mine is more of a platonic love, since I seldom ski, and I am not really good at it.  His, is a full blown love affair. He has been skiing since he was 10, and still races from time to time.  

I just found out yesterday that he has a home in Whistler, BC, which is my absolute favorite place on earth! Icing on the cake!

He is over 60 years old, but I don’t remember his exact age, and didn’t want to ask again.  He looks younger in person.  Taller than me, bald, smart, cultured and personable. He is involved in international business.  Mostly retired now, he does some consulting on the side. 

“Cross-country skiing is fine as long as you live in a small country.” ― Steven Wright

We started talking as if we have known each other for years, and not just months of texting.  It was not a long date.  We mostly talked about our backgrounds and of course, skiing.

He invited me to go skiing on Sunday and I said yes.  I think he can teach me a lot.  I am hoping to get a few pointers and perhaps gain more confidence.

Even though he is a great person it seems that we are both more into being skiing friends than anything else.  It felt more like meeting a skiing buddy than a potential boyfriend.  I think that, at this point, I am more excited about finding a skiing partner than a love match. 

Before I forget, I had the mocha with oat milk and a scone.  The mocha was delicious and the scone was bad.  Is tasted old, I don’t think they make their own baked goods. I would go back for the coffee. He had a cappuccino, which I believe he enjoyed. 🙂

Skiing report coming on Monday!  Wish me luck!

“The problem with winter sports is that — follow me closely here — they generally take place in winter.” ― Dave Barry

Being taken for a ride, almost

09 Wednesday Feb 2022

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message

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“Some people stand and move as if they have no right to the space they occupy. They wonder why others often fail to treat them with respect–not realizing that they have signaled others that it is not necessary to treat them with respect.” ― Nathaniel Branden, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

This week I thought I would have more time to write and to take care of some things I had planned, but, you know what they say about plans…

My co-worker had a family emergency, so I had to add her functions to my list of things to do.   I canceled most of what I had scheduled for this week, but I kept a car appointment and a quick coffee date tonight.

My car appointment yesterday left me thinking that I was being taken for a fool. I hate that feeling.  The feeling that you can never let your guard down.

I went in for an oil change and was offered all kinds of extras, that I may or may not need.  I said no to $1,340.00 worth of services. I said I just wanted to do the oil change and would decide on the extras the next time, which I think is what I said last time.

They send me coupons all the time, but normally when I am about to get the oil changed, I never find them.  This time a coupon had just arrived the day before.   I showed him the coupon and said I would like to use it.  He said that the coupon was for a specific oil that it was not what my car takes. But there was another coupon with it, that it would get me a discount and instead of $1,340.00 I would have to pay only $1,072.00.

I tried to argue and ask why was I sent something that I was not going to be able to use.  The coupon specifically mentioned my car.  He said that it said so in some small print.

He said that he would still give me a promotional fee of $59.95.  The coupon was for $39.95.  Not wanting to argue and needing to get to work, I just said ok, go ahead.

Still feeling annoyed, I added, can I have my coupon back?  As he handed it to me, I said: “I want to make a few phone calls and give Honda a piece of my mind.  This is false advertisement, or some type of bait-and-switch scam, but whatever it is, it is not right.”

He then said. “Don’t worry about it, I am going to talk to my manager and we can give you that price”.

Stuff like that makes me mad.  The upselling, the misleading, anyone trying to get one over the next guy.  Does this happen to me because I am a woman, or perhaps I just look like an unsuspecting fool?

As a side note, do you know what type of services is really necessary for a 5-year-old Honda HRV with only 13,000 miles?

Thank you for visiting today 😊 May your day be blessed! ♥

I will come back tomorrow and report on my quick coffee date tonight. 

“There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn’t true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.” ― Soren Kierkegaard