“Life is a long preparation for something that never happens.” –―
Amazing what a difference a couple of days makes. On Friday I was all excited about the third date with J. this weekend.
Now, Monday morning, I am sitting here wondering what happened. Ok, I am not wondering too much. I am used to online dating. I have learned to expect anything, everything and nothing. People are fickle.
But really, what happened? Is it an issue with communication? Expectations? No, I think it is just a case of “he is just not that into me”.
The truth is easy and simple: if nothing is happening is because there is no interest.
We had 2 great fun dates. We laughed, joked and ate great food. He seemed interested. We text many times throughout the day, every single day. We still do. He is texting me as I write this.
On Wednesday he asked me when we would see each other again. I responded: ”When you ask me out again”. He replied: “Perhaps this weekend if you are not too busy”. I said: “as of now I am completely free”. To me that is a big open door, all he has to do is walk through it. He didn’t.
Patience is a conquering virtue.” –
We continued texting. Friday night came and went, then Saturday, then Sunday. He never mentioned going out. I didn’t ask.
I cannot say I was disappointed, but I was surprised. And of course, I am curious.
My sister said I should have called on Saturday morning and asked if we were going out. I didn’t want to. I just went about my life. I don’t want to be forcing a guy to go out with me.
As we were texting throughout the day yesterday I wrote: “I thought I was going to see you this weekend . He answered: “me too”. He proceeded to text me pictures of his dog.
At one point when I asked how was his Saturday night, he said he went to fix his mother’s toilette.
I know that I could have been the one to ask him out. I would have and have done in the past with other guys, but it never turned out well. I end up realizing that the guy didn’t really want to see me again to begin with and I felt like I was forcing the situation.
“That was the thing about the world: it wasn’t that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn’t expect.” ―
I am looking for a man that is more “take charge”, specially in the beginning. I am aggressive by nature. I go after what I want. But in regards to dating I like the man to take the wheel, otherwise I will, and then resent him for it. I will become the boss of the relationship, in charge of everything. I don’t want that. Was he waiting for me to say anything? Who knows. The truth is that if he was, then we are not a match.
I will be clear with a guy about my interest. No one has to read my mind. But I want him to step up and make the plans, at least in the beginning. Wrong or right it is what I want and need.
Will there a third date? Who knows? All he has to do is ask. I want to tell him: “You better strike while the iron is hot” 😉 because is getting cold by the minute.
Things are exactly the way they should be. I am learning to just let nature take its course and not force anything.
I continue learning, getting better and happier!