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Blessed with a Star on the Forehead

Tag Archives: Eastchester

A date here and there. A drink here and there. Fun always and everywhere.

17 Friday Jun 2022

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating, EX Files, Finding Me

≈ 38 Comments

Tags

Arepa Mania Restaurant, City Island, Coming back from the past, Dubrovnik Restaurant, Eastchester, New Rochelle NY, NY, open doors and open hearts, Sea Shore Restaurant, Tapas & Cucina Restaurant

City Island, NY

City Island, NY

“What is past is past. never go back. Not for excuses. Not for justification, not for happiness. You are what you are, the world is what it is.” ― Mario Puzo

I should listen to Mario Puzo.  I think you realize by now that I have a problem closing doors.  I keep believing in redemption and second chances. Or perhaps I just think that the person will one day realize how amazing I really am.   I am getting better though.  I am slowly realizing I don’t have to talk to everyone. I don’t have to let everyone back in.  I don’t have to be nice to everyone. I don’t have to be friends with everyone.

“Even a spineless arthropod shed what’s no longer useful and leaves it behind them.  Are you not greater than they?” ― Jason Versey

I am deciding which online dating site I will be signing for next.   It will probably be Match.  While I decide and find the time to fill out a profile and upload photos, I have been busy with friends and some guys from the past.

There is this one guy that I don’t remember what name I gave him here.  I actually don’t even remember if I wrote about him.  Several years ago, we had a late-night date at a diner.  Immediately it was friendly and not romantic. 

Since then, he will call or text  a couple of times a year.   There is nothing interesting about his conversations.  It is all about him complaining about being busy and gloating about making a lot money.  He will always say that we need to get together and that he will call me to schedule.  He never does.  By now, I don’t even want to be friends anymore. 

I have his name on my phone as “Waste of Time”,  that should tell you how I feel about his texts and calls.  Finally, I got tired and blocked him on Messenger. 

The other day he found me on WhatsApp.  After exchanging a couple of messages, I blocked him there too.  It is the same song and dance.  He is not even friend material.

From now on I have to remember to block people on both, Messenger and WhatsApp.

“Memory takes a lot of poetic license. It omits some details; others are exaggerated, according to the emotional value of the articles it touches, for memory is seated predominantly in the heart. The interior is therefore rather dim and poetic.” – Tennessee Williams

Kremšnita at Dubrovnik Restaurant

Kremšnita at Dubrovnik Restaurant

Then there is Mr. Stock: https://blessedwithastarontheforehead.com/2021/09/10/the-prelude-to-the-unmasking-of-mr-stock/

We had a great time at that dinner over a year ago. I thought that he would ask me out again.  He never did.  Still, we continued the texting/talking relationship.  I was okay with that because we have become good friends.

Last Friday he asked if I wanted to go out to dinner.  I was surprised.  I like to eat, so I said yes.  I don’t mind last minute invitations.  If I am free, I go.

We went to Dubrovnik’s in New Rochelle.  He drove over 1 hour to take me to dinner.  He said that it took him hours to get the courage to ask me out.  I found that weird, and told him that.  I don’t get what the fear was. Later I understood that he thought this was a date.

During dinner he hinted that he now feels ready for a relationship… with me.  I was honest and said:  Been there, done that!  I told him about B., and how they are similar in the fact that they are both widowers and were not ready to date when we originally met.  I told him I am not making that same mistake again.

I also said to him that I believe that if a man really likes a woman, he doesn’t wait 1 year to ask her out on a second date.

He tried to give me all sorts of excuses, but I was not moved.  Friendship is the only thing on the table for him.

We continue to be friends.

“There exists in man a mass of sense lying in a dormant state, and which, unless something excites it to action, will descend with him, in that condition, to the grave.” ― Thomas Paine

Another guy, G. from a neighboring town reached out this week on WhatsApp.  Are people all of a sudden discovering WhatsApp? He mentioned that we met on OKCupid last year.  I was cautious as I didn’t remember anything about him.  I asked him if he had changed phone numbers, as he was not on my contacts.  He said that he didn’t.  I was only able to remember him when he sent me a picture.

I asked why we had stopped communicating and he said that I went to Brazil to visit my parents and never got in touch again. That is very possible.

I went through my records.  Yes, I do keep dating records.  It does come in handy. On my notes on him, I wrote: “Seems nice, but doesn’t seem to be that interested. Divorce is not final yet.”

On my notes I have a different phone number for him.  I will keep that in mind and ask him about it when we meet for coffee on Sunday. 

“Potential has a shelf life.” ― Margaret Atwood

On Saturday (Jun11), a friend, my sister and I went to a new Venezuelan restaurant in my town called Arepa Mania.  They had live music, and the two singers were great.   Do you know when restaurants open too soon, before they are ready?  That was the feeling I had.  Still, it was good, the owners were very pleasant, the music fun, the food good, but I think they have room for improvement.  After, we went for drinks to Modern Restaurant.

Cocktail at Modern Restaurant

Cocktail at Modern Restaurant

On Thursday (Jun14) we went to City Island, NY to Sea Shore restaurant.  The views were incredible, the service was great, but the food was just ok. The best for me was the free corn bread that they serve at the beginning.

Last night (Jun15) we took a friend to dinner at Tapas & Cucina in Eastchester, NY.  We had the most amazing time.  I have enjoyed their food, ambiance and service the past two times I had been there, but this time they added music to it.  They had an Italian singer, and it was great.  It was her birthday and the singer came and serenated her.  She was over the moon.

Yes, I have been busy 🙂

“We don’t know where we’re going, but isn’t is fun to go?” ― L.M. Montgomery

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Cautiously optimistic about a 3rd day in the horizon

22 Monday Nov 2021

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

Eastchester, foot in my mouth, Happy Thanksgiving, limoncelle cake, love match in the making, NY, Second date success, Tapas and Cucina

“Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect.”
― Margaret Mitchell

Update: Well, not much of an update, but the potential love story with the funeral home owner is dead.  He still sends a hello every now and then.  He asks about my schedule for a second date, but fails to make plans.

I don’t like that.  I no longer have an interest in him.  Anyone that is interested will make plans or tell me why they can’t.

***

“Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird,
That cannot fly.”
― Langston Hughes

Second Date with A. IT guy

Date: Saturday, November 20th, 6:30 pm

Location: Tapas and Cusina Restaurant, in Eastchester, NY

Drinks: He had 2 glasses of red wine and I had 2 glasses of passion mimosa (passion fruit juice with champagne)

Food: We chose a bunch of small plates: eggplant rollatini, meatball marinara, fried potatoes with garlic mayonnaise (the best!!), croquettes, fried sardines with salad, pulled pork and beef with polenta. 

Dessert: Limoncello cake.  Turns out he doesn’t care for that much lemon 🙂

We arrived in the parking lot at the same time, and from there we walked to the restaurant. It was a charming small restaurant. We waited 5 minutes while they arranged a table for us.  

We ordered some small plates as I described above.  I thought it would be more fun to share food rather than to get our own entrées.  Plus, I always have food envy.  I always think that the person I am with ordered better than I did.

“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.”
― Emily Dickinson

I had a great time, and I think he did too. It was even better then the first date. Plenty of conversation and laughter.

He remembers every single word that comes out of my mouth.  He remembered details that I mentioned in passing about my childhood. Perhaps I am impressed because I don’t remember anything that people say to me.  I find myself asking the same question 2 or 3 times (I know, embarrassing! I need to do better)

When the coffee he ordered came, before the dessert, he handed me his coffee spoon. When I looked at him quizzically he said: You don’t like to eat your dessert with big spoons so take this one just in case they only bring a big spoon.

Little details like this melts me.  He remembered that from the first date. They did bring huge spoons with the dessert and I happily had my little spoon.  

We talked a lot about so many different things.  On the first date I felt I only talked about myself, so on this date, I enjoyed getting to know more about him, his sons, his work, etc. 

There were so many little instances of magic and joy. There were moments that I wish I could bottle that feeling, that look.   There were also plenty of moments that I wish I hadn’t talked too much, that I had not revealed exactly what I was thinking.   He did mention that I don’t have to filter or edit myself.  Unedited Ana can be a handful, too much, too in your face, too impulsive, too impatience.

“Listen to the mustn’ts, child. Listen to the don’ts. Listen to the shouldn’ts, the impossibles, the won’ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me… Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.” ― Shel Silverstein

On the date he mentioned wanting to see me again.  He also mentioned he likes to take things slow. He is not much into daily texting and such.  That is a needed adjustment for me. I am used to believing if I don’t hear from someone daily, then they are not interested.  And that is not necessarily the case, specially at this early in the game.

I feel that meeting someone that wants to take things slow is a good thing for me.  It is the Universe forcing me to face the fact that I need to slow down in everything.  Things are not on my timing.  I don’t need to hurry anything, because they will either happen or not, in the right time.  The divine time, as I like to call.

At the end of the date, we walked to our cars that were parked next to each other. As I stood there on the sidewalk next to my car to say good bye, he stepped back on the street saying that that way we would be at eye level.  I laughed and said he was calling me shorty.  He is 6’1 and I am 5’4.

There were a few kisses 🙂

When I got home he texted me at the same time I was texting him.  We will be making plans after the holiday, as I am going away today for a little road trip to CT, RI and MA.  

Just now he texted me to wish a good trip and happy Thanksgiving. We shall see.

And on the note, I wish you guys a wonderful Thanksgiving.  May it be with family and friends,  and have lots of food and fun!  May you have a lot to be grateful for.  

I am so grateful for having this blog and meeting so many amazing people.  You enrich my life in so many beautiful ways. Forever thankful! ♥♥

“There is neither happiness nor misery in the world; there is only the comparison of one state with another, nothing more. He who has felt the deepest grief is best able to experience supreme happiness. We must have felt what it is to die, Morrel, that we may appreciate the enjoyments of life.
” Live, then, and be happy, beloved children of my heart, and never forget, that until the day God will deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is contained in these two words, ‘Wait and Hope.”
― Alexandre Dumas

 

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My instincts were right: The first Bumble date was a hit

21 Thursday Oct 2021

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

≈ 43 Comments

Tags

dreaming with a baby, Eastchester, Gigante Restaurant, great first date, kissing on the first date, the meaning of dreams

“Throw your dreams into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country.” ― Anais Nin

We met at 7:30 at Gigante Restaurant in Eastchester, NY

Before I actually met him there were a couple of hiccups.

First, as I got to the door of the restaurant, a gray-haired man came and opened the door.  I thought he was my date, but I wasn’t sure because of the gray hair.   The guy I was hoping to meet had dark hair in his pictures.  We exchanged greetings, then he asked: “Do you want to fix your hair?”

When I looked at him quizzically, he added: “Do you want to go to the ladies’ room?”

I said: “I guess I need to fix my hair.”

He said: “It looks fine to me.”

After going to the ladies’ room to check on my hair and making sure my hair was fine, I was met in the lobby by the same man and now he had the hostess with him.

I said I was meeting someone, and the hostess said: “Oh yes, there is someone waiting by the bar.”

“Hope is a waking dream.” ― Aristotle

As I am walking towards the bar they were both walking with me.   In front of the bar there are some couches.  The man pointed to a guy sitting on the couch and asks me: “Is this him?  I said: “I don’t know I never met him before.”

I could only see the back of the guy’s head, and he had dark hair so I thought it could be him.  I go around the couch and with a big smile I say hi. The man looked up at me and just stared.

At the same time, I hear my name from the other end of the bar.

I look over, and there is my date by the bar,  laughing.

I burst out laughing.  Everyone is laughing. I wanted to find a hole and just hide in it.

I went over and we hugged.  We both couldn’t stop laughing.

My date said: “That was cute.  I am glad that we got the awkward moment out of the way.”

The man with gray hair felt bad.  He offered to take us to the most romantic table he had.

I still don’t know who that gray-haired man was, perhaps the owner or manager, but he was definitely dressed to go on a date and not to work in a restaurant.

“I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours..” ― Thoreau, Henry David

My date was well dressed. He had khakis, a nice dress shirt and a sports jacket.  I had a blue blouse, jeans and high heels.

The restaurant was beautiful. It was large, modern, beautifully decorated for Halloween with spider webs.  Sounds weird, but it worked.   The atmosphere and service were perfect.

He had a beer, and I had a the Gigante Spritz.  It was a cocktail made with raspberries, Pinot Grigio, Stoli Raspberry, St. Germaine and Prosecco Rose.  It was delicious.

For appetizer we had Crispy Chicken Parmesan Rolls.  It was a chicken egg roll and it was delicious.  For the entre, I had the Chicken Milanese.  I wasn’t going to have chicken again but the waitress mentioned being their best dish.  It was indeed delicious.  My date had the filet mignon and it was perfect.  He shared some with me.  For dessert I ordered a mango panna cota. I ordered it because of the coconut whipped cream and the berries.  I wouldn’t order it again.  But it was so pretty I took a picture of it.

During the date we talked about everything and nothing.  I don’t think we found out too much about each other’s past.  But in a way, it felt right, it felt light and unburdened.   This is different for me than other dates.  Normally I ask so many questions and come away knowing a lot.

I found out that he has been divorced four years.  Because of his two daughters he hasn’t dated at all until now.  One is in college, and the other will be going very soon.

We are both Aries. He is an adrenaline junkie. We both love massages and quote Seinfeld. He is self-assured but unassuming.  I normally don’t get along with Aries guys, but in this case it seemed to work.

We talked about sex, actually, the lack of sex in our lives and how we want to change that. We both think similarly on the topic. It needs to be meaningful. I introduced the topic.

There were tons of sparks.  At the end, he walked me to my car.  He asked me for my number. And when we hugged goodbye, we kissed.  I am not a big fan of kissing on the first date, but it seemed the perfect way to end this date.

He later texted to say thank you, and this morning again he said thank you for the great evening.

I had to describe him with only one word it would be: gentleman.

I am sure we will see each other again.

“I have dreamt in my life, dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas; they have gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the color of my mind. And this is one: I’m going to tell it – but take care not to smile at any part of it.” ― Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights

**

On another note.  I woke up at 4am from a nightmare and couldn’t go back to sleep.  I had a dream that I was entrusted to take care of a newborn baby. All of a sudden, I realize that I had not been giving the baby a bottle.  I remember feeling a terror inside that the baby was probably going to die or was already dead, because of my neglect.  I hurried to warm up the milk for the baby. The baby looked like he was sleeping serenely all wrapped up in a white blanket.  Or perhaps it was already dead?  I alternated thoughts of “the baby is dead” with “the baby will be okay”.

This dream really messed me up this morning.  I should have been dreaming of rainbows and butterflies and not potentially dead babies.

“Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.”― Louisa May Alcott

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