With that in my mind I try to be more conscious of all my blessings. Of that I have tons and there is no bigger blessing than opportunities.
Lately I have been feeling that I am on a roller-coaster. Between being busy and bracing myself to be busy I am not fully experiencing and enjoying anything. I am also not taking advantages of opportunities and just accumulating stress.
In Brazil we have a saying that loosely translated means: “I was happy and I didn’t know it”
So many times we don’t realize how good someone or something is, until they are gone. When don’t honor the people around us, we are not grateful for our jobs, for the food on the table, etc. Am I taking things for granted? That I am sure of it!
All that came to mind today when I realized that this is the last year I will be working in Manhattan. It is a done deal, we will be moving out of NY City. Have I taken advantage of the fact that I have been here every single weekday for the past 19 years? Did I take enough bites of this Big Apple? Chances are I have not.
I have done a lot, gone to many shows, restaurants, bars, events, etc, but there is still so much I haven’t done. So many museums, galleries, shows, sights, etc that I left for later. It was all here, easily accessible, and yet so many I kept postponing.
What if later never comes? Can I come to NY again after I stop working here? Yes, absolutely, but not as easy and seamless as already being here.
Why do I worry so much about missed opportunities? While worrying I miss new ones. The key is to stop worrying about that and focus on not missing new ones. And if I can’t find need ones I need to go about creating new ones.
I need to slow down and be aware of every moment. A lot of my time is spent looking at the past or planning for the future. I guess I am a combination of anxious and depressive. And that is not a joke, it is a realization.
What I want written on my headstone is: “She never let an opportunity pass by. She was blessed and she knew it”
“There was another life that I might have had, but I am having this one.” – Kazuo Ishiguro
While I ponder all that is left to do in NYC before I no longer work here I may be able to cross some items off of that list in the next couple of weeks. Tomorrow at 6am I will be at JFK airport picking up a friend from childhood and her husband. He is coming to NY to run the NYC marathon. They don’t speak English and they have no clue of what they want to do while here. So it will be up to my sister and I to entertain them for 10 days.
My aunt, God Bless her soul, used to say: “Guests are like fish. After 3 days they start to stink.”
I will keep you guys informed on how bad this stench gets. All kidding aside what I dread most is the absence of my routine.
“Help others without any reason and give without the expectation of receiving anything in return.”-― Roy T. Bennett
On the subject of where and when to go skiing I came up with the following: Skiing in Keystone in the first week of December. I didn’t book anything yet, but I feel good about deciding at least where and when. I also plan on something overseas in February.
“It does not take much strength to do things, but it requires a great deal of strength to decide what to do.” ― Elbert Hubbard
Be aware, be in the moment, be happy! Slow down and get going!