Tags
boyfriends and friends, car buy or car lease, Montana, online dating, skiing in Big Sky, taking chances and being safe, to go or not to go
It has been a little awhile since I have been here so I am about to catch you up on my dating life, but here is what else is going on:
- Car doubts. After many car issues, I finally decided I need to get another car. I am still keeping my 30 year old baby (560SL) but it is about time to get a car that fits more than 2 people and it is good in the winter. I am not sure if I should buy or lease? I hardly do any driving so I am leaning towards lease. Any opinions?
- Tenants/Buildings issues. I need to learn to not stress over minor maintenance issues. Any time I see the superintendent’s number when my phone rings my heart sinks as I know he is going to mention some problem. I need to decide what to do in July when the lease is up. Do I just sell it or keep it longer? I have time to decide…
- After 32 years of living apart my identical twin sister and I will have to learn to live together again. She will be coming to live in USA in the next few months and she will stay with me until she gets settled, a job, etc. It will be interesting for sure. We would die for each other but after 5 minutes together we are already bickering.
- Work remains a blessing even though there are some crazy egos and situations I have to navigate through. It makes me stronger and wiser.
Now on to dating:
Regarding the 2 guys I mentioned on this post: https://atomic-temporary-33385295.wpcomstaging.com/2016/12/24/from-feast-to-famine-in-48-hours/
The counselor: After we had those disagreements we started talking again and now we are not only good friends but we are dance partners. We are taking private Salsa dance lessons together. We bought a package of 10 lessons. It has been a lot fun. He is so funny.
I explained I am no longer interested in romance and he respects that. We are planning to go to dance clubs once our dancing improves, well mostly his. I am Brazilian so moving my hips is easy. For him it has been a little more difficult. But he has so much enthusiasm that it makes up for the lack of rhythm.
The Pharmacist: We started talking again after that day. And for a second it looked like we could become friends.
One Sunday he asked me what I was going to do that evening and when I said that I was going out to dinner with a friend he volunteered to come with us and pay for dinner. I agreed.
Then he said he was going to come up to my apartment and watch me get ready. When I said that it was not going to happen, he said he would sit and wait in the living room. Again I said: It is not going to happen. He got upset that he would have to wait outside my apartment and said he was not coming anymore. I said ok and we haven’t spoken since.
I hate when guys assume that after meeting me once or a couple of times that I am ready to invite them to my apartment. There is no right time, but it is on my time not on theirs.
***
The construction worker: I haven’t mentioned him before and I would probably not mention him other for the fact that he invited me to go skiing with him in Big Sky, Montana. He has a hotel room with 2 beds. It is very tempting and I even reserved a flight. United lets you reserve the rate for one week. I have to decide by tomorrow. I am dying to go there. I am dying to go skiing. But, I don’t want to put myself in an uncomfortable situation. Even though he agrees this would be just friends, I barely know him. I am so conflicted!!!
***
Online dating can get tiring and frustrating. It is full of users, losers, jerks and fakes, but among all of that there are still some good guys there. I have managed to meet some of them. As always be careful when online dating. Safety first!
I have met men from all walks of life. I met computer software designers, all kinds of salesmen, financial guys from banking, insurance, etc, construction workers, lawyers, doctors, musicians, teachers, etc. I am thankful for online dating for making it possible for me to meet different people.
The last few dates I had:
- A businessman in the denim business. I was already picturing all the free jeans I would get 🙂 The date was okay. We spent the whole time talking about online dating. Any time that is the topic of conversation it is a sign things are not going to work. We had only drinks. Yes, he was cheap lol
- A Retired lawyer that occupies himself with some kind of electronics components distribution. We had dinner at a great restaurant. He seemed excited about me but I am not sure about him. I don’t think it will go anywhere. Funny fact, well funny for me, his children are in boarding school. I had never met anyone that had kids in boarding school.
- A South American food importer. A very nice guy, but every time he spoke he touched my knee. I know it is the South American familiar way but I didn’t care for that. Also it was hard to understand him and my Spanish is not great. I am a talker, so conversation is a big deal for me. It is not going anywhere.
- A restaurant owner that was just a bit too old for me. He is 64. I am not ageist but it didn’t seem he could keep up with me and I don’t have dreams of retiring in Florida. Nothing against Florida either.
This week and weekend I have a friend from Brazil staying with me so there was no dates, but next week there will be 3. Stay tuned, if anything interesting happens you will be the first to know.
You are awesome! The sooner you realize that the better. Breath, be happy, be positive, eat chocolate, life is great, no need to stress, everything passes!
Wishing you all a blessed weekend! 🙂
“Dare to Be
When a new day begins, dare to smile gratefully.
When there is darkness, dare to be the first to shine a light.
When there is injustice, dare to be the first to condemn it.
When something seems difficult, dare to do it anyway.
When life seems to beat you down, dare to fight back.
When there seems to be no hope, dare to find some.
When you’re feeling tired, dare to keep going.
When times are tough, dare to be tougher.
When love hurts you, dare to love again.
When someone is hurting, dare to help them heal.
When another is lost, dare to help them find the way.
When a friend falls, dare to be the first to extend a hand.
When you cross paths with another, dare to make them smile.
When you feel great, dare to help someone else feel great too.
When the day has ended, dare to feel as you’ve done your best.
Dare to be the best you can –
At all times, Dare to be!” – Steve Maraboli
I think you’re doing great. The skiing trip! Here’s my male opinion! He’s reserved a room for two beds means he intends to sleep with whoever joins him in that room. Get a room of your own. Is that possible? Otherwise, be ready for physical sports, and I don’t mean skiing.
I think you’re doing a great job. the dance lessons sound wonderful and it’s fun! Oh, go with the lease. You’ll get a mileage factor…12,000 miles for a five year lease or something of that sort. If you don’t go over 12,000 in five years, it’s great. The car is in good shape. You’ll never have to worry about break down or battery failure, or tires. Insurance is a bit higher, but you’re well covered. and the the note is low! If you like the car, pay the residual at the end of the three yr/five yr term and it’s yours. The trick is to NOT go over the.mileage allowance.
Go for it. And I’m sure you and your sister will work things out. I’m feeling positive about that. 🙂
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Hi Paul. Yeah, the skiing, very tempting but in the end there is only one physical sport I am interested in on that trip, so I am definitely leaning towards no.
Psychologically I always liked the idea of owning, but I am leaning towards the lease for the reasons you have pointed out. Thank you for the positive feelings regarding my sister, it warms my heart. Wishing you a blessed weekend! 🙂
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Do you know that I always “star” your posts BEFORE I read them?! It’s because I know I will like it and I haven’t been wrong yet. I’m so glad you’re blogging onto the new year even if you don’t have a steady beau … Part of me is afriad once you find that special guy you won’t be writing as much! Good for you and sad for us! So keep dating and telling us your stories! 😁
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Oh Elizabet, that is so sweet!! I am glad that you enjoy reading the glimpses into my life. I think that single life is suiting me fine for now, the fun is all in the search. But no worries if and when I find someone I will make sure to write all the details here and share it with you. Thank you so much for always being there (here)! Many blessings to you! 🙂
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Wow, that’s some update. I’m not sure what to comment on first. I think I’ll go with the auto lease question. I lease and highly recommend it, especially for someone who doesn’t drive much. The longer you own a car, the more money you have to put into it to keep it maintained, and it never made sense to me to pour money into something that depreciates in value every day.
Enjoyed the poem, by the way.
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I know, all of a sudden the post got so long… Lease is starting to make a lot sense to me, thank you for helping me in my decision. Wishing you a blessed weekend! 🙂
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Enjoyed reading your post. Yes online dating can be fun, but I am glad that you know to be safe about it as well. My nephews found their wives through online dating and they are wonderful, so it can pay off 😉
I would steer clear of the skiing trip unless he would let you get a room of your own. Ugh on the guy that dropped you just because you wouldn’t let him into your apartment! But sounds like you are better off without him if that is how he is.
Love the dancing lessons, have fun!
Hope things can go well with your twin! I am sure you will learn how to give each other their space and I bet you will love being together again.
Have a great week-end!!
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What nerve of the pharmacist to assume that and not respect your boundaries. I wouldn’t speak to him again, either. Online dating is another thing – like you said, full of liars and fakes – and it’s so time consuming.
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Indeed! I hate people that take those liberties and then get mad when they don’t get their way. I am so glad I never heard from him again. Online dating is,sometimes, like a second job, but for now I am still willing to try. Many blessings to you! 🙂
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I am the same way with my sister!
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I am really making an effort to work on things. She thinks I am too critical, so I am watching what I say. I know that things will work out fine, but it will require some work. A blessed weekend to you! 🙂
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Bu the time you read this you will have already decided on the ski trip. I would hope you don’t go, but I understand. Just because someone tells you they have a hotel room with 2 beds doesn’t mean they are safe.
The rest of the post was very good; this was just the part that worried me.
Scott
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Hi Scott, no need to worry, in the end I couldn’t take a chance. So I am going alone to Breckenridge, even though the doctor now says I shouldn’t be skiing. Still I am going for the views, relaxation and change of scenery, since all is already paid for, and I declined to get the insurance. Hugs! 🙂
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Sounds like a plan.
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🙂
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Thank you so much for being open with your dating life! It gives hope for me that someday I’ll be able to figure out what I want in a relationship. 🙂
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You are welcome! Figuring out what I want is the hard part, so in the meantime I figuring out what I don’t want. Right I am actually trying to figure out if I actually want a relationship. Best of luck to you and many blessings! 🙂
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Wow! Definitely following after that post 🙂 feel free to check out my dating chronicles. ❤
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Thank you! I will! Blessings! 🙂
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“I am Brazilian so moving my hips is easy.”
👀 👀 👀
“Then he said he was going to come up to my apartment and watch me get ready. ”
Whoa. That’s kind of putting the carriage before the horse.
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haha, no effort at all…
online dating… there are all kinds… I could write a book
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Well, get writing then! 😉
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I may have to dedicate a whole chapter to you if you keep reading all my posts 🙂
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haha! What will the chapter be called?
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too early to tell
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That’s a strange name for a chapter.
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No chapter for you then!!!
lol, too early to think of a name for a chapter that has just begun, it could turn into a comedy or a horror story. It will not be boring!
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Well, I’m looking forward to it.
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but really, now that I think about it, don’t you think that giving Mr. Tips a chapter of my still unwritten book would mess up his ego? You may end up with a big head lunatic in your hands.
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I’m sure that if you should use his likeness in that chapter – yes. His head would swell to epic proportions.
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and is that bad?
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What? That you should use his likeness in the chapter?
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haha
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😉
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