Monthly Archives: December 2021

Ghosting is not okay!

09 Thursday Dec 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating

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“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.” ― Andy Rooney

After I published the last post, I received a reply to my text:

The rest of the text reads: “soon as I felt it, but it just very recently has happened.”

At least he replied, but I still think that was a rude and coward move. I guess he was never going to say anything.  Ghosting was his chosen way to end things. 

Why leave me thinking that he is going to call? Why not contact me?  Why leave someone in limbo?

Am I being unreasonable to expect someone to let me know that they have changed their mind?  

I have no expectations after one date, good or not.  But if I have 2 dates that were great and the person keeps in touch and mentions a third; in that case I believe we have something and expect at least a courtesy text.

What saddens me, is not the rejection, but the fact that people think this is an acceptable way to treat each other.   It will never be acceptable to me.

I will not behave in such way, and I will not accept it as being okay.  I will continue to conduct myself in dating, as I do in life, with kindness, respect and thoughtfulness. I will continue to let the Golden Rule guide me.

I should write an online dating etiquette guide. I believe a lot people are just clueless, and perhaps not mean spirited. 

Onward and forward.  Stay tuned, the next post is about my date last night.

“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” ― Roy T. Bennett

So it goes, So it goes…

06 Monday Dec 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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“Great minds have purpose, others have wishes. Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortunes; but great minds rise above them.” ― Washington Irving

Well, Well, Well… here we are again.

The IT/Teacher guy was supposed to reach out to plan a 3rd date. We last exchanged texts on Thanksgiving Day.  I have not heard from him yet.  Chances are I will never hear from him again.  This is not my first rodeo!

He did say that he is not the type to be constantly in touch, but this is a bit out long.  At this point I am not sure if I will reach out or not.  Well, as I come to this post to publish it, I texted him.  No reply yet.  We shall see, if I get silence or an excuse.

Once again, after two great dates, the guy disappears. Is the Universe playing tricks on me? Should I just give up on this whole dating thing? Should I start thinking there is something wrong with me?

“My manner of thinking, so you say, cannot be approved. Do you suppose I care? A poor fool indeed is he who adopts a manner of thinking for others! ” ― Marquis de Sade

NO, NO and NO! None of that!!!  a) The Universe is being the Universe, forever a wise guide, sending me lessons and teachers. b) Online dating is not for the faint of heart. I can take it, and keep going better and stronger.  c) I am not one to get discouraged and/or to start thinking there is something wrong with me or that I am doing something wrong. I am perfect! 🙂

These disappearing acts have nothing to do with anything that I have done or not done.  They were just not the right guy for me yet.  But, with each disappearing act, I feel I am getting closer. 

“And the little prince broke into a lovely peal of laughter, which irritated me very much. I like my misfortunes to be taken seriously.” ― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

Happiness is the journey and not the destination, isn’t that what they say?  And I wholeheartedly agree.   Even with the occasional disappointment of not hearing from someone when it all seemed so perfect, even with an occasional jerk, even with so many fake profiles, I still enjoy the journey.

I enjoy going on dates, meeting new people, discovering new things about myself and others. What I enjoy most of all is that feeling I get when I detect potential and possibilities.

“Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.” ― Voltaire

I am happy dreaming of the possibilities. I am in love with the potential. I am excited about first dates with great men; and sometimes not so great men.  If they never call again, it doesn’t mean they are less amazing, but that they are more amazing to someone else.

And, as fate would have, I am now excited about a first date tomorrow night.  Do I dare say that it seems so right?  I dare!

And so it goes, so it goes. 

Nothing better than good food and good friends

01 Wednesday Dec 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message

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“If you’re reading this…
Congratulations, you’re alive.
If that’s not something to smile about,
then I don’t know what is.”
― Chad Sugg, Monsters Under Your Head

Happy December!  Last month of the year, can you believe that?  I can’t.  This year has been a blur, similar to 2020.

Will 2022 be different, or will the craziness just continue, or even get worst?

Last week we met friends in Westerly, RI and Framingham, MA.  We spent time at Foxwoods in CT and Encore in Boston.  We had great meals and so much fun. Perhaps a bit too much eating.

I took no pictures anywhere, except at Encore Casino in Boston.  I am just awful at remembering to take pictures. 

Some good meals were had at Guy Fieri’s Foxwoods-CT, Mystique Encore-MA, Bridge Restaurant Westerly-RI, plus both of my friends cooked divine meals. And don’t let me forget Shake Shack 🙂

If you are ever near Marlborough, MA, you need to stop by a Brazilian bakery called Deg’s Cakes.  Try the Pao de Queijo (Cheese bread) and Bolo Prestigio (chocolate cake with coconut filling and ganache frosting). 

“We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.”
― David Mamet, Boston Marriage

“We have the choice to use the gift of our life to make the world a better place.” ― Jane Goodall

“Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.” ― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

“Every man who has shown the world the way to beauty, to true culture, has been a rebel, a ‘universal’ without patriotism, without home who has found his people everywhere.” ― Chaim Potok

“It’s so hard to forget pain, but it’s even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Diary

“At this very moment enormous numbers of intelligent men and women of goodwill are trying to build a better world. But problems are born faster than they can be solved.” ― B.F. Skinner, Walden Two

“One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.”
― Virginia Woolf, A Room of One’s Own

“Don’t Just

Don’t just learn, experience.
Don’t just read, absorb.
Don’t just change, transform.
Don’t just relate, advocate.
Don’t just promise, prove.
Don’t just criticize, encourage.
Don’t just think, ponder.
Don’t just take, give.
Don’t just see, feel.
Don’t just dream, do.
Don’t just hear, listen.
Don’t just talk, act.
Don’t just tell, show.
Don’t just exist, live.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart