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Deciding to just love and not look back is hard but it feels wonderful!

I decide to see the ex every now and then, well it is pretty much when he wants.  I know that that sounds awful.  Sound like I am being used and settling for second best, but I don’t see it that way.  I see it as enjoying and cherishing the love we still have. We are not together as a couple for a variety of reasons.  It was mostly his choice not to work on this relationship and focus on his business and other situations.  Do I fault him? Do I think he never loved me enough? Yes, a big resounding yes, but I am choosing not to dwell on it.  I am choosing to accept his company and affection whenever possible.  At the same time I am not altering my schedule or previously made plans to accommodate him.

It is my plan to, little by little, to give you my background, so you will have a better idea of who I am and how I got here.

Learning to enjoy life without the pressure to follow society’s norm and ideas of when one should be married, have kids, etc is not simple.  But I am managing to do it.  Not always pretty and painless.

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