I can’t lie I am very excited about seeing ex tonight. We will probably go out for a bite, come back to my apartment, I will make my delicious popcorn and we will watch a movie.  Of course there will be sex at one or various points during the evening.

I am giving myself permission to enjoy ex and his presence.  I know everyone, and I mean everyone disagrees with me and thinks I am setting myself up for heartache.  Well, my heart I already broken.  When I was moving out of ex’s house I though I was going to die, that is how painful it was.  There will be no other pain like that. I was a basket case, calling my sister, that lives in another country upwards of 10 times a day.

So now, I see as enjoying the calm after the storm. I braved through the storm, why not enjoy the calm?

to be continued …