I am looking at the search for love as a battle. The prize is finding my true soul-mate (and I accept no imitations!)
After losing a war, when do you get back in the battlefield? I am probably going against the majority when I say you have to get back as soon as possible! Before you allow the task to seem too daunting!
I have lost a lot of wars and perhaps I will lose a few more, but with each one I gain more knowledge about what kind of warrior I am. With each loss I don’t lose faith, I gain assurance that I am one step closer. Each war lost is a step towards the goal; it is one road block removed. It is an impostor gone, making room for the real thing.
I may retreat for a moment to regain my energy and equilibrium. I cry, I pray, I make adjustments, I improve and I get back on the horse.
With such high stake on the line I cannot afford to be too scared or too tired to fight. Taking too long to re-start the battle makes the task seem insurmountable. If I stay away too long I may become intimidated, I may think my enemy is stronger than I am. I may develop self defeating thoughts. If I allow such thoughts to populate my mind I have lost the battle before I even started.
The search for a partner does not mean unhappiness. I am happy alone. The search for a partner means that I believe in romance and fairy tale and I am not willing to let that go no matter how difficult the battle proves to be. I want someone to be my refuge and fortress and I want to be his. I want to slow dance this long song called Life with someone special!
I don’t need a partner, I want one! Is it my right? No! Is it my obligation? No! It is a pleasure and a dream that I am willing to go after and fight for! Well, in a way I guess it is a need, since my heart needs love to survive!
So I show up ready for a fight! And I use all weapons that God gave me.
I don’t spend any energy thinking about what went wrong in the past. So perhaps I could have done things different, not revealed my game so soon, noticed the signs, but why stay there in the past? The past losses are not the center of my memories. I look at how well I fought even when I lost. I look at how I fought with integrity and not taking shots below the belt. I take the good moments in the battlefield, I count my losses and I move on.
And I spend even less time worrying about what can go wrong in the future. All around us are people and things trying to defeat us, so I make a point of being in my own corner, of being my own cheerleader! I am positive and think I can win until I the last bell has sounded. I look at the bottom line, I think at what I am about to gain! Above all I enjoy the battle itself, that maneuvering and outmaneuvering that goes on like an intricate dance! For a warrior battle is life!
I also like to think that by not staying away from the fight I am honoring God and Life. God gave me a heart full of love to give. God made passion my essence. I am not going to negate my true self to appease the ones that think it is too soon or it is too much of a long shot! I like challenges, the harder I have to fight the sweeter will be the taste of victory!
Hey Universe, hear me loud and clear: I still believe! I don’t doubt love for a moment. I am ready, willing and able! I will be in my deathbed believing my true soul-mate is somewhere out there and he will eventually, not only find me, but fight for me!
shhh! Do you hear that? oh, it is just the Universe conspiring to give me what I want!