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Daily Archives: December 12, 2020

Tis the season … to passively aggressively assert myself

12 Saturday Dec 2020

Posted by A Star on the Forehead in Daily Life

≈ 35 Comments

Tags

Christmas spirit, holiday decorations, just going along, passive aggressive

“Among my most prized possessions are words that I have never spoken.” ― Orson Scott Card

Since we moved into the new office in May, I have become friends with the lady from the office down the hall.

She is nice and stops by often to chit-chat.  She is always offering me a ride home. I have accepted a couple of times.

Yesterday I saw her in the hall.  I mentioned to her that I got inspired by her Christmas decorations and decorated my office.  

Seeing her big beautiful tree through the glass door did inspire me.  In my old office I stopped decorating for the holidays. I grew tired of everyone and their opinions.  Now, most of them are working from home or in our other offices.

Yesterday morning, on the way to work, on the spur of the moment, I stopped at the dollar store and CVS.   I was going to order items from Amazon but there is a delay on deliveries at the moment and I didn’t want to wait.  I got only a few things that I was able to carry as I was on foot.     

“Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” ― Benjamin Franklin

I was very happy with my purchases and how they looked when I put them around the office. Next year I will plan and do better, but for now I am content.

Later in the day, the neighbor lady stopped by to see my decorations and to bring me a couple of little lights and strings of red beads leftover from her decorations, which I thought it was nice.  She added those to the little tree and then proceeded to move around some of the other decorations.

I was a little taken aback and didn’t know how to react.  I just watched.  I didn’t like the way she was rearranging things but I was mostly amused by it at the time. 

“Nothing is ever quiet, except for fools.” ― Alan Paton

But it did bother me.  When I got home I told to my sister about it.  We agreed that we often do that.  We put up with certain things/people because we don’t want to appear ungrateful.    

I don’t think she realized that it was annoying. I should have told her that I liked the way things were as I had done them. 

I am a tell it like it is person.  I don’t like confrontations, but I have no problem in standing up for myself.  I have been known to have shouting matches with the brokers when I think I have been disrespected in some way.  Still, why am I so passive in certain situations? 

This morning I walked in and rearranged some of the decorations as I had before.  I kept some of what she did, but changed what bugged me most, which was where the 2 big figures stood.  

She stopped by this afternoon and didn’t say anything.  I am sure she noticed it.  

I feel better.

“You should have spoken up sooner.” her grandmother answered. “No need to bear pain unless you have to.” ― Cynthia Voigt Homecoming

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