accepting it all, almost was and perhaps will be, believing the unseen, Sherlock Holmes, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, trusting the unknown
“Never trust to general impressions, my boy, but concentrate yourself upon details.” ―
I thought that today I would be telling you all about my date yesterday. Unfortunately the date never happened!
As I was about to start getting ready for the date I got a phone call from my date. He said he was calling from the emergency room. He gave me the hospital name and emergency room number. He said he didn’t suppose I wanted our first date to be in the hospital. I said that it was a possibility.
“Evil indeed is the man who has not one woman to mourn him.”―
I wouldn’t be opposed to go there to see him, but I know that most hospitals now aren’t accepting visitors because of COVID. He kept me informed throughout the the evening and night as to what was going on.
He went to the hospital because of a pain on his leg. He had just finished physical therapy on it a week ago. I will not mention the nature of his injury at this point. It is a kind of a wild story, that I rather know the details for sure before I mention anything.
“Life is infinitely stranger than anything which the mind of man could invent.”
At the same moment my friend A. texted me to wish me luck on the date. When I mentioned that he had canceled, my friend asked me if I was disappointed. The weird thing is that I am and I am not. Lately, when it comes to dating I have been totally okay no matter what happens.
Or perhaps deep down inside I already thought it wouldn’t happen so I was ready for it.
All is exactly as it is supposed to be. Of course I am curious, but I am not letting curiosity get the best of me. Time will tell. Everything will be revealed in time.
“What one man can invent, another can discover.”―
By 1 am his friend picked him up from the hospital. Supposedly he was treated for blood clots and sent home.
He has a lot baggage, a lot history, and a lot medical issues from the baggage and history that he brings with him. Can I handle all of that is one huge question that I have even before we meet? “Can” is not really the right question. I can handle anything, the most important question is do I want to?
“As a rule, the more bizarre a thing is the less mysterious it proves to be. It is your commonplace, featureless crimes which are really puzzling, just as a commonplace face is the most difficult to identify.”―
In the meantime he is absolutely the most romantic, more interesting guy I have met in a long time or perhaps ever. His life experience is so different than my own it is both enticing and scary.
This morning he sent me the following:
I Need Love – LL Cool J (cover by Luke Bloom)
When I’m alone in my room sometimes I stare at the wall
And in the back of my mind I hear my conscience call
Telling me I need a girl who’s as sweet as a dove
For the first time in my life, I see I need love
There I was giggling about the games
That I had played with many hearts and I’m not saying no names
Then the thought occurred, tear drops made my eyes burn
‘Coz I said to myself look what you’ve done to her
I can feel it inside, I can’t explain how it feels
All I know is that I’ll never dish another raw deal
Playing make believe pretending that I’m true
Holding in my laugh as I say that I love you
Saying amor, kissing you on the ear
Whispering I love you and I’ll always be here
Although I often reminisce I can’t believe that I found
A desire for true love floating around
Inside my soul because my soul is cold
And half of me deserves to be this way till I’m old
But the other half needs affection and joy
And the warmth that is created by a girl and a boy
I need love
I need love
I wanna kiss you, hold you never scold you just love you
Suck on you neck, caress you and rub you
Grind moan and never be alone
If you’re not standing next to me you’re on the phone
Can’t you hear it in my voice, I need love bad
I’ve got money but love’s something I’ve never had
I need your ruby red lips sweet face and all
I love you more than a man who’s ten feet tall
I’d watch the sunrise in your eyes
We’re so in love when we hug we become paralyzed
Our bodies explode in ecstasy unreal
You’re as soft as a pillow and I’m as hard as steel
It’s like a dream land, I can’t lie I never been there
Maybe this is an experience that me and you can share
Clean and unsoiled yet sweaty and wet
I swear to you this is something I’ll never forget
I need love
I need love
See what I mean I’ve changed I’m no longer
A play boy on the run I need something that’s stronger
Friendship, trust honor respect admiration
This whole experience has been such a revelation
It’s taught me love and how to be a real man
To always be considerate and do all I can
Protect you you’re my lady and you mean so much
My body tingles all over from the slightest touch of your hand
And understand I’ll be frozen in time
Till we meet face to face and you tell me you’re mine
If I find you girl I swear I’ll be a good man
I’m not gonna leave it in destiny’s hands
I can’t sit and wait for my princess to arrive
I gotta struggle and fight to keep my dream alive
I’ll search the whole world for that special girl
When I finally find you watch our love unfurl
I need love
I need love
Girl, listen to me
When I be sittin’ in my room all alone, staring at the wall
Fantasies, they go through my mind
And I’ve come to realize that I need true love
And if you wanna give it to me girl make yourself seen
I’ll be waiting, I love you
“A man always finds it hard to realize that he may have finally lost a woman’s love, however badly he may have treated her.”―