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being supportive, constructing not destroying, follow your bliss, follow your passion, following your dreams, kind criticism, the beauty of dreams, watering dreams
“Be careful what you water your dreams with. Water them with worry and fear and you will produce weeds that choke the life from your dream. Water them with optimism and solutions and you will cultivate success. Always be on the lookout for ways to turn a problem into an opportunity for success. Always be on the lookout for ways to nurture your dream.” – Lao Tzu
A very good friend of mine is developing a product that he hopes to sell in stores very soon. It is a food item and he asked me to taste a prototype. Before tasting it I told him that I was going to be brutally honest. He insisted on it.
While sitting in his car last night and while he anxiously watched I proceeded to taste it. First I smelled it, looked at it, and then took an initial bite. There wasn’t really much aroma to it. I took a few more bites and started writing down my thoughts about it. How did I feel about the taste, texture, sweetness?
Even before I finished my evaluation he started reading my findings. It was not all positive. I found that I couldn’t really detect a flavor – not that it had one to be detected. He mentioned this will be an original flavor and then with time there will be flavor varieties.
I also thought it needed to be sweeter. I am one of those people that likes to taste salt if something is savory and sugar if something is sweet. I also thought that it left somewhat of a coating in my mouth and tongue and perhaps a bit of an aftertaste.
Even with all that said it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I am not a fan of this category of food anyway. While it didn’t offend me taste wise it also didn’t excite me, but none of the items in that product line do.
“Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird,
That cannot fly.”
―Langston Hughes
Later on while I am in bed trying to go to sleep I started thinking about my criticism of his product. He has been working on this for years. How would I feel to hear all that about something I was working on?
I was honest. I am proud of that fact, but is there such a thing as too much honesty? I could be wrong, very wrong. I started second guessing myself. This is very subjective.
It could dishearten him. What if my opinion gets him to lose his determination? I would hate for someone to change a winning formula because of me. Or worst, to give up on their dreams because of me.
I also didn’t want to lie and say I enjoyed something I didn’t.
This morning I wrote him. I told him that maybe I was too harsh. I have food issues and his customer base will be the ones that see food as fuel and not as pleasure as I do. I told him that he and his dreams are important to me and he should follow his gut, heart and dreams.
“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” – Paulo Coelho
He was kind in his reply. He said I was overthinking this. He said that he wants this product to attract the masses, especially the people that are not concerned with their nutrition – the ones that need it the most – according to him. He thanked me for my feedback and said there will be more tasting in the future.
He added: “If you choose to stay up and barely sleep thinking of me you can certainly do so. I find it very flattering!”
It got me thinking of dreams and the determination that takes to follow them. I appreciate those people that have a passion and go after it. I envy them. Specially the ones that get criticized and get no after no. It takes passion, love, heart, and a thick skin.
What about my dreams? I am floundering, toying with this and that while the days go by. Where is my passion? Did it show up and I didn’t recognize it? Or is it still coming?
Once the product is in production I will let everyone know what it is.
“When you know someone’s dream you look at that person differently—with more tenderness, respect, familiarity, sympathy, and generosity than before. Look at everyone you meet this week and actively think to yourself, “I wonder what their dreams are?” – Danielle LaPorte
I feel like if I did have dreams/passion at one point, they may have gotten run over by a bus.
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oh no Ashley! We have to change that! We need to find them, give them CPR and get them back to live.
If those dreams are long lost then we need to create new ones. I cannot imagine not having dreams and yet it seems that is how I have been living for the past few years.
So let’s make it our goal to dream up new dreams!
Thank you for stopping by and sending you many blessings! 🙂
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Thanks 🙂
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any time 🙂
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it’s good to say things as it is, but temper it with a bit of healthy concern. People want to know the truth, because truth is what good decisions are made on, but they also appreciate the consideration that goes into presenting that truth. That’s a tough balance.
I really liked the Paulo Coelho quote. Needed that. 😉
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It is indeed a tough balance that I don’t manage well at times.
Sometimes a person doesn’t want the truth. They just want someone to agree with them. I don’t normally do that well.
I have been trying to exercise more kindness.
Thank you for stopping by and commenting!
Wishing you a blessed weekend! 🙂
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I’m not to much of an agreer if I don’t agree either. I find myself struggling for words sometimes in these situations. If I have to be plain, so be it, but if I don’t, sometimes mums the word.
Have a great weekend as well! Hope the weather is nice in your part of the world
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It is indeed hard to agree with something we don’t. In that case we feel we are betraying ourselves.
It is best to be silent, specially if the other person is expecting an agreement.
Today is a rainy Monday, I do enjoy rain and I don’t like to complain so it is all good.
Wishing you a blessed week! 🙂
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Thanks. Good thoughts, and enjoy your week as well. 😉
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Thank you! 🤗
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I think you really helped him and he appreciated your honesty. I wish more people would be honest and stop worrying about hurting people’s feelings.
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I will always worry, but will always err on the side of the truth!
Thank you and wishing you a blessed week! 🙂
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You are a kind and sensitive person, honesty is always best. Your friend was prepared and doesn’t sound as though he will be deterred by honest criticism. I like this, thank you!
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Thank you so much! I try, but sometimes fail miserably at being sensitive to people’s feelings 😦
My friend has a thick skin and will keep going.
Wishing you a blessed weekend! 🙂
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💐
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I love flowers! Thank you!
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I love that emoji😍
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🌺🌻🌷🌼
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Of course you found them all 🌸
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hahaha, I found more than that on my cell but didn’t want to be a show off lol
now on my laptop so no emojis
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Yeah mine too not much on windows
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Your friend is wise. You should be brutally honest as the general public will and won’t care how much $ was spent. Also, there should be others taste-testing it, hopefully as honest as you. One person’s opinion should not make or break an idea.
My first book submission was sent in and came back with so much red on it, I thought the reader died of blood loss. He hated the book.
I set that book aside for a long time. I have since read it again and found it not as lacking as he stated. I should have someone else read it. However, I have moved on and been published in the horror-short story field and am happy with that.
Scott
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Hi Scott
There were more people testing it, so I am sure he will not base it all on my opinion.
I am glad you didn’t let one editor’s opinion deter you.
The creative arts is a very subjective field and rejections are the norm.
Keep on writing!
Wishing you a blessed week! 🙂
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I’m sure that if your friend know you well then he asked you at a point where his project would benefit from your brutal honesty.
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I think honesty is tough to hear, but It always helps me if I listen.
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Hi Reggie
Good point!
I have to remind myself often to listen to criticism and to differing opinions with an open mind instead of becoming defensive.
Thank you and many blessings! 🙂
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I am right there with you; and it’s very hard for me to accept criticism. I believe the best criticisism comes from those I trust, and those who I know understand the subject they are criticising.
Have a great day!
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Hi Reggie
Indeed it is best to hear from people that you know love you and have your best interest at heart.
But even then it can be hard as I feel sometimes those that I love the most are the most critical ones.
I try to listen with an open mind. Try being the key word.
Blessings! 🙂
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And that’s all you can really do. Have a great day, and thanks for the conversation.
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Thank you too! 🤗🌻
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Honesty does not have to be brutal. Of course we see adjective brutal used in language sometimes as ugly and distasteful instead of just real honest honesty. Sometimes I opt out if I know it will be too negative. “It might be better if you asked someone smarter and more qualified for an opinion.”
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Hi Carl
Good point in opting out. The problem is that I volunteered for and was looking forward to have an opinion about it, but then when I realized my opinion was not going to be favorable I started second guessing myself.
I guess the truth is always best. And you do have a good point, it is just real honesty, brutal should not apply here.
Thank you always for your insight and have a blessed week! 🙂
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I am glad you thought about it And responded. He sounds like a strong person… He will have to considering that other people may be harsher and more abrupt. Some are downright rude.
That said, honesty is good.
He knows and values your opinion and expected you to tell it like is it.
My friend Robin always said, “kavita, listen to others, value their opinions but go with your instincts and gut.
😉 kavita in sunshinysa
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Hi Kavita
You and your friend Robin are wise. Honesty is always good and as friends he expected that.
Thank you so much for your insight and I wish you many blessings! 🙂
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I like the flow of your posts. That keeps me coming back to read more of your posts. Also, I can be brutally honest too sometimes and like you I also overthink it afterwards. Would have done exactly what you did in the situation!😊
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Thank you so much! I am hoping to get better and hopefully more entertaining.
I am glad I am not alone in my honesty and regret combo lol
Wishing you a blessed day! 🙂
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