Category Archives: Finding Me

Anything related to the discovery of the inner me

Change is necessary, and it is always good!

19 Tuesday Sep 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating, Fiction, Finding Me

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“It’s only after you’ve stepped outside your comfort zone that you begin to change, grow, and transform.” ― Roy T. Bennett

Happy New Week!

Every Monday feels like new start. A chance to start a new project, or follow up on old plans.

One of my plans is to write more.  Well, not write more; publish more. 

I do write often, but my writings rarely see the light of day.  The problem is, I edit and edit until a post becomes too dated.  I have written about this problem before.  I still have not managed to make a change.

The posts that I manage to publish, are the ones that I decide to forgo all the endless editing and just hit publish.  Believe me, it takes a lot effort for me to be able to do that. I feel anxious, as if I am going out in my pajamas, or if I am serving someone an unbaked cake.

When I look back at old posts, I see so many typos and grammatical errors.  I see a lot wordiness.  I see improvements to be made.  It feels unfinished and, as if I am not presenting my best self.

But, right at this moment, I rather publish a post with errors, than not to post anything at all.

I look at my Drafts folder and it is overwhelming.  As overwhelming as all the books around the house that I haven’t started yet, or worse, that I have not finished yet.

I decided to do something about all of the unfinished in my life.  I plan on reading all the books that I have started. And then, start on all the new books that I have bought from my fellow bloggers that have become published.  I am so proud of all of you! Please give me time and I will eventually get to read your books and will write a review. 

Never finishing a book, is like holding on to a gift and never opening it.  What if there is something really wonderful in there and I never get to it?

Getting back to my posts, I plan on tackling my Drafts Folder and going through each post.  I will either hit publish or delete.

I also feel I need to give this blog a direction.  This blog was started as an outlet to the pain of my broken heart and the devastation of being cheated on.   Then, it became a journal of my dating adventures, and misadventures.

What should it become now?  There are no more dating adventures, since Michael has been elected The One!

Is happiness boring?  Failed dates are more interesting to write about.  Plus, I don’t want to be bragging about how blessed Michael and I feel to have found each other. Perhaps I can make blissful life interesting.

Write about work? This commodities brokerage industry is one crazy industry, and I do have a lot of stories about it. That is an idea.

Write about travels? Well, I need to be traveling more to actually write about it.

The direction will take shape as I write more and more, I mean, as I post more and more.  I decided, boring and all, typos and all, that I will post something every day. 

Perhaps I will have a schedule and every day of the week there will be a different theme, but I am not there yet.  For now, there will be days that my post will be very short, or just a photo, or just a 1 sentence review of something read, seen, eaten, etc.

Please note, I am visiting more of your blogs, but I still cannot hit like on any post (thank you WordPress! NOT!)  And I do suspect that not all my comments are being seen or received.  I write a comment. It appears to be published, but when I go back to the post, it is no longer there.  I am considering changing blogging hosts, once I have researched my options. Suggestions welcomed!

Hang in there, as I grow and my blog changes.  Thank you for being here!

“Don’t Just

Don’t just learn, experience.
Don’t just read, absorb.
Don’t just change, transform.
Don’t just relate, advocate.
Don’t just promise, prove.
Don’t just criticize, encourage.
Don’t just think, ponder.
Don’t just take, give.
Don’t just see, feel.
Don’t just dream, do.
Don’t just hear, listen.
Don’t just talk, act.
Don’t just tell, show.
Don’t just exist, live.”
― Roy T. Bennett

Leaving Iceland and getting back to NY

28 Monday Aug 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Finding Me, travels

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Downtown Reykjavik

Downtown Reykjavik

“The traveler sees what he sees. The tourist sees what he has come to see.” ― G.K. Chesterton

The fifth day in Iceland was the day we were leaving.

The day before, Michael had driven over 10 hours.  By the time we got to the hotel he was exhausted, as expected, so we didn’t go out and went straight to bed.

He had hiccups that were persistent and kept getting in the way of his sleep. We Googled and tried some of the techniques recommended to stop hiccups. They would work for a while, but then would return.  Eventually we fell asleep.

The next morning, I wanted to have breakfast first and then leave for the airport.  Michael wanted to skip breakfast and leave right away.  Our flight was at 11:30am.  In the end, I agreed with Michael, we still had to stop at the gas station and fill up the tank.

His hiccups came back again, on and off.

We stopped at a gas station to get gas, and made it to the airport with a lot time to spare.   We checked in, and then got breakfast.  There was not a lot to choose from, so we got croissants and coffee. 

We had to take a bus to get to the plane, I haven’t had to do that in a long time.  It was an uneventful flight.  To eat, they gave us a choice of chicken sandwich or cheese platter.  I got the chicken, and Michael got the cheese.  They were both good, but he barely touched his.

We both have Global Entry, and our bags had priority tags, so it took minutes to get out of JFK airport and into an Uber.  They were handing out Covid tests, and for a moment I thought about stopping to get some, but decided that we needed to just get home.  We got home it was only 2 pm, 6pm Iceland time.

“The most poetical thing in the world is not being sick.” ― G.K. Chesterton

As I was unpacking, Michael said: “I think I should take a Covid text”. What? Seriously? Why? He answered: “because persistent hiccups can be a symptom of Covid”. He had just Googled and found that out that it can be a Covid symptom, although rare.

I got a test, and lo and behold: He was positive.  It was shocking to me.   Who knew hiccups can mean Covid?  It turns out the fatigue he was feeling was not only about the driving.

I tested negative. The next few days I woke up with a scratchy throat. Five days later we tested again. He was still positive, and I was still negative.  On day 10 we both tested negative.  I never got it, so I think my scratchy throat was just a cold.

By now he is already feeling back to himself, and back to the gym. I finally came back to the office.  Because I had been exposed, I made sure to stay away from the office. 

“One of the advantages of being disorganized is that one is always having surprising discoveries.” ― A.A. Milne

Back to the trip.  To summarize, it was a wonderful trip.  We did a lot in 4 days.  In hindsight, we would do some things differently, such as staying in hotels throughout the country, so we wouldn’t have to do too much driving in and out of Reykjavik.  I would have researched restaurants and coffee shops and already have a plan of times and places to stop to eat. 

But then again, it is fun not to have everything so planned.  It can be fun to just leave room for discovery.  Beautiful things can be found in the unexpected and unplanned.

As far as being an expensive place as everyone say, it is!  But with planning, it doesn’t have to be.  We bought our tickets and hotel just one week prior, so we probably overpaid.  There is an airline called Play Airlines that flies out of Stewart Airport, about 1 hour from me.  They sell tickets to Iceland for around $500.  Actually, I just checked and it is now $299.00.  We didn’t want to take a chance since we were going for only 4 days.  But when I retire, we will perhaps take a chance on budget airlines.

Iceland is gorgeous, clean and safe.  They even recommend hitchhiking!! I may go back at some point, but only after I crossed off some other countries off of my list first.  Well, I better start making that list then.

Iceland in 4 days: Day 4, final day sightseeing

25 Friday Aug 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Finding Me, travels

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“I can speak to my soul only when the two of us are off exploring deserts or cities or mountains or roads.” ― Paulo Coelho

Day 4. Drive to Jokulsarlon Glacier

We were going to have breakfast first, but at the last minute we decided not to wait until 7am and instead stop at some place on the way for breakfast.  To get to Jokulsarlon Glacier from Reyjavik takes approximately 5 hours.  In hindsight we should have done it in 2 days.  Michael ended up driving over 10 hours. I didn’t drive as we had not added my name to the rental agreement – originally we were getting a manual transmission car. 

The route taken is Route 1, also known as Ring Road.  It circles the entire country.  The whole trip is so worth, the landscape is beautiful!  We stopped to get coffee in the town of Vik at a gas station that had a snack shop.  It seemed like the only place around, as we didn’t want to leave Route 1.   We got coffee and muffins. I had a couple of bites of mine, but Michael didn’t touch his – that says a lot.  They were awful. We threw $15.63 in the trash.  The service wasn’t that great either.  The clerk forgot about our coffees, and we were just standing there for awhile.

Little did we know that right next door there was a coffee shop.  We saw a sign as we were driving away, we decided not to stop and just keep driving.  We had crackers and chips, and other snacks in the car.  We did stop back there on the way back. It is called lava Café and it is inside a clothing/souvenir store.  We got 2 small round pizzas -smaller than a regular slice, 1 croissant, and small Swiss mocha. Not that good, but edible. $20.22. 

Jokulsarlon Glacier Lagoon sits on the southeast edge of the Vatnajokull National Park.  The Park is huge with many hiking trails and other activities.  On this trip we decided against any hiking because my hips have been acting up.  Plus, we didn’t really have time for much.

We got to the glacier and the parking lot was full, so we parked across the street at the parking lot for Diamond Beach.  Both parking lots are very convenient. 

We wanted to do a boat tour, but there was no availability.  We didn’t want to book beforehand as we had no idea of what time we would get there, just in case we made additional stops along the way.   The Amphibian Vehicle tour is $50.00 and it last 30 minutes.  The Zodiac tour, which can get closer to the icebergs, last one hour and fifteen minutes and it costs about $105.00.

We spent about 30 minutes there, taking it all in.  There are countless icebergs floating on the lagoon, that have broken off from the glacier.  We saw some ducks and a couple of seals. I took pictures of the ducks, but the seals were camera shy.  

There are restrooms and food trucks here.  I didn’t see anything I wanted to eat, so I just had a yogurt, one of those children’s squeezable ones, Michael had coffee.  $8.35

From there we walked back to Diamond Beach.  Diamond Beach is a volcanic black sand beach.  It is named Diamond beach because of the icebergs that wash up on shore resembling sparkling diamonds.  It is not a swimmable beach due to dangerous waves and tides. It is a beautiful shoreline.

We spent about 20 minutes there and then were back on Route 1 to return to Reykjavik.  There were also 2 waterfalls I wanted to stop at.  There are many along the way, but these are the two more famous ones.

The first we stopped at was Skogafoss Waterfall.  This fall is part of the Skoga River and can be seen from the road.  It is impressive, and visitors can get really close to it.   I got as close as I could without getting myself wet.  There is also a stairway on the side that leads up to a viewing platform at the top of the waterfall.  I didn’t go up as it would have taken some time. 

We probably spent 30 minutes there, but ideally one should reserve up to 2 hours for this stop to go up the viewing platform and to hike along the Fimmvorouhals Trail.  There is not a parking fee, but they ask for donations to use the restrooms.

Another 30 minutes from there, it is the other waterfall I wanted to stop at, Seljalandsfoss.  It is just minutes from Route 1. It is part of the Seljalandsa River.  It is smaller than Skogafoss, but still impressive.  At this one, visitors can walk behind the curtain of falling water, there is a path all around the back of the falls.  I didn’t do it, but I think it would be a lot fun to do it when one is ready to get wet. 

The path behind is closed in the winter because of the icy path. There are lights illuminating it, so people can still stop by on the rare times when it is dark. 

On the road, between these two waterfalls I saw a fence covered in bras.  We passed by it fast and didn’t have a change to stop.  I looked it up, and there are a couple of different stories. The most popular is that, around 2012 several bras were stolen.  They were later found strewn on the fence.  Ever since then travelers have been adding more bras to the fence.  It is such a whimsical sight.

Before we got to Reykjavik we made stops at a couple of places looking for a coffee shop, but failed.  We eventually stopped at Kronan supermarket and got some additional chocolate to bring home as gifts.  This bill was only $15.11.  A prior chocolate trip to Bonus Supermarket was $24.27.

We also got some souvenirs such as fridge magnets, shot glasses, and keychains.  I got only 1 t-shirt for my sister.  I normally don’t buy a lot souvenirs, but always get something for friends that collect those.  I have some receipts, but I am not sure what is for what. $35.82, $14.34, $58.51, $24.66 and $21.23.

We got to the hotel exhausted. I don’t even know what we had for dinner, but my guess is cheese and crackers at the hotel, as I can’t find a receipt for anything else.  Plus Michael was exhausted, from what we thought was the driving.  More to follow.

Iceland in 4 days: Day 2

21 Monday Aug 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Finding Me

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Day 2.  Tour of Golden Circle tourist areas and the Secret Lagoon with Your Day Tours Group

We had breakfast at the hotel and proceeded to the appointed bus stop to wait for the minibus.  We were supposed to be there, ready to go at 8am.  The bus may show up between 8 and 8:30. This day it seemed our bus was the last to arrive, well after 8:30.  $114.00 per person.

While waiting for the bus we made friends with a couple from Long Island, NY.  Afterwards we kept meeting them in other places.  It was fun to keep seeing their friendly happy faces.

The bus was okay, I wish there was more space.  It felt a bit tight.  Our guide was a nice lady from the Czech Republic.  

Thingvallir National Park

1st Stop. Thingvellier National Park. This is one of the places that most symbolizes Iceland and its history. Many Icelandic major events have taken place at this site.

It sits in a rift valley, formed when two tectonic plates moved apart. It is impressive seeing the cracks and gorges throughout the park.

We were there for 45 minutes.  It went very fast.  We didn’t have a chance to see it all.

2nd Stop. Gullfoss Waterfall, Blaskogabyggo.  This is a gorgeous two step waterfall with several viewing platforms.  It is so incredible to be in front of nature when it exhibits such force.

Sigrid Tomasdottir, pictured in the plaque below, was the daughter of the owner of the land where this waterfall is.  It is been told that her father sold part of the land with the waterfall, not realizing that the the new owners wanted to use the fall and in essence destroy it.

Sigrid Tomasdottir

She then took on the part of the protector of the waterfall and embarked on a long journey to save it.  At one point, even threatening to throw herself in the fall. Fortunately, with the help of a lawyer that later became Iceland’s first president, the waterfall was saved.

There are also gift shops and cafeteria there. We were at this stop for 40 minutes and it was enough time to see it. 

Gullfoss Waterfall

3rd Stop. Woolmarket Myrkholt . This is a very small store in a farm, featuring homemade sweater, and other items from the local farms.

When we were there, we spent a few minutes with the horses housed there.  They have sheep also, but they were all scattered around the land, so we didn’t get to interact with them.  

We spent 20 minutes there and to me was fine, since I had no interest in shopping.

Geyser hot springs

4th Stop. Geysir, Haukadalu – A field with many erupting hot springs.  The most famous is Strokkur, referred as the son of Geysir.  

It is hard to time its eruption to get a picture, so one has to stand there ready to act. We were lucky we got to see several.

This location is where we stopped for lunch.  I had fish and chips and Michael had the vegetarian quiche.  We repeated that same order in various places.  I had a coke and he had a beer.  I had a chocolate cake and he had a cheesecake. They were all good.  $45.00 for the meals and drinks and $21.05 for the desserts.

This stop was 1 hour and 15 minutes. It felt like it was enough time to eat and see the geyser, but I wouldn’t have minded having more time to walk around the hot springs more.

Strokkur

5th and last stop. The The Secret Lagoon, in Fluoir.  It is the oldest geothermal pool in the island. I was very underwhelmed by it.  It is small and it felt slimy under my feet.  I would pass on this one next time. I agree with a reviewer that said: “it is neither a secret or a lagoon”. 

The stop was for one and a half hour.  I didn’t stay long in the pool, but took my time in the shower afterwards.  In this and every pool in Iceland,  they really stress upon the need to take a shower completely nude before getting into your bathing suit and going into the pool.  It is really interesting to see the dynamic in the showers.  Some are very free with their bodies, while others wanted to run and hide.

I forgot to get a picture of the Secret Lagoon, but here is the sign 🙂

I am not sure what time it was when we got bag to the hotel.  We weren’t hungry. Besides lunch, we spent the day eating snacks in the bus.  We had gotten them at the market the night before. We spent $35.82 and got chips, cheese, cookies and chocolate.

I also bought water.  Believe it or not, I was having a problem with the taste of water, and was trying to see if the bottled water would be better.  I know it is the same water and a waste of money.

Iceland has one of the best waters in the planet.  It is said one can even drink from natural sources such as streams and rivers. So clearly, the problem was me.  For some reason, it felt heavy on my tongue, and totally unpleasant to drink. That feeling/taste was still with me for a whole day after arriving home.   

Gaeta Gelato

After leaving our backpacks in the hotel, we went a few doors down to Gaeta Gelato. We both had small cups of gelato.  I had 2 flavors, passion fruit/mango and tiramisu.  Michael had a coffee with chocolate chunks.  They all were delicious.  $15.24 for both.

In the end it was a great day! The tour was great and has its pros and cons.

Then back to the hotel and get stuff ready for Day 3.

“We only know a tiny proportion about the complexity of the natural world. Wherever you look, there are still things we don’t know about and don’t understand. […] There are always new things to find out if you go looking for them.” ― David Attenborough

Iceland in 4 days: Day 1

18 Friday Aug 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Finding Me, Food, travels

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“To the complaint, ‘There are no people in these photographs,’ I respond, There are always two people: the photographer and the viewer.” ― Ansel Adams

Day 1.  Arrival and visiting the are northwest of Reykjavik.

Please forgive the misspellings of names and locations.  I tried my best to recollect all the places we have been, in the right order, and correct spelling, but I probably failed miserably.

I have included some of the prices we paid for items such as food, etc, so you have an idea if you ever decide to visit.

Our trip was last minute, so I am sure that we overpaid for flights and hotel.  We used Delta Vacations and paid $3,252.16 for the flight and hotel.  We were happy to use Delta vacations.  The flight alone was showing up as $1,600 per person.

We landed at Keflavik International airport in Reykjavik at 9am.  We got through Immigration.  Uneventful.  I noticed that I was not told “Welcome” by the agent.  I like to think that everyone is happy to see me arrive 😊.

We got our 1 checked bag and cleared customs. We then waited in line at Hertz for about 30 minutes to get our rental car.  It was a long wait, but we were so happy and excited to be away that we didn’t mind.

Michael wanted a small Suzuki, but they upgraded us to a bigger Skoda sedan.  The car rental bill was $767.36 for 4 days.  We joked that he got upgraded because he is probably the only person that buys all the extra insurance they offer. 

The gas bill was $168.25.  We drove 3 out of 4 days, for about 20 hours or more. We did a lot driving.

After finding our car in the rental parking lot, we searched for the nearest bakery.  I always need to check the local bread situation. We chose Sigurjonsbakari in Keflavik.  It seemed to be mostly frequented by locals, and I like that.  The bread was forgettable, but perhaps I ordered the wrong one.  To drink I wanted something similar to a café mocha, and the girl suggested a Swiss Mocha.  OMG! It was delicious.  Very similar to my everyday concoction made of coffees, chocolates and creams – only better!

They line the inside of the cup with chocolate fudge then they add the mocha mixture, which I assume includes chocolate and milk, then they brew espresso on top.  They then add whipped cream – which I would love to have the recipe, as this whipped cream didn’t turn into a oily mess.  Then they added chocolate shavings. Heavenly!

Since it was way too early to check into the hotel, we decided to drive northwest.  The landscape really hit us we drove for hours, stopping at different places on the side of the road to take in the enormity of the place.  It is so different to what I have seen before – Keep in mind I haven’t been to many places, such to the canyons in Grand Canyon and even the waterfalls in upstate NY.  We stopped at a waterfall in Helgafellssveit. Probably the smallest we have seen in this trip, but still beautiful and very accessible from the road.

We also stopped at Gestastofa Visitor center, where a very helpful clerk gave us a map and described the local sights.  We decided to give up going to the Snaefellness National Park, as it was another long drive and a long hike from the road.  Instead, we drove towards Stykkisholmur.  

Once there, there didn’t seem to be many choices of places to eat, so we decided to try the fish and chips truck.  $37.99 for 2 fish and fries order. I could have done without it. It was not to my taste.  The fish too greasy, and there was some weird seasoning that gave me a bad after taste.  I am not mentioning the name of the food truck, as I know I can be very picky when it comes to food. Michael ate all his food.

We walked around and contemplated taking a boat tour.  Well, Michael wanted to, but I knew it was going to take too long and we had a long drive ahead, so we just took in the sights from the lighthouse. It is really idyllic and it reminds me of the village from the show Doc Martin.

We got back on the road, now driving back south towards Reykjavik.  On the way we stopped at Borgarnes. Another beautiful town with a beautiful shoreline and the most charming coffee shop I have ever seen. It also had a killer view from the outdoor patio.

   It is called Blomasetrio – Kaffi Kyrro.  It is whimsical with various couches and very eclectic decoration.  Michael had soup with bread, and then quiche and salad.  I had only the Swiss mocha, and a couple of slices of toast that came with Michael’s soup. $46.35 for that order.

After eating and then walking along the shore, we got back in the car to drive to the Hotel Centrum in Reykjavik.  I was happy with the hotel.  It was a small room, but the location was great and the breakfast was delicious. We only had breakfast at the hotel 2 out of the 4 days as the other days we needed to get out early and the breakfast only started at 7am.

We joke now that the best food we had in Iceland was the bread at the hotel.  Please forgive us uneducated and spoiled tourists.

The hotel is both the red and beige buildings

Getting back to the day, we located the hotel, and realized that there was no parking.  It never dawned on us to ask beforehand if they had parking.  Luckily we found a spot not too far.   Parking on the street using the Parka app was a total of $37.76, mostly for Day 2 of our vacation, when we took a group tour and left the car parked.  Parking is charged from 9am to 6pm.

We checked in and went out looking for food.  Because it gets dark so late, we had no idea it was already 10:30pm.  We were turned away by most restaurants.  It turns out that on Thursdays nights they close the kitchen at 10 o’clock. Not sure about the other days.

Every restaurant we stopped at, pointed us to Tapas Barinn that have late hours.  The waitress there was happy to welcome us. To drink I had a passion fruit mojito – yes, even in Iceland I have to have passion fruit.  Michael had a beer.  We shared bread with hummus and other sauces, pan fried char with sweet potato puree, patatas bravas, broccoli and cauliflower with a pomegranate sauce.  It was okay.  I am a fan of tapas, but this didn’t really make me want to go back.  There was no tacos or empanadas.

This restaurant has great reviews, but I would have been happier with the regular fish taco and empanadas. Perhaps my palate is just too pedestrian. I realized I should try the local cuisine instead of looking for the same every day food, but Michal and I are not really adventurous when it comes to food.  The bill was $101.05.

We got to the hotel and passed out.

“For me, a landscape does not exist in its own right, since its appearance changes at every moment; but the surrounding atmosphere brings it to life – the light and the air which vary continually. For me, it is only the surrounding
atmosphere which gives subjects their true value.” ― Claude Monet

Playing house, and on the way to Iceland

09 Wednesday Aug 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating, Finding Me

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“The traveler sees what he sees. The tourist sees what he has come to see.” ― G.K. Chesterton

Hi friends,

I have a lot to write, but once again I am using the excuse of lack of time. Work is insane, no time for anything, even though my co-worker has returned from her 3-month medical leave. I am trying to get a lot done to be able to go away for 5 days.

So, this is just quick hello and an update on how things are going with Michael. We have been together now a whole six months from the time we exchanged the first email.

Michael has been living with me for a whole month now.  It has been so easy.  No stress, no problems.  I imagined there would be some growing together pains, but there is none.  There is only bliss.  So much laughter is heard around in my home.

I think we are really being very open and receptive of each other.  I am learning how to go to bed early and he is learning to indulge a little more when it comes to food.  That is just the beginning… We plan on learning from each other and with each other, and becoming the best versions of ourselves.

Tomorrow night Michael and I are leaving to Iceland.  It will be a quick getaway.  I plan on not checking emails and not think about work at all.  It is only 5 days but I think this quick time away will do me wonders.

I am looking forward to traveling to some place neither of us has been to before.  It is our plan to see the world, so that in a few years we can decide where to retire.

I hope to take pictures and post them here along with some notes about my trip. I know I have made such promises before.

Got to run now… bags to pack.

Thank you for following along my dating journey, and for always providing me support and the kindest of words! You make my life better!

Blessings to all!

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” ― Marcel Proust

M survived 3 weeks with my family in Brazil!

22 Thursday Jun 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating, Finding Me

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“No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had one.” ― Elbert Hubbard

I arrived from Brazil on Saturday.  M went straight to Florida.  We were together 24/7, and just got along beautifully.  We miss each other.  He will be coming to NY on July 4th.  I am swamped at work, specially at the end of the month.  My assistant is still out.  So he is giving me space to catch up with work.

He is the one! Yes, I am announcing it to whoever care to listen! I am being extremely bold when I say this is forever.  It feels like forever.  I am going to enjoy this “forever” for as long as it lasts.

My family, like the majority of Brazilians, are very welcoming.  Everyone embraced him right away.  It helps that he is an extremely loveable creature.  He is kind and unassuming, always trying to help others.  I love his generous heart!  My family truly loved him and welcomed him as part of the family.

I had warned him that this would be a work trip.  At times he hinted at wanting to go surfing, etc, but there was no way I could make that work this time.  The beach he wants to go to is very far from my town.  He is now floating the idea of renting a house there for a month this summer.  At this point, I feel I am tied to NY, at least for the next few months.  But I am remaining open minded.

As I mentioned prior, while in Brazil, we painted, cleaned, shopped, did Pilates, spent time with friends and ate.  I ate like the world was coming to an end.  Unfortunately, I have several extra pounds to show for it.

M is vegetarian and stays away from sugar and carbs.  That is, until he met me.  He is not fanatical about his diet, so in Brazil, to be polite, he indulged.  He probably ate more sugar and carbs in 3 weeks than he did his whole life prior.

I normally don’t overindulge in Brazil, but with the excuse of having him try different treats, I did. I figure that in future trips we will tone it down.  There were 3 meals that we did as a family.  Breakfast, lunch and afternoon coffee.  Dinner was just a snack, unless we were meeting friends out.  Those times around the table with my family and friends (there are always a friend or two stopping by) are precious.

We had dinner out with friends 4 times.  We had so much yummy food.  I will be posting about them in following posts. The food in Brazil is unbelievable! Well, I am biased.

We also managed to take a couple of day trips to the town where my sister used to reside and still has an apartment – Poços de Caldas, in the state of Minas Gerais.  We took the cable car to Cristo Redentor (Christ, The Redeemer).  Every town in Brazil has the statue of Christ.  The most famous one is in Rio de Janeiro. 

Unfortunately, the day that we were visiting it, it was a foggy day. They are renovating the area, and there are ziplines, bars and other attractions, but on this foggy day nothing could be seen.

We also took a couple of day trips to the countryside, including to the Pico do Gaviāo (Hawk’s Peak)– It is a mountainous area famous for paragliding.  Gorgeous!

I will write more about our trip to Brazil as time permits.  In the end, M loved Brazil and Brazil loved M.  If anything, this trip made us see that we do belong together. 😊

“Pursue what catches your heart, not what catches your eyes.” ― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

Alive in Brazil

12 Monday Jun 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating, Finding Me

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Dia dos Namorados

“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.” ― Albert Camus

Hi Friends,

This is just to say I am alive 😊

I haven’t had a chance to go check your blogs and see what you all have been up to. For that I am sorry, and I hope everyone has been well.  I will be back to the US next week and hope to have more time to get back to my cherished friends here.

Life in Brazil has been incredibly busy.  Not only I had tons of things that I wanted to get done around the house, but I am also working remotely – my functions plus some of my co-worker that remains out being treated for breast cancer.

Here is a summary of what I have been up to since I arrived here on May 26:

  • I bought a car for my brother. Dealing with the dealership, insurance, Detran (Brazilian DMV), details about paying, etc, it all involved several days.
  • Painted my mom’s second kitchen and eat-in area. Some workers that worked on some water damage made a complete mess of the walls and floor. Not to mention the fact that they didn’t cover anything.  In April, when I saw that mess, I mentioned that I was going to clean it and paint it, when I returned – many doubted, but I did.  I am very proud of that.
  • I painted my brother’s room as well. This room is adjacent to that kitchen and it needed some refreshing. It was also a chance to re-organize and clean it.
  • Organized my brother’s room. My brother is not an organized person, so every time I come to Brazil, I make improvements.
  • Put contact paper on all the kitchen cabinets. Detailed job. I had a friend that is unemployed at the moment come and help.  She has been priceless in helping me with the cleaning and organizing.
  • I cleaned a small little house I have for rent. Again, I had my friend help. Actually, she did most of cleaning. I also had to have the yard, cleared of overgrown grass and trees. I contracted that work for a small fortune – everyone here things I overpaid.
  • M and I go to Pilates every week day from 1 to 2pm. Even though he works out hard at the gym every day while in the States, he is finding out that Pilates can be challenging.  The instructor has been targeting some dormant muscles. I should be in Pilates right now, but I am catching up on work, and I am stealing a few minutes to do this Update.
  • Speaking of M, he is fitting right in. He has been helping me with everything. From cleaning, painting, decisions about the car, to doing the dishes and cleaning. He is a keeper. Everyone here adores him, even though there is still the language barrier.  He has been working hard at trying to learn Portuguese.
  • There is always a stream of visitors at my house. Friends, old and new, that come to have coffee with my parents. Most come every week, other now come more often because I am here. That has always been the routine with my family. We never go to people’s house, they come to us.  Which, now that I think of, is the opposite for me in the US.  I hardly have anyone over; I often go to people’s house.
  • Today is “Dia dos Namorados” in Brazil, somewhat similar to Valentine’s Day in the US, but not that similar. This holiday is all about boyfriends and girlfriends.  went out and got me that beautiful sunflower.  Here in my town is hard to find cut flowers, we find mostly the actual plant to be replanted.  He also bought all kinds of chocolates for the rest of the family. 
  • I was able to have a couple of outings with friends, twice for dinner and twice for a day trip to the country.  I hope to share pictures and stories when I return.

I am feeling so exhausted mentally and physically – there has been many frustrating and angering moments. But I am also so so blessed to be able to be here with my parents, to be able to better their lives in little ways, and to have M. next to me. I believe he is the person I have been waiting for.

Wishing everyone many blessings, small and large. I hope you have many reasons to smile, but even if you don’t, smile anyway.  The reasons will come!

ps. sorry for typos and errors, no time to edit.

“…feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that we’re holding back. They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we’d rather collapse and back away. They’re like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where we’re stuck. This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it’s with us wherever we are.” ― Pema Chödrön

A cow in love… with blue flowers

19 Wednesday Apr 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me, Mosaic and other crafts

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“Open the bloom of your heart and become a gift of beauty to the world.”  ― Bryant McGill, Simple Reminders: Inspiration for Living Your Best Life

Life progresses likes waves in the ocean, with highs and lows. As the spring flowers blossom, so does M and I.  We continue flying high, so excited to have found each other and so eager for a future together.  

Unfortunately, at work now is a low point.  My co-worker will be having another surgery on Monday, to deal with cancer.  Fortunately, she thinks that it will be an easier operation this time. Is there anything easy about cancer?  I am bracing myself for another 3 months without her.

As she is leaving to have surgery, I am leaving for Brazil.  I am still trying to figure out how to do her job while in Brazil, without driving myself insane.  This time I am unwilling to take it all upon myself.  I have done that for over 20 years at this job.  Everything has always been seemingless and perfect no matter what the circumstances were.  I am not willing to do it anymore. Some people here will have to step up.

In the meantime, the mosaic studio continues to be my happy place.  There, I often do more talking than creating.   The ladies there look forward to hearing about the latest news about M.  They are so happy for me, as you all are.

This cow is the latest piece I finished.  It is a cow that is in love and sees flowers all around.  She was going to have legs, but it seemed too complicated so I just put her behind some bushes. 

              

“Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?”, here’s an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!” ― Frank Kaiser

Love is in the Air – Easter Weekend Update

13 Thursday Apr 2023

Posted by in Daily Life, Dating, Finding Me

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 I cannot pretend I am without fear. But my predominant feeling is one of gratitude. I have loved and been loved; I have been given much and I have given something in return; I have read and traveled and thought and written. I have had an intercourse with the world, the special intercourse of writers and readers.

Above all, I have been a sentient being, a thinking animal, on this beautiful planet, and that in itself has been an enormous privilege and adventure.”
― Oliver Sacks, Gratitude

As usual, I am short on time, but I wanted to give everyone an update.  Things with M are going marvelously well!  Love is blooming to coincide with spring. Sometimes I am afraid to talk about it and jinx it.  He adores everything about me.  I keep finding reasons to adore him.

I believe in fairy-tales, and he is becoming my version of fairy-tale.  I plan on enjoying every second for as long as it lasts.  With him I feel natural and beautiful, I don’t care about the stubborn several pounds that I keep losing and getting it back.  I still cannot find a single thing about him that gives me pause.  Nothing.

It doesn’t even matter to me that he lives in Florida.  A state that I said I would never live at.  He gave me the house keys, and says it is my home now.  He said that any time I need, I can just call and he will catch the next flight to NY.

We started communication on Match.com on February 8.  On February 23 we met in person when he flew to NY.  We barely know each other and yet it feels so right.

At times I remind myself that I have been searching for someone for over 10 years, so it may seem fast, and yet it is not. I am grateful, but also aware that it was about time lol

I have already been to Florida twice, and he has come to NY twice.   And we spent time in Park City, UT.

The last meeting was when he came to spend Easter.  He arrived last Thursday afternoon and stayed until Tuesday.  Yesterday, Wednesday, he visited some relatives in NJ and flew back home.

This time he stayed in my apartment.  It was just so easy having him there.  On the day that I had to work, he stayed out of the way watching his financial channels and doing research on some things for me.  When I went to the mosaic studio on Saturday morning, he walked around my neighborhood with my sister.

“That I may be able to say of love (that I had) 

Be not immortal, since it is a flame,

 But be infinite while it lasts” – Vinicius de Moraes

 On the other days he fixed some stuff around my apartment, we went to Kohls, and a couple of other stores, and we also went out to eat a bunch of times.  The most memorable restaurants were:

  • Harvest on Hudson in Hastings, NY. The location is just gorgeous.  The food was not as amazing as it normally is, but still was very good.  We had cod fritters, eggplant meatballs, cod fish with mashed potatoes and cauliflower, and a pasta and asparagus dish.  For dessert we had tiramisu and chocolate tart.  To drink we had the Brazilian Caipirinha (sugar cane alcohol, lime and passionfruit).
  • Telly Taverna in Port Chester.  Beautiful place, great waiters, and amazing food.  We had so many different foods, so is hard to remember, but among the dishes were:  For appetizers: Mixed fried vegetables, zucchini croquettes, fried potatoes, pita bread with hummus and yogurt dip, spanakopita (the best ever!).  For entrees we had: the flounder, the cod, and the salmon.  For dessert they gave us what looked like donut holes with cinnamon and honey.  We went a little nuts with the ordering and took some food home. To drink we all had a different cocktail and all 3 were delicious.  They were: Drunken Telly’s (Passion fruit, citrus, Metaxa and malibu), Paros (Aperol, St Germain, prosecco, Greek honey) and he third one I don’t remember the name, but it had cucumbers in, and it was my least favorite.
  • Alvin and Friends in New Rochelle. We were going to another restaurant, but it was closed for Easter, so we just walked into Alvins.  Always great, but some of the items were not as usual, and a bit pricy as it was $65 per person for the food, as it was an Easter pre-fix menu.  We had cod fritters and empanadas for appetizers.  Entrees were: Fried chicken with macaroni and cheese.  I had coconut rice with ribs, and M had salmon with macaroni and cheese.  For desserts we took home chocolate cake and fruit tarts.  To drink we each had a different cocktail and they were all awesome. They were: rum punch, peach martini and a prosecco raspberry.  The owner visits every table, every time, and that always feels like the nicest thing to do.

Breakfasts, and one meal I cooked at home.  He later commented to my sister that he keeps finding amazing things about me, such as the fact that I can cook.  All I did was makes eggs in the morning, and for dinner, heat up left overs and make some salmon, which I overcooked.  For some reason he is so easily impressed by me. (yes, I giggled writing that)

I will be taking 2 trips to Brazil.  The first one, in about one week, will be very short, just to get my mom and bring her to NY for her 88th birthday.  I will be returning to Brazil in May to take my mom back. I will stay there about 3 weeks.  At that time, M will come to stay some time and meet the rest of the family.  We haven’t discussed the itinerary yet, but we are both excited about it.

He has been learning Portuguese since meeting me.  I so appreciate his efforts in being ready to communicate with my family. He even offered to stay with my parents in Brazil if I needed a break.  He is one of a kind! And he is now mine! 😉

“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect—you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break—her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.” ― Bob Marley