“The power of getting to know one another is so immense, eclipsed only by first getting to know ourselves.” ― Bryant McGill, Voice of Reason

M invited me to watch the Super Bowl with him. We were both counting the minutes until the weekend. I was not at all apprehensive or nervous about being in his house alone with him.  I knew I would be safe.

He picked me up on Saturday evening around 7 pm. He came up to my apartment and met my sister.  I gave him a quick tour of my apartment and we left.

We picked up Mexican food on the way to his house.  He lives over 1 hour away from me.  His house is at the end of a dead end street and a couple of blocks from the lake.

I loved his house inside and out. It was so clean, organized and beautifully decorated.  Nothing out of place.

I can’t remember if I had a tour of the house before or after dinner, but after both we settled on the couch drinking wine.  The fireplace, candles, music, wine, he thought of every detail and I love that.

At this point I will let you imagine how the rest of the night went.  While I didn’t feel  the earth move the words that come to mind are: beautiful, romantic, loving, gentle, intimate, special.

My longing for you keeps me in this moment My passion gives me courage. – Rumi

Unfortunately after falling asleep I had an awful night.  I had had a massage in the afternoon and I think the lady was just a bit too forceful with my upper back and shoulders.  They ached so badly.  I didn’t want to wake him up so I opened his bathroom cabinets looking for pain medicine but couldn’t find any.  Later I found out that he keeps that stuff in a cabinet in the kitchen.

When he got up I was in the kitchen having toast with butter.  He made coffee and later eggs and then we watched the blue jays. He places peanuts on the patio every morning and the blue jays come and gets them.  It was very cool watching them!

After the lazy morning, he wanted to show me the town – Greenwood Lake.  It is a very small town by a lake, as the name says.  We stopped by a local coffee place and I had a scone and coffee.  He just had coffee.

Then we went to a beef jerky place – I need to go back, the jerky there was delicious.  He was eager to take me to the candy store because he knows I love chocolate.  I chose a few chocolate and coconut ones and they were delicious.

We then went to his friend’s house to watch some of the Superbowl.  He didn’t want to stay for the whole game because he wanted to have dinner at home.  He was proud of the meatballs he makes, so he made them the day before.  We had angel hair pasta (he knew angel hair is my favorite) with meatballs and garlic bread.

But before we get back to dinner let me talk about his friends.  There were about a dozen people at the house.  Some of the males were also cops.   Everyone was welcoming and friendly.  We walked in and I was introduced to the hosts.  As I was talking to the lady of the house he went to talk to another friend.  I walked around on my own talking to the other people.  He later apologized for leaving me alone and was pleasantly surprised that I had no problem with mingling on my own.  I never felt that he left me alone, but it was thoughtful of him to apologize.

When I had a chance to talk to his best friend alone he told me what a great guy M is.  He said: “He will never cheat on you or hurt you”.  He said his only flaw is that he is too quiet and laid back.  He continued: “You will have to suggest stuff to do.  Perhaps mention the restaurants you want to go to, and things you want to do.”  I said: ” I can do that”.

“To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.” – Bertrand Russell

And I think I can.  I would normally say I want a guy that plans stuff, but I think I can learn to compromise on that for the right person.

We stayed until half-time and then drove home.  We got home and he prepared the meatball dinner while  we watched the game.  We had dinner by candlelight.  It was delicious and romantic.

After dinner we tried to watch a movie but I was falling sleep so we just went to sleep. I had a better night, no pain.

Monday was a lazy day.  We had a late breakfast and watched the birds.  All was great until I brought up politics.  It seemed to me that everyone in his circle are pro-Trump so I wanted to make sure he knew I was not.  I told him if that was important to him I was not the person for him.  That got him talking about all that he sees in his job and the reasons why we have different opinions.

It was a mistake bringing up politics again.  We had already talked about it.  We both knew each other’s view on the subject.  We survived the talk, but I just wished that I had not brought it up and wasted time with that.

“At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet”- Plato

He drove me home early afternoon as I had stuff to get done that afternoon.

Things I enjoyed about the weekend:

  • He thought about every detail – he even had new loofah, toothbrush, toothpaste, etc waiting for me.  He even got new sheets for the bed.
  • He didn’t let me pay for anything.  I tried paying for coffee and even that he insisted on paying.
  • He didn’t impose his dietary choices on me.  Even though he stays away from sugar and carbs he went out of his way to buy me chocolate, make me pasta and garlic bread.
  • He made me feel safe and comfortable.  There was nothing awkward.  I didn’t feel pressured to do anything I didn’t want to do.
  • His friends made me feel comfortable and welcome in their home.  He later told me that I was a hit with his friends.

What I didn’t enjoy:

  • Painful first night.  I will make sure to have softer massages in the future.
  • Talking about politics.  It was not necessary.  I didn’t have to bring it up.

Something that was surprising:  In the 3 years that I lived with the ex-boyfriend in his house,  while I loved him and thought my life fairy-tale,  looking back I really never felt comfortable in his house.  I remember laying in bed and thinking: I don’t belong here.  At times I would think: Can I do this?  Can I live here?   When I left, besides missing him, the only other thing I missed was the dog.  I didn’t miss the big house, the pool, the tennis court.  In M’s house I felt at home and at peace.

I like My Body When It Is With Your – e.e.cummings

“i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body.  i like what it does,
i like its hows.  i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones,and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the,shocking fuzz
of your electric furr,and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,

and possibly i like the thrill

of under me you so quite new”