Tags
breaking up a potential relationship, daily texts and phone calls, feeling pressured and overwhelmed, letting things flow as they may, taking it easy, too much too soon
“Like some wines our love could neither mature nor travel.”
― The Comedians
After 3 dates I had to cancel the 4th because of Covid. He wanted to meet up last week, but I was still not 100% and decided to wait. Then the following day he said he didn’t wake up feeling well. He hasn’t been well ever since. Yesterday, 7 days later, he finally took a home test and it was positive.
I don’t know when I will see him next. The sad part is that I don’t care. In the beginning of this potential relationship, I should be looking forward to seeing him, to talking on the phone, etc; and I am not.
I feel overwhelmed by his attention, by the daily texting and wanting to talk on the phone. He is kind, considerate, smart, such a great person. But it all feels a bit too much to me. I feel drained at times.
“I felt as if each person within visual range were slowly draining the life from me. We were all connected, and the more them there were, the more I wanted to crawl under a table and cry.” ― We Are the Ants
He doesn’t know me yet. It feels like his excitement is not really about me, but the idea of me, the idea of a relationship. If it really is about me, then he is definitely more into me, than I am into him.
From the beginning I didn’t feel a lot chemistry, but I sensed potential. I figured we would go on a few more dates and let things flow. Instead, it feels I must make a decision now, otherwise I may be leading him on.
I didn’t want to have this conversation over the phone or on text, but I don’t feel I can wait anymore. I have mentioned to him before, how I feel pressured if it is too much too soon, but I don’t think he really understood.
It feels like a breakup, but when is a break up a break up? We had 3 dates. I feel he tried to speed things up, and covid put a wrench on things, but I don’t feel we were a relationship yet.
I think this is the case that if we were right for each other I would just welcome the attention and not feel pressured. With the right person everything feels right.
“I’ll tell you something, Harpy,” he said, his voice almost a whisper now. “It never even occurred to me that we wouldn’t make it. And it never occurred to you that we would. You were just waiting for us to go down in flames. I thought we could get through anything.” ― My One and Only
charliecountryboy said:
Hmmm, obviously I don’t know you so well. But personally I’d have to feel excited, giddy at seeing someone. But I’m told I’m mad so, there y’go 😂
Maybe he’s a romantic and is pushing because he desperately wants a relationship? Wants to be with someone, who knows? 🤷🏻
I guess you need to do what you feel is right for you. How would you feel if you never saw him again? There’s a lot of frogs out there, you need strong lips 😉
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Charlie,
Indeed, I normally look forward to seeing someone I am interested in again. Because I am not it says a lot about how I am feeling.
I am also a romantic, and look for someone romantic. In this case it doesn’t feel right. It feels needy.
I have lips of steel to kiss the frongs, and yet pillowy soft for the right prince!
Thank you and blessings to you! ❤️
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charliecountryboy said:
Being a romantic can be a blessing and curse lol.
Yes there is a vast difference between needy and romantic but some people actually confuse the two. I have a lot of girlfriends (I mean platonic lol) that have made so many bad choices. It sounds like your making the right one here. They say there is someone for everyone, I guess sometimes you have to search for longer 🤷🏻
Have a great weekend 😊
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Good point!
I don’t mind to search until it feels right in my heart 🙂
Thank you Charlie! ♥♥
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The V Pub said:
Sorry to hear. Apparently, he he had no Godiva’s and no bobble head.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Indeed! I wonder where can I find someone with that unique combination of attributes?
Wishing you and Coda a blessed weekend! ❤
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The V Pub said:
You know, those attributes seem so familiar! 😉 ❤
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A Star on the Forehead said:
on a second thought, it does indeed! oh , and let’s not forget: must love dogs!! 😉
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The V Pub said:
And NO cats. 😉
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A Star on the Forehead said:
oh heavens, no!
and let’s not forget, No snakes either.
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kegarland said:
It sounds like he was already in a relationship, so for him this is probably a breakup lol for you, sounds like you just made a decision based on all of the flags 😉
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Good point KE! It does feel he is in a relationship and I am definitely not!
Thank you and blessings!❤
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Cassa Bassa said:
When we don’t feel right about something at the time, it ain’t right. We know it in the gut. Time is always on our side for seeing things through and seeing the truth. Love never in a hurry.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Cassa,
You are saying exactly what I believe in,. But ometimes I feel the other person is so nice, I keep trying to make it work.
It it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work!
Thank you for the wisdom and blessings!!❤
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Cassa Bassa said:
💚
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Dave said:
It seems unusual but it probably isn’t: one party invested in the relationship more than the other. Or maybe it’s better described as taking it at different paces. Maybe he’s moving too fast and you’ll never catch up, which somehow generates your lack of interest. Regardless of the reason, good on you for recognizing early on it’s best to let it go. There’s a better “pace” waiting for you out there.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Dave,
Very good point! I think no matter how fast or slow he goes I will never catch up to his level of interest and excitement.
On to new paces 🙂
Thank you and blessings! ❤
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cattalespress said:
Self-awareness is key! 🤍
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Cindy Georgakas said:
If he’s reading this .. maybe he’ll get the point. If he isn’t maybe you should send it to hm but maybe wait till he’s negative too. Don’t think a negative and a positive is a match tho.
Glad you’re on the mend Ana Star! 💖
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Thank you Cindy!
I have been trying to let him know, but he is not getting it 😦
We shall what next…
Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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DutchIl said:
Thank you for sharing!!.. it appears your heart (and other forces) has stepped in and is saying “no”, best listen to your heart.. “You don’t love the person you can live with, you love the person you cannot live without” (Author Unknown)… 🙂
Glad you are feeling better and until we meet again..
May the sun shine all day long
Everything go right, nothing go wrong
May those you love bring love back to you
May all the wishes you wish come true
May peace be within you
May your heart be strong
May you find whatever you’re seeking
Wherever you may roam
(Irish Saying)
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Larry
Indeed I am choosing to follow my heart.
I love this: “You don’t love the person you can live with, you love the person you cannot live without” – thank you for the reminder and for making things clearer.
Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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utesmile said:
Follow your instincts!
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Thank you Ute,
Perfect advice!
Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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lillyevechristie said:
Just not meant to be my darling, glad you aren’t too upset xxxx
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Lilly,
Thank you! I am not upset at all. If it doesn’t feel right, doesn’t feel right. Next! lol
Wishing you a blessed weekend! ♥♥
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