Daily Archives: April 7, 2021

Rolling the Dice

07 Wednesday Apr 2021

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“Is this thing safe?”
“Safe as life,” Gansey replied.”
― Maggie Stiefvater, The Raven Boys

Yesterday I got the Johnson and Johnson vaccine. So far, zero side effects.

I didn’t want to take it, but at this point I feel I have to.  I want to resume life.  Not that I am not resuming life already.  

But I felt I needed to take the vaccine to be able to travel.  I need to go to Brazil and see my parents.   Brazil is a complete mess.  I am so sad and scared for everyone there.

I have been bombarded with opinions from all sides.  Some said take it, some say don’t.  Once I decided to take it, then, the question was which of the 3 available vaccines to take.  Which is more effective, which has the least side effects, etc

One can go insane if he/she starts listening to people’s opinion.  I read some publications that were sent to me, I pondered for weeks.  In the end I am followed my heart and gut on what I thought I needed to do.

I told a close friend that was trying to talk me out of it: “I am rolling the dice”.  He said: “I honor that”.

So, whatever you choose to do or not do, I honor that! 

“If we stay where we are, where we’re stuck, where we’re comfortable and safe, we die there. We become like mushrooms, living in the dark, with poop up to our chins. If you want to know only what you already know, you’re dying. You’re saying: Leave me alone; I don’t mind this little rathole. It’s warm and dry. Really, it’s fine.

When nothing new can get in, that’s death. When oxygen can’t find a way in, you die. But new is scary, and new can be disappointing, and confusing – we had this all figured out, and now we don’t.

New is life.”
― Anne Lamott, Help Thanks Wow

 

Feeling blessed: Pat found me, P. is getting better and A. celebrated me

07 Wednesday Apr 2021

Posted by in Daily Life, Daily Message, Dating, EX Files

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“Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.” -― Lao-Tzu

P.’s sister hasn’t contacted me again, as she said she would.  In the meantime, his best friend Pat, contacted me on OKCupid a few days ago.  He wanted to let me know that P. had not ghosted me.

I was very surprised.  It was nice of him to do that.  I gave him my phone number and asked him to let me know if he receives any updates. 

Since I hadn’t heard from the sister, I texted Pat yesterday morning.  He got back to me at the end of the day and he let me know that P. is off of the respirator and out of the ICU. 

I am relieved and happy that he is getting better.  I know I will be speaking to him at some point, but I know he now needs to focus on getting better.  

In the meantime I do sent him texts and messages just sending prayers.

***

Last Friday I was treated to a late birthday dinner by my friend A.  He said he would pick the restaurant.  I was surprised since I am the one that often chooses where we go when we get together.

He picked Lusardi’s, a Mediterranean restaurant in Larchmont, NY.  He said he remembered I mentioned I never went there before.  I was touched that he remembered something I had mentioned in passing a long time ago.

He had red wine and I had a delicious hibiscus martini. We shared a couple of tuna appetizers and salad.  He had a gluten free pasta with vegetables and I had grilled char with cherry tomatoes and artichokes.  We shared a chocolate fudge cake. 

We had an awesome time.  It was a cold evening and we sat next to the fireplace.  We talk about all things spiritual, love, finances, health, anything and everything.  We always have the most amazing time together. 

“The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson