“The seeker embarks on a journey to find what he wants and discovers, along the way, what he needs.” – Wally Lamb
I am sure some of you are curious to know what happened last night.
Yesterday’s date was very different from most of my previous blind dates. I decided that we should meet at the Library and I would give him a tour of downtown New Rochelle and then just go to some bar.
I got to the park and didn’t immediately see him so I texted (he had emailed me his number a couple of hours before) as I searched for a face that would resemble the pictures I had seen. Eventually I just called him and told him where I was.
All of a sudden I saw him appear far away. I was nervous, excited, all at once. He reached me and we both had huge smiles. Probably relief that we both looked like our pictures. I can’t remember if we said anything, perhaps just hi and we hugged each other. It was not a quick hug. It was a hug like when you hug a loved one that you haven’t seen in ages. We stood like for awhile.
“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit” -e.e. cummings
Then we sat on a bench and made small talk. He mentioned needing to pay for parking. I am not sure why he hadn’t paid before. We walked to the car and since I have the Parking App on my phone I said I would pay.
After paying he just pulled me to him and there was more hugging. He said he was a hugger – no complaints from me. Eventually we held hands and went in search of a place to have a drink. The first place we passed by we didn’t like, then we came by a bar that I was always curious about it.
We got in and it was totally empty. It was darkly lit, cute, small, with some couches and some tall tables. We sat at the bar. An older woman appeared and greeted us. She was pleasant, had blonde hair and bright make up on. He wanted draft beer and they didn’t carry any. She suggested a drink that she makes called Rumba Juice. Mine was lemon flavored, his was pineapple. The drink was tasty and refreshing.
We sat facing each other, taking turns talking about our lives and flirting non-stop. We didn’t’ talk too much. I can’t quite remember all we talked about it. We talked about his prior relationships and the last one that ended not too long ago.
I didn’t talk as much as I normally do. Silence with him was okay. It didn’t feel awkward, it felt natural. I didn’t feel the need, the compulsion, to pepper silence with words.
“Love is the voice under all silences, the hope which has no opposite in fear; the strength so strong mere force is feebleness: the truth more first than sun, more last than star…” – E.E Cummings
It sounds really corny and cheesy but we were so into each other it was just crazy. There were pauses in the conversation where we just stared into each other eyes. I don’t think there was a single second where we weren’t either holding hands or touching each other’s arms, knees or something like that.
There was more hugs throughout. At one point he gave me a peck on the lips, and joked: This is it, that is the whole extend of my kissing abilities. I had told him that knowing how to kiss was a deal breaker for me. I laughed. I appreciate his humor.
Later on there was another kiss, a little more than a peck but nothing that would make anyone brush. It was good! Score!
I don’t remember all that was said but I remember exactly how he made me feel. I felt wanted, appreciated, understood, safe and most important, any time he hugged me, I felt I was home. I felt that in his arms was where I belonged.
We liked each other and that was that and it was that simple.
The woman returned a couple of times and on an occasion she asked to take our picture. I wish I had asked her to forward me that. We looked good as a couple. She is the owner and she has a couple of screens where she displays the photos of her customers. She has been in business 17 year. The Salon has her name, Silky.
I told her it was our first date and she was a bit surprised, mentioning that our body language told otherwise. She asked our signs. I am an Aries and he is Gemini. She warned him that Aries likes perfection, so that he better be ready to bring his best to the table. She also said that Aries are never broke, even if they say they are they are lying. All true. She said that Gemini can fulfill Aries demands. She said more but I can’t remember. I will take her words as a seal of approval.
“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Seuss
After the drink, and by then it was already after 10:30 and he had to drive 1 hour to get home, we left hand in hand.
We walked around a little bit and then we stopped by the back entrance of my building. We stayed there for awhile just hugging. And kissing. A lot. And it was amazing!
He texted me when he got home after getting lost for while. We were both giddy. We still are.
Today he is driving to another state to see his mother and then on to do a job. We will see each other in 11 or 12 days. The texting and emailing will keep us connected.
I am choosing to ignore what a lot people may see as red flags. It feels right, it makes me feel good. I waited for it, I kissed frogs, I deserve it. I am choosing to dwell in this sea of possibilities.
“…and when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself, whether he be a lover of youth or a lover of another sort, the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy and one will not be out of the other’s sight, as I may say, even for a moment…” – Plato