Tags
Date update, make believe or real life, online dating, relationship pitfalls, shot in a robbery, war stories
“Our hearts are not stones. A stone may disintegrate in time and lose its outward form. But hearts never disintegrate. They have no outward form, and whether good or evil, we can always communicate them to one another.” ―
and then there were none…
Date update: The Renter is history. After saying he would never go silent again, he did. I let it go. I know that if I said hello he would start chatting again, but what is the point? He is clearly not interested and by now neither am I.
The Swiss is also making it clear that he is not interested. He will respond if I reach out but he is never the one to make contact anymore. I lost interest in even trying to cultivate a friendship.
“A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other.” ―
That brings me to The Enigma. After showering me with poems, songs, and tons of promises of an amazing fairytale, I noticed some distance in the communication. I reached out a couple of times, but then decided to let it go and see what would happen.
After 2 days of silence I got the below text. After some reflection I replied 1 hour later.
“I am larger, better than I thought; I did not know I held so much goodness.
All seems beautiful to me.
Whoever denies me, it shall not trouble me;
Whoever accepts me, he or she shall be blessed, and shall bless me.”
―
What am I supposed to respond? Of course I wanted details. I also wanted to help him. But at this point it seems the Universe if giving me an out so I better take it and don’t question it.
I guess by now, after years of online dating, nothing should surprise me anymore, but people always do. His text was baffling. I knew he was dealing with a painful leg injury. He was shot in an attempted robbery last year. But apparently there is much more than that. What happened to all the promises of a beautiful relationship?
Some of what he had told me was hard for me to belief because it was so foreign to my simple 9 to 5 work life. It seemed the stuff that war and spy movies are made of. At one point I mentioned to him that his stories seemed fake, and if they were true that I didn’t know if I could handle it. Every time we spoke I bombarded him with questions. I wanted to understand what was in store if we embarked in a future together. Perhaps he got tired of the interrogation even though he said he was an open book and seemed to welcome all my questions.
“You know there’s no such thing as a complete lie. There’s always some truth in there.” ―
He said that he had been in some war conflicts, even getting shot and saving someone’s life by carrying them to safety. He mentioned being part of a Ranger Regiment. He said that he was currently involved in strategy with a mercenary company in Russia. He is partners in dozens of businesses in the US and a couple overseas. There was a lot he mentioned but I rather keep things somewhat vague here, so I am leaving off the actual names of the companies and certain specific details.
He had also been a teacher, ran free medical clinics, volunteered at pet shelters, paid for college for a few students, paid for prison commissary for others, among other various things. He seemed to have lived so many lives. It was hard not be in awe.
He never seemed annoyed and always seemed willing to try to explain his world to me. He wanted to assure me that I had no reason to fear him. He sent me links to news writings and YouTube videos about the military companies in Russia he was currently involved in and the Ranger Regiments he had been in.
Some of the information he sent me did demystify some aspects of it while others made me even more concerned.
“Much unhappiness has come into the world because of bewilderment and things left unsaid.” ―
He said he was planning to go back to school next year and complete another degree. He said he wanted to leave the past behind and that made me happy.
I still think that he was a nice person with a good heart. I never met anyone so caring and that acted so gentlemanly towards me. I will miss the smart conversations and the infinite possibilities that being with him held. I never met anyone so knowledgeable about everything, specially history, art and literature.
I spent some time trying to understand the meaning of his text but some things I will never understand, He could have called me. I would not have talked him out of anything. We talked about being friends no matter what. It is disappointing that it ends with a text. I guess he will forever be The Enigma. I will never know if the things that he has told me were true or perhaps just an exaggeration.
I owe him and the Universe a huge thanks for making the situation clear cut for me. I no longer have to decide if I can or cannot handle his past and whatever issues he has. I chose kindness with my reply and I believe in my heart that he chose kindness with his text.
I will miss feeling like a muse and princess. And the search for my prince continues…
“I am constantly trying to communicate something incommunicable, to explain something inexplicable, to tell about something I only feel in my bones and which can only be experienced in those bones. Basically it is nothing other than this fear we have so often talked about, but fear spread to everything, fear of the greatest as of the smallest, fear, paralyzing fear of pronouncing a word, although this fear may not only be fear but also a longing for something greater than all that is fearful.” ―
cattalespress said:
What an interesting adventure! Glad you are buckled up for the ride. You never know what wonders await just around the next bend in the road. Traveling with you in spirit!
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Thank you for coming along Stacy!
Life is indeed full of adventures. I remain open and ready for them.
Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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Cassa Bassa said:
Best and kind reply. Awesome you!
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Thank you Cassa! Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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Larney said:
Shuu, what a rollercoaster!
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Indeed, it has been one. When I think there is calm, there comes another surprise.
Blessings to you! ♥♥
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utesmile said:
I just wonder why they want to date if they have so many issues. Well, the name Enigma you gave him was rather appropriate. Add it to your experience file and move on. Your answer to him is really nice. Wishing you a good week Ana.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Good point Ute!! They should sort themselves out first before involving anyone else.
And yes, learning and moving on. 🙂
Thank you and a blessed week to you as well! ♥♥
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The V Pub said:
“It is disappointing that it ends with a text. ” So sad. Such is romance in the age of social media. People don’t feel that obligation to respect each other and grant such things like a real conversation, even to say goodbye.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Rob,
What is more disappointing is the fact that he called himself a man of integrity and a gentleman, and I think that for the most part he was, but I find it a coward move to use text instead of calling.
Was he afraid I would try to talk him out of it or yell at him? Who knows…
In the end I firmly believe that he did me a favor. Next!
Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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The V Pub said:
Well, maybe he detected that disciplinarian in you 😀 Just kidding. He did do you a favor for sure.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
you speak the truth – I am not for the faint of heart.
Plus not everyone can handle a Brazilian Bombshell 😉
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The V Pub said:
*Mr. Tips perks up*.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
hahaha, it is so easy to get his attention
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The V Pub said:
But I had heard this was a good thing.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
It is all good! 🙂
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The V Pub said:
haha. Good then! Except in public, where he tries not to draw much attention.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Good thing he knows what is and it is not appropriate public behavior. You have trained him well!!!
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The V Pub said:
Yes, although he has spontaneous reactions on occcassion.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
I always wondered about that…
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The V Pub said:
Happens in the morning, at the doctors and on trains…
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A Star on the Forehead said:
I see, at the most inopportune moments.
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The V Pub said:
Exactly.
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Writer of Words, etc said:
Amazing post. I love your quotes. Hang in there… someone special is out there just waiting to meet you.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Thank you for the kind words Claudette!
I do believe he is out there, and when I least expect he will arrive 🙂
Wishing you a blessed week! ♥♥
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Cindy Georgakas said:
Oh boy and another one bites the dust. Sorry Ana Star! Maybe from now on your just say
Princess Star looking for delectable food, flowers, chocolates, champagne. and poetry. No need to meet; Deliveries Only. IDK.. hang in there. ❤️ Cindy
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A Star on the Forehead said:
hahaha, good suggestion!! I did think to myself, what was the point of writing me beautiful poetry, and the book, and flowers? So, I like to think that there was some real interest there even if for a fleeting moment.
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Cindy Georgakas said:
I thought you would like that. Well, fun while it lasted, disappointing but more on it’s way! ❤️
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A Star on the Forehead said:
There are always more and even more strange lol Never a dull moment in the dating swap 🙂
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Cindy Georgakas said:
oh yes,, always more on the horizon! one will land one day! ❤️👏
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Fingers crossed 🙂
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Cindy Georgakas said:
🤞
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throughrosetintedglasses54 said:
I really hope you find Mr right ou there somewhere. Its not an easy road.
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A Star on the Forehead said:
I have to believe that he is, otherwise this is a futile exercise in punishment lol 🙂
Thank you and blessings to you! ♥♥♥
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lillyevechristie said:
The enigma sounds like a total fantasist! nobody can do all those things! you are well rid! I bet he sent that text because you asked too many questions and he was afraid he would trip himself up! sounds like he’s been watching too much tv!!! Glad you are ok about it, there will be another one along, one of these days I’m sure it will be Mr Right xxxxx
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A Star on the Forehead said:
And there was a lot more that I left out, so I think you may be right.
He may be lying or his life is really that incredible. Either way I am better off.
He is out there, I am going to keep searching 🙂
Thank you and blessings to you! ♥♥
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lillyevechristie said:
And you my dear xx
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A Star on the Forehead said:
♥♥
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Kat said:
Men are a strange specie. I personally fail to get them. They continuously hurt my friends.
You (are) an incredibly kind person. And gracious too. Wow! I wish I could be like you. ♥️☕️
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A Star on the Forehead said:
Hi Kat,
One day I may just decide that men are not worth the effort, but for now I still dream 🙂
Lately I have been trying to choose grace, not always easy, but it feels like a much better approach to life.
oh no, you are amazing yourself! Plus, I am as flawed as they come, you just see me through your amazing eyes. ♥♥♥
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Kat said:
I have…so much ..to tell you. And o can’t. As this is a very restrictive medium
I think I’ll write a post. Some, may slam me. But I’m ok I’ll take it and it’ll be worth it
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A Star on the Forehead said:
I am all ears. Email me
blessedwithastar@hotmail.com .
Everyone will have an opinion about whatever you write about… write anyway…the joy is in writing and letting thoughts out…
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Kat said:
You are right.
I should write and letting my thoughts out. It’s the only outlet right now.
Thank you for this advice. 🙏♥️
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A Star on the Forehead said:
It is your blog so you write whatever your heart desires. I credit my blog with saving my sanity at a time when I thought I was going to die from a broken heart.
At that time I just wrote without any thought to whoever was reading – the best way to write.
Hang in there! You are loved! Blessings to you ♥♥
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