“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.”― Rumi

The Saturday night dinner never happened.

Why?
Your guess is as good as mine.

He never called or texted. On Friday night I sent him a text. He never replied. Not an excuse or explanation. Nothing. Just silence.

I cannot say I am shocked. When it comes to dating nothing shocks me anymore.

I am baffled and perplexed. I am also curious. And sad, happy and grateful.

Why would he ask me out if he had no intention of following through with it. He went on and on about taking me to dinner Saturday night. Why?

Why ignore my text? Why not reply something like: I am busy or I have to work, or I changed my mind, anything…

What should I learn from this? According to Rumi everything is a lesson and everyone is a teacher. What is the lesson here? Perhaps in this case there was no lesson, there was only a grapefruit martini that was divine and I hope to have it again.

“This being human is a guest house. Every morning is a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor…Welcome and entertain them all. Treat each guest honorably. The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.”― Rumi

If he changed his mind, which I have been often guilty of, why not say so? Why act like an immature person and hide? I have zero respect for ghosts. This is ghosting, right? This disappearing act.

I am sad that people behave in such way when there is absolutely no reason for it. On the first date we talked about being respectful and preserving other’s feelings. We talked about honesty and integrity.  All talk I guess.

I am happy that I no longer need to know the reasons behind people’s actions. I just accept and move on. He acted like a jerk. End of story.

“Be like the sun for grace and mercy. Be like the night to cover others’ faults. Be like running water for generosity. Be like death for rage and anger. Be like the Earth for modesty. Appear as you are. Be as you appear.” ― Rumi

I am grateful! Grateful that he showed me who he is right away. No energy was wasted.

Any time something like this happens I always think that is the work of my always alert guardian angels. This person was not for me, not even as a friend and my very efficient angels quickly removed him from my life. How much more blessed can a person be?

No harm done. There will always be jerks and I can’t always spot them.  Still, I am not discouraged.  I am still going to get excited about dates and potential dates.

And on that note, A.-The Renter and I are back on track. I had ignored his last text because I was not happy with his lack of communication. On Saturday, about the time I would have been on that date that didn’t happened, he called.

He again explained how busy he is because of the promotion. I don’t think he will ever be the communicator I want but at this point I am still excited about the potential. I want to meet face to face before I make any decision. We are making plans to meet in 3 weeks. I will say more when the time comes.

“Ignore those that make you fearful and sad, that degrade you back towards disease and death.”― Rumi