Tags
concert, counting Crows, Dating, facing the truth, forgiveness, I am sorry, letting go of the past, Moving forward, younger man
I am thinking that this itching could be emotional.
The sad truth is that lately I have been thinking about Ex too much. No, I don’t want him still or anything like that, but I still cannot get over the fact that he never acknowledged his wrongdoings. He never acknowledged that his actions were disrespectful and hurtful.
All I want is a “I am sorry”, that is it!
But I know better! I know I will never get that! So why can’t I let it go?
I guess this being the 1 Year Anniversary of when everything fell apart doesn’t help either.
I still don’t understand what happened and where did the so called “love” go!
I know that I cannot move forward until I let go of the past! And I had thought I had! But I guess that is how the grieving process goes, some times you have to go back to a stage that you thought you were done with.
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The worst doctor ever gave me a dosage of 10mg of a prescription that according to my pediatrician friend she gives 4 times that to babies. No wonder the itching has continued!!
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On a bright note, I have a fun date tonight. I am going to the Counting Crows concert with this guy that I have been seeing for the past 2 months. It is not serious as the age difference is a bit too much, but it is serious in the sense that we are not seeing other people.
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The cartoon below doesn’t reflect my situation but it was too funny to pass it up!
Blessed with a Star on the Forehead 
counting crows – oooooooh!! And if it helps, I AM SORRY on your ex’s behalf. There…
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oh that is so sweet and it brought a smile to my face! Blessings! 🙂
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Never cry over anyone who won’t cry over you.
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😦 easier said than done 😦
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That’s true. The Buddha said change is a part of life. All things change. Joy changes but so does sorrow. Hang in there.
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So right! Change is growth and I have been growing by leaps and bounds and becoming a much stronger person!
Thank you for your support! Blessings! 🙂
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🙂
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I too have just passed the one year spot… thought I had moved on but things sometimes resurface and the big question…why? remains unanswered.
It seems as if there are two steps one has to take, detaching from him, then moving forward. And the moving forward can’t be done before the ‘letting go’. So, as you say, it is so important to do that in order to take up the journey of ‘me’.
Great post. Thanks for sharing
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I just have to understand and accept that there are some questions that will never be answered.
So I am moving forward, one step at a time, even if the past stubbornly nags at me. I am hoping that peace and acceptance will come in due time, as I focus on the most important person: me!
Best wishes to you! Blessings! 🙂
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I agree “closure” after a break up would help the situation… I have similar feelings about past relationships (boxing classes really help) 😀
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I will have to obtain closure from another source and not from him!
Boxing classes are a great idea! I had actually been thinking about kickboxing! Blessings! 🙂
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Enjoy the date!
The whole ex thing, I hope it gets easier for you soon. It’s not easy but hey, life’s not easy. Your posts remind me of when I lost my first love. Man, I thought I’d never get over that one. But just when you think you won’t, you do. 😀
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Thank you! I will write today about it!
I know that I will get over it completely it is just taking much longer than I expected. 😦
Thank you for the support! Blessings! 🙂
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My first love through me out on my ear! It had something to due with her obtaining sobriety apparently. Hell of a note, I say! Plus she kept the dog! I never really liked that little bustard anyway.
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Now, is that a country song? if it is not it should make for a great one!
and now you made me thing of my dog that I haven’t seen in a year! and when you think there are no more tears …
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“threw”, oops. Sorry about the reference to the pooch if it saddened you.
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no worries!! 🙂
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Try imagining him saying this to you.
“I am so sorry that I didn’t explain my actions to you.”
and adding the words.
“I am not worthy of you. If I were worthy of you, I would not have caused you pain.”
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This is actually a great idea!! Thank you for that! I think the potential in that for healing is immense! I am starting it right now! Blessings! 🙂
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I hope you had fun! 🙂
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I did, thank you! 🙂
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“I guess that is how the grieving process goes, some times you have to go back to a stage that you thought you were done with.”
Yes, I get that. I wonder if I’m holding on to my anger at a particular person because I have a oversized need for things to be fair. I want the person to apologize too, but like you, I’ll never get it.
I’m hoping that my feelings of being treated unfairly eventually catch up to my intellectual knowledge about the apology never coming. If I can accept the lack of apology, then I might not feel like I need “justice” so much.
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I completely agree with you!
I too hope that I will eventually accept the reality of never having an answer as to why and an apology.
But perhaps what really hurts me is the non-acknowledgement of any wrongdoing!
Blessings to you and I hope that we both can find in ourselves to be content within our just and fair actions and no longer need it from others! 🙂
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I know it may seem important to hear those three words: I am sorry. But it does not mean that you would get any closure from hearing them. They might in fact bring up more questions. It has “only” been a year. It’s hard when we don’t understand why, but in all fairness, do we really need to? It will not change that we got hurt, it will not take away the pain. For me, hearing those words actually pulled me back in again. I got hopeful that he would realize that he made a mistake, and come back again.
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You are right that it would not change anything. I guess to me, it would in a way be his acknowledgement that he has done something wrong. I guess I am even willing to hear a “I am not sorry” for what I did, as long as he realized what he has done.
But I have to let it go completely and stop making him so important still in my life. I need to stop being his victim!
Blessings! 🙂
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Enjoy the concert. I know you’ll keep us posted on the results.
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Thank you, I did enjoy and will write about it today! 🙂
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Once, in a similar situation, I stood in my sitting room and said aloud, as if to him, the things I needed to say about how I felt. It helped me move on. Being heard, even by yourself and the imaginary other, can be a release.
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I actually had a chance to tell him everything I wanted and needed to tell him. But I got no resolution or answers, all I got back was denial and silence.
Perhaps I can, instead, say to myself all I want to hear from him and that way obtain some closure.
Thank you and blessings! 🙂
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this post is really something many can relate. thanks for voicing it out. but i guess, sometimes, we really just have to accept the harsh reality that some people just aren’t capable of owning up to their mistakes. it’s like their nature. and we really just have to get going. sorry, for this really late comment. i’ve just recently followed your blog. and you really have a great blog here. very inspiring. thanks for liking one of my posts! blessings to you! 🙂
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You are completely right, the key is to accept and move on. To continue waiting for something that will never come it is insanity!
Thank you for enjoying my posts, better late than never 🙂 I plan on enjoying yours too! 🙂
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